All The Rules That Don’t Apply To LeBron James In This Play Is Everything That Is Wrong With The NBA

All The Rules That Don’t Apply To LeBron James In This Play Is Everything That Is Wrong With The NBA

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So I think we all knew even when the Celtics were up by 16 that we weren’t gonna win this game tonight. We gave it our best shot, and it was fun to watch. But this is the NBA and the team with the superstars is gonna win. That’s just how it works. But I just wanna take a moment to point out everything that is wrong with the NBA in one play.

On second look, it wasn’t a travel. He takes two steps and dunks it. But it is 1,000% both a 1) double dribble, and 2) 5 second violation.

“A five-second closely guarded violation may be called against an offensive player with the ball when that player is guarded closely for five seconds or more and does not pass, shoot, or dribble within that time.”

Here’s when LeBron got the ball, and was “closely guarded” by Jaylon Brown:

Notice the clock in the bottom right hand corner says 2 seconds. Here he is 6 seconds later:

Here he is 7 seconds later:

In 7 seconds he has not shot, passed, or dribbled. Easiest five second violation ever. But then again it’s the NBA, it’s LeBron James, and he’s home in the playoffs. Rules don’t apply to him.

It’s also clearly a double dribble. Here he is dribbling after holding onto the ball for 7 full seconds:

Here he is picking up his dribble (and Brown does NOT touch the ball)

And here he is dribbling again, because…..fuck it.

Don’t get me wrong, this play had nothing to do with why we lost this game. They’re just better. It’s just an example of why it’s so hard to get too invested in this particular brand of sportball.

The good news is, that even though we’re gonna lose this series 4-1, we’ll always have this:

Ya know who’s never missed a wide open go-ahead dunk in the Eastern Conference Finals? Everyone who’s ever played in the Eastern Conference Finals ever. Except LeBron.


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6 Comment(s)
  • August 29, 2017 at 4:29 pm

    Gгeetings! Very useful advice in this particular article!
    It’s the little changes that produce the largest changes.
    Thanks for sharing!

  • Bobby Showboat
    May 28, 2017 at 11:33 pm

    Maybe you should learn the rules first yourself before you accuse a player of a “closely-guarded” violation which is not a thing in the NBA, it’s NCAA only bro

  • MrTightJeans
    May 24, 2017 at 1:08 pm

    5 second rule doesn’t apply in the NBA – only in college.

  • True Reality Speaks
    May 24, 2017 at 7:30 am

    NBA is unwatchable – nothing but a dick measuring contest with schoolyard players with no concept how to play a TEAM sport. The league no longer has coaches, just professional babysitters.

    • Timmy
      May 24, 2017 at 10:42 am

      More watchable than Boston favorite Baseball. I’d rather share needles in Lowell than watch a 2-1 game for 4 hours. And look how well that team play works for the Bruins.

      The Celtics are actually a team with no real star like Lebron so quit bitching and enjoy watching a team play ball.

      Dick measuring? Go take mega star Tom Brady off the Pats and see how well they do with anyone else. You cater to stars because the help you win. Dumb fuck, how do think Jordan won 6 fucking rings and Kobe 5? Because they want to play team ball. GTFO and go watch three retards try to open a door if you want real teamwork you grumpy fuck.

  • BobnMic
    May 24, 2017 at 12:01 am

    Back to the Garden Thursday night at 8:30. I doubt the crowd will be quiet so let’s see what affect that will have. We’re just four into a seven game series lest we not forget that regardless how shitty it currently looks. We have seen Boston teams bounce back in the past. It’s in our blood.

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