All-Star Criminals

Death Threat Of The Day: Aaron Hernandez Fanboy Says He Will Merc Desk Girl With A Bullet In The Head, Deskies Asks For Dick Pics

Death Threat Of The Day: Aaron Hernandez Fanboy Says He Will Merc Desk Girl With A Bullet In The Head, Deskies Asks For Dick Pics

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Last week we blogged about Karl Lamas, the Aaron Hernandez fanboy who sent and received hilarious letters to the deceased murderer while he was in prison, in exchange for autographed merchandise.

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Well apparently he didn’t like this blog very much, because he’s been writing Turtleboy hilarious death threats, and now Desk Girl is in love with him. Check it out:

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Look at Deskie catfishing this guy like you read about. I’ve seen Desk Girl too many times. She WISHES she looked like that. She’s the only person ever associated with this blog who isn’t insanely attractive. And we only keep her around because she humors these people and occasionally gets them to calm the fuck down when they talk about “mercking” one of us. Plus the form she makes them fill out is hilarious, and I assume this guy was about to get it before he ended up blocking us.

Anyway, not sure if this constitutes death threats since we generally don’t believe that words on the Internet can be considered a threat. But if the New Bedford Police see this (pretty sure he lives there) and they consider it one, feel free to pay him a visit. Ya know, since he’s a convicted felon who worships a convicted murderer, and he’s telling Desk Girl that she’s gonna get a bullet in her head. Not nice. As much as I can’t stand the sight of her, she works for cheap and our inbox gets flooded every day and none of us want to deal with these idiots. So yea, if she died that would suck.

 

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15 Comment(s)
  • Jcey
    May 1, 2017 at 8:16 pm

    What a flipping hoot! I almost wet myself reading this article…

  • Turd Burglestein
    May 1, 2017 at 4:42 pm

    Next time deskie does the “Am I pretty” message, you should send a picture of the guttermuppet.

  • Chuck
    May 1, 2017 at 4:27 pm

    Bust him he’s threatening violence, make him take a shower, he looks dirty.

  • MSIII
    May 1, 2017 at 2:31 pm

    You deleted my comment? Someone claiming to work for you threatened my children and slashed my tire. You don’t want that public i suppose. Who is Kevin Lynch? If your employee’s are brave enough to threaten children then keep this up pu$$y

    • Fiesty Turtle Lady
      May 1, 2017 at 4:07 pm

      Here, take this bag of rotten dicks as a consolation prize. Mix and matched dicks, mostly unwanted oddly shaped ones.

  • Charisma Beauty
    May 1, 2017 at 2:00 pm

    I love how he corrected her spelling of Aaron given that he wrote “got his lunch money tooking”.

  • Wtf
    May 1, 2017 at 1:50 pm

    I think everyone loves deskie!!! I need her to deal with some of my customers so I don’t tell them to fuck off. Lol.

  • Richard Marsh
    May 1, 2017 at 1:31 pm

    I could not care less if desk girl is fugly… I LOVE HER!

  • MSIII
    May 1, 2017 at 1:31 pm

    Kevin Lynch touched me.

    • Mike
      May 1, 2017 at 2:16 pm

      Nobody from TB threatened you, you stinky hole!

      • BadClick
        May 1, 2017 at 2:53 pm

        Shit I accidentally down voted. That does not count. Just setting the record straight.

    • LocalYokel
      May 1, 2017 at 2:23 pm

      You should contact Atty Richard N. Vulva immediately if you haven’t already. He’s building a large, engorged action case file against the Turtlelosers.

  • Maggie the Cat
    May 1, 2017 at 1:24 pm

    OMG! That was great.

    • Gas Pipe
      May 1, 2017 at 8:26 pm

      Fantastic article.

      We should have Desk GIrl send another text, educating that fucking waste of oxygen, and letting him know that the #81 shirt didn’t skyrocket in sales when that scumbag was arrested 4 years ago for murder.

      Stands to reason it’s officially worth dick cheese now that he’s dead.

      Only New Bedford (of all places) would a self proclaimed gangsta think that shirt is worth money.

      He needs his man card revoked for pen paling another man in jail…AND selling the letters.

      • Gas Pipe
        May 1, 2017 at 9:14 pm

        AND BURN THE FUCKING BULLS HAT ALREADY! The fad is over! All the shit stick wangstas THAT wear them weren’t alive when that team was actually a contender!

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