Hoodrat Heroes

Drug Dealing Worcester Skankatron Mom Starts Christmas GoFundMe For Crotch Fruits After Prison Lover Steals Her Nikes And Leaves Her For Scissormaster 

Follow and Subscribe to Turtleboy podcasts on SoundCloud or iTunes by clicking here

Click on the hat to get your MIGA Turtleboy 2020 hat today!

Follow and like the Turtleboy Sports Returns, and Clarence Woods Emerson to keep up with the hilarious turtle rider commentary.

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at [email protected] for more information.

If you like free speech and want to support what we’re doing, feel free to donate to the Turtle fund:




 

 

 

 

 

 

Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 

 

Christmas is almost here, which means the ratchet Mom GoFundMes asking strangers to play Santa for their crotch fruits is about to come to a glorious end. Here’s one last winner for the road.

Christine “Cree” Wardell wants you to give her $500 so her kids can have the Christmas they deserve. Of course what they really deserve is a real Mom who takes care of her kids, rather than relying on the Internet to do that for her.

Now I understand that sometimes people fall on hard times. But according to Cree here she was “robbed” and drained her bank accounts, presumably because they knew her pin numbers. Except she forgot to point out one important part of the equation – the chick who “robbed” her was her scissoring partner from jail, and she’s just angry that after they got out of jail her lover went back to her primary lickalotapuss and ditched her altogether.

“An amateur can’t fuck with a pro.”

And by pro she means, “one who panhandles for free shit for their kid’s Christmas.”

Sadly prison relationships don’t always have the fairy tale endings they do on OITNB. You just take what you can get while you’re locked up so they can keep your taco warm for the real thing when you get out.

As you can see in her post she accuses them of stealing “Crisp Nike Air, pair 1” and some TV’s, but doesn’t mention anything about cash or draining her bank account. Because I’m gonna go out on a limb and guess that she wouldn’t know how to open a bank account if she tried.

I don’t even know what she was in jail for when she met her former lover, because she seems to post about coming back from jail a lot.

And she’s got Google trophies that have grown their own Google trophies.

So it’s hard to keep track. All I know is skankatron was arrested most recently on September 18 for selling drugs.

Christine Wardell, 43, of 33 Falmouth St., Worcester, pleaded not guilty to distribution of a Class B controlled substance and conspiracy to violate the controlled substance act. She was released on personal recognizance with a GPS ankle bracelet and an order to remain alcohol and drug free. Her case was continued to Nov. 7.

Oops! Looks like that lawyer money might be the real reason she’s asking other people to play Santa for her. LOL. Just kidding. I think we can all jump to the conclusion that she’s got a court appointed lawyer anyway. Next year for Christmas hopefully her kids ask Santa for a Mom who doesn’t make it onto Turtleboy.

17 Comment(s)
  • judge dread
    December 24, 2018 at 1:39 pm

    $5bn was sent to latin america recently over the wall funding.

    hrmmm… does that sound like a “bribe” rather than “aide”. here’s billions of dollars you scum dogs. stop exporting your 75 iq shit birds up north.

    money wall or real wall, anyway, it’s happening.

  • Principal Wartz
    December 22, 2018 at 11:30 am

    Hey TB. If you are taking a Christmas break, can you leave us with a real kick ass story? Something about some ratchet pig bitch? Dome low down skank? Thank you. That is all

  • Nasty Town
    December 21, 2018 at 11:01 pm

    I would take this woman and love her till the end of time. She wouldn’t want for anything. But, she would have to submit to my every pleasure

  • Ruining kids lives one public GFM at a time
    December 21, 2018 at 10:01 pm

    Her kids have most definitely been removed due to her irresponsible behavior. AS IF she’s gonna drag $500 worth of gifts to the DCF family room. We allllllll know she’s gonna pick up some worthless plastic doodads from Family Dollar and call it a win. Oh and hunny, everyone knows about free gifts for hurting families from local churches, police departments, and firefighters. So pathetic. And hey, what about her welfare or disability checks? She’s definitely suckling on the freeloader teat.

  • Amy M
    December 21, 2018 at 9:33 pm

    No renter’s insurance? Haha.

    • z
      December 21, 2018 at 9:39 pm

      Insurance is for suckers in ratchet world.

  • briggs
    December 21, 2018 at 9:14 pm

    y’all ratchet for believing this shit anyone considered that she really did get robbed by someone that she was helping. Someone that she meet in jail and helped out once out of jail. Why are guys feeding into this and whats the basis of this article. just another person that people jump on the band wagon talking shit for what to what end just gossip really

  • Clitty Litter
    December 21, 2018 at 8:13 pm

    Wow!
    $25 in 2 weeks. That must be some sort of record.

  • Sick of these ratchet fucks
    December 21, 2018 at 7:33 pm

    Can’t wait for the go fund season to be over. Is there any go funds set up for hot molds who need a legit hand? Lololololol.. That’s one I could sign onto! These douche canoe GFMs can crawl back into the skank trench they came from. Can this bitch be any more disgusting? “Oh hey, lets go do shots at the grave” “then I can go piss in the woods and start a GFM”

  • z
    December 21, 2018 at 7:30 pm

    Just warning her, when she goes out for a job interview they check social media these days.

    As if she is ever going to have a job interview.

    • Sick of these ratchet fucks
      December 21, 2018 at 7:35 pm

      How do you starve a ratchet? Hide her EBT card in her work uniform!

  • Dick Hearton
    December 21, 2018 at 7:04 pm

    Merry Christmas Fuckers and a Buakake New Years to all… Hoe Hoe Hoe.

  • The Vorlon
    December 21, 2018 at 7:00 pm

    What her children really need is for their Monster, err, Mother to catch a .357 slug in the brainpan.

  • Two Patch Crappy Jack
    December 21, 2018 at 5:55 pm

    Worcester…. Gotta love it. I would consider giving for a free trip around the world… After that She can be on her way. I dunno I like these alky tattoo bitches. Good for a fuck on a cold night.

  • Y
    December 21, 2018 at 4:41 pm

    Don’t give these ppl anything; if you’re going to donate, may I suggest donating to the following:
    gofundme.com/TheTrumpWall

    • WeAreFucked
      December 21, 2018 at 5:48 pm

      I thought our president said “Mexico will pay for it?”

      • don
        December 22, 2018 at 12:19 pm

        the way trump made nafta, mexico is actually paying for the wall. step out of the basement sometime.

Comment on this Post

*

RELATED POSTS
All-Star Worcester Parents Lay Siege To School Bus, Beat Up Bus Driver, Then Write Magnificent Things On Facebook
Comments From The Worcester Parent Bus Riot Blog Were Borderline Orgasmic
Hot Girl Threatening To Sue Turtleboy Sports Over Busgate, City Council Still Hasn’t Even Mentioned It