Notre Dame confirmed it is investigating suspected academic dishonesty by several students, including four members of the football team.
The University issued a press release late Friday afternoon and held a press conference with University President Fr. John Jenkins and Director of Athletics Jack Swarbrick later in the evening.
The press release stated there was evidence “students had submitted papers and homework that had been written for them by others.” According to Notre Dame, the evidence was referred to the compliance office in athletics July 29, and the Office of General Counsel initiated an investigation, which is still ongoing. Notre Dame notified the NCAA on Friday, according to Jenkins.
Swarbrick confirmed reports that senior receiver DaVaris Daniels, graduate student linebacker Kendall Moore, junior cornerback KeiVarae Russell and senior defensive end Ishaq Williams are being held out of practice and competition during the investigation. A source close to the team told The Observer earlier Friday that the four players in question were at the Guglielmino Athletics Complex in the morning but were not present for practice.
I’ve been a Notre Dame football fan my entire life. Born and raised on it. But it’s just becoming harder and harder to get into this team. I mean, what are they trying to do here? Why are you self reporting three of your 22 starting football players a month before the season starts? Look, if these kids had other people write their papers for them and do their homework, and administration found out and actually cared, you keep that in-house. I mean, what is the benefit of turning your own team in? Do you get a special ribbon for honesty?
Nope. You get nothing. When is Notre Dame gonna learn that only chump schools care about academic honesty? You know why Harvard and Yale suck at football? Because they care about academics. Either you’re a football school, or you’re an academic school. You can’t have it both ways.
That’s not to say your school can’t be a good school and still have high academic standards. You just can’t hold those standards to the players. Michigan and Stanford are good schools. But if you think they hold their players to the same standards that they hold normal students then I’d like to sell you my world famous horse ranch on Nantucket.
But Notre Dame for whatever reason is obsessed with this whole, “we’re better than that” attitude. Academics first. Let me be the first to say, fuck that. I’m not rooting these kids on in the classroom. I don’t wanna watch Davaris Daniels read a philosophy book and write a paper on it. I wanna watch him score touchdowns. And in order to do that he needs to be thinking about football ALL the time. Notre Dame doesn’t make millions and millions of dollars off of merchandise and TV deals because they produce good students. They’re commercially succesful because they used to be good at football.
That’s what makes the whole self reporting thing bullshit. Look, you caught the kids. Bring the four of them into Coach Kelly’s office and give them a stern talking to, complete with finger pointing and shaming. Then give them a writ of “boys will be boys” and move on with your season.
The fact that college students are expected to write the same papers and do the same amount of work as other students is bullshit too. How does that make any sense? Playing Division 1 football isn’t some campus job that pays you enough money to buy beer on the weekend. They own your life, and more importantly, there is a lot of money on the line. The school has financial incentives to make certain bowl games. So why are they trying to pretend that these kids are something that they’re not?
Remember 2012? That was awesome….until we got steamrolled by Alabama. Does anyone in their right mind think that any of those country boys on Bama can read a book, let alone write a paper? Does anyone in Alabama care if they can? No. Because they’re not Crimson Tide fans because these kids know how to use MLA citations. They’re Bama fans because they win National Championships. That’s all that matters in sports. Maybe I’m wrong and LSU, Auburn, and Georgia are factories of learned men. After all, who doesn’t think “academics first” when they hear “SEC?”
And the whole idea of vacating wins is the DUMBEST SHIT to ever hit collegiate sports. Mrs. Turtleboy asked me about what the point of doing that was today. I told her I had no fucking clue. Because as she pointed out – those wins actually happened. I saw them with me own eyes. It’s like when the NCAA stripped UMass of it’s Final Four appearance. LOL. Oh shit, all those priceless memories I had NEVER actually happened!!
Anyway, it hasn’t been announced publicly who the rat is. But Turtleboysports has sources on the ground in South Bend. Normally we wouldn’t report something that hasn’t been confirmed, but since that doesn’t stop rags like Deadpsin from reporting lies it won’t stop us from reporting the SPECULATION. Once again, this is NOT definite. It’s merely speculation from several sources that this is Notre Dame’s deepthroat:
Her name is Ally Lopshire, and she was the equipment manager for the football team in 2012. As you can see, she is a prim looking star gazer, and honorary Turtleboy Sports junior smokeshow. She’s obviously very good at writing papers too. My question is, why is she coming out with this now? I mean she did this two years ago right? Well, let’s just speculate for a moment. Did she have a chance of heart? LOL….right….Did the school start a random investigation into the equipment manager? Seems unlikely.
So what could possibly be her motivation then? Oh yea, she liked them until she realized they were using her. And a woman who just got fucked over by a dude is a dangerous, dangerous woman indeed. She realized that at the end of the day her prom dates left her on the side of the road without a ride home. She felt burned and threw them under the bus. Case closed.
My question is, when she came to school administrators, what the hell were they thinking? You have two groups of people involved here. All of them have questionable morals, so it’s not exactly like she is some innocent bystander who was manipulated here. She did something that she knew was against the rules and she did it anyway because she was getting attention from football players. Life was good.
So why the fuck is Notre Dame treating her like she’s Helen of Troy? Let’s weigh what each of these two groups brings to Notre Dame:
The football players work crazy hours for free (if you think a scholarship is payment then you better hurry up and get your down payment in for my Nantucket horse ranch). The football players brought Notre Dame to the National Championship, which in turn made millions and millions of dollars for the school. This in turn brought Notre Dame better recruits, which will lead to more winning.
Ally Lopshire folded laundry.
Gee, tough to tell who has done more for the University of Notre Dame. You know what a REAL football school does here? They ask to see the girl’s proof. Then when she brings in the computer she wrote the papers on and they smash it in front of her and tell her that she fucked with the wrong people. That’s how Saban and Urban Meyer stay on top. I mean, Meyer dealt with legitimate mass murderers at Florida and kept it all a secret. He would laugh in this girls face, press a button that opened a trap door below her feet that opens up into a gator pit, and then she’d never be heard from again.
Which brings me to another point – why the hell did she still have these papers two years later? Oh yea, because she’s a crazy beyoch who anticipated this day coming so she kept the evidence.
So yea, no one else is reporting the speculated whistle blower except for Turtleboy Sports. Remember where you heard it first. And I thought about not doing it, but the dead giveaway happened today when she deleted her Twitter account. Nothing says guilty more than that.
Feel free to share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.