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The Turtleboy boycott is back. One of our newest advertisers, Rotti’s Power Equipment and Repair Services just received this email they forwarded to us today:
I am contacting you to express humbly that your advertising on and apparent support for Turtleboysports blog may reflect poorly on your business. At least in the eyes of most intelligent people who recognize that website as crude, distasteful, classless, embarrassing and lazy attempt at informing the public. Think about how you represent yourselves by where you advertise. This is in no way a criticism on your business only an insight to how location of your ads is crucial and exposure on certain outlets can be detrimental to your brand.
It comes from [email protected], a “Thomas J.” Who knows if people are actually dumb enough to use their real names and emails when they boycott our sponsors like Joyce McNickles was. But it’s just so lame and juvenile for people to do this. If you don’t like a business, then don’t go there. If you don’t like a blog then don’t read it. But sending these vaguely threatening emails in an attempt to interfere with two businesses doing business with one another is just so high school-ish. This is what they do. These losers are threatened by the truth that we spew out on a daily basis. They know they can’t stop us so they try to cut off our funding. It’s really important for Turtleboy Nation not to let them win, and the only way to do that is by supporting the Turtleboy sponsors.
Lets break down this email to see if there is any truth to this email:
1. Intelligent people don’t like Turtleboy
False. Turtleboy Sports caters to the highest brow that society has to offer. Doctors, lawyers, judges (good judges), politicians (good politicians), nurses, cops, firefighters, first responders, teachers, principals, business owners, social workers, astronauts (probably) and people who work in virtually every industry under the sun ride the turtle on a daily basis. We know this as a fact. Off the top of my head Turtleboy can literally name a person in each of those jobs who read us on a daily basis. It is without merit to say that intelligent people don’t like Turtleboy Sports.
2. Turtleboy is crude
True and false. Mostly true. Turtleboy is bar talk. It’s how regular people talk when they’re not at work. Because the best part about being an adult and not being at work or school is being allowed to say what you want in an unfiltered manner around your friends. And since we’re all friends at Turtleboy Sports we feel like we can talk to you how we’d talk to our friends if we were having a couple frosty ones at the Union Tavern or Smitty’s.
3. Turtleboy is distasteful.
True and false. Distasteful is a subjective term since everyone has different tastes. If you have a good sense of humor, you enjoy hot takes, and you prefer to see corruption exposed and society bettered, then you will find Turtleboy tasteful. However, if you have a stick up your poopshoot and purposely look for things to take offense to, if you act a fool in public, or if you are a member of a special interest group that is currently ripping off the taxpayers or screwing over the working class, then you may find Turtleboy to be distasteful.
4. Turtleboy is classless
False. Turtleboy oozes class out of his shell. Class can be defined by “having or reflecting high standards of personal behavior.” We call out classless behavior in 99% of the blogs we write. Turtleboy is the definition of class.
5. Turtleboy is embarrassing
False. On the contrary, Turtleboy embarrasses those who have already embarrassed themselves.
6. Turtleboy is lazy
False. Couldn’t possibly be any more false. The Turtleboy investigative teams spends hours upon hours of researching for our stories. God knows how much time was put in to take down Kevin Hayes and help restore order in the Spencer-East Brookfield Public Schools, or file FOIA requests to take down the corrupt Mosaic Cultural Complex. Turtleboy is where it is today because we are the opposite of lazy. We are still hiring unpaid editors though. Apply within.
So as you can see, this emailer is a gigantic liar and possibly a poopy head. He then tells Rotti’s to “think about how you represent yourself by where you advertise.” Obviously this is a vague attempt at a threat without actually saying the word “boycott.” But to the millions who ride the turtle every month the businesses who choose to advertise with us are saying, “We support freedom and want our small business to be seen. And since Turtleboy likes to promote and support the local economy this is a good fit for our small business.” That’s how your brand is represented when it appears on Turtleboy Sports.
Finally he ends with this lie:
This is in no way a criticism on your business only an insight to how location of your ads is crucial and exposure on certain outlets can be detrimental to your brand.
First of all, it clearly is a criticism. Secondly, this emailer has definitely NEVER stepped foot in Rotti’s before. Thirdly, it’s not detrimental towards Rotti’s brand. That’s where come in Turtleboy Nation. Show Rotti’s that they made a smart decision by riding the turtle. Show them that you won’t stand for this sort of bullying, just like you all did at this time last year when the same thing happened to Bennie’s Cafe.
Unlike the Telegram and Gazette we will never charge our readers to come on our site. That’s lame. All we ask is that from time to time you do business with good people like Rotti’s. Summer is just about here, which means you’re gonna need a lawnmower. So don’t go to Walmart and feed the Walton’s lucky sperm grandchildren. Go to Rotti’s Power Equpiment and Repair Services in West Boylston and please tell them that Turtleboy sent you and that you appreciate their support of freedom.
P.S. They have way more than just lawn mowers. Check out their website for a list of services they offer.
We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.
Wormtown Brewery, Union Tavern, Scavone Plumbing, Bennie’s Cafe, JJM Insurance, Smokestack Urban Barbecue, Attorney Michael Erlich, Smitty’s Tavern, Julio’s Liquors, Solarreviews.net, The Gun Parlor Range, Attorney Anthony Salerno, Harris Auto Body, Rotti Power Equipment in West Boylston