• Florida Ratchet Turns Himself In For Robbing A Bank And Admits He Googled “How To Rob A Bank” Beforehand, Also Enjoys Making Jokes About The Vegas Shooting



    Florida Ratchet Turns Himself In For Robbing A Bank And Admits He Googled “How To Rob A Bank” Beforehand, Also Enjoys Making Jokes About The Vegas Shooting

    Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us to [email protected] for more information

     

     

     

     

    FOX: A robber Googled “how to rob a bank,” before committing the crime, deputies said. Pinellas County deputies arrested William Johnson, 26, of Pinellas Park. According to detectives, he robbed the Achieva Credit Union at 10125 Ulmerton Road in Largo on the morning of October 5. When inside the bank, they said he approached the bank teller, implied he had a gun and fled with an undisclosed amount of cash. He was found at the Express Inn located at 11333 U.S. Highway 19 North in Pinellas Park, where he was staying as a guest.

    Detectives said he admitted to the bank robbery. Johnson told them he needed money and, as a result, he Googled how to rob a bank. He also said he originally planned to rob the Wells Fargo Bank at 10500 Ulmerton Road but when he entered, he changed his mind after seeing the teller was a large male. 

    I always thought robbing a bank was a simple procedure, Get a gun, a mask, and a getaway driver, scare the shit out of a 17 year old teller, get some cash and leave. But, we aren’t dealing with a scholar ratchet here. This guy might be the biggest fraud ratchet ever though.

    Here is William Johnson:

    As you can see from the cover photo, we are off to a ratchet start. William Johnson isn’t your typical hoodbooger though – he seems to find humor in the Las Vegas mass shooting. And even refers to Stephen Paddock as his “man”

    Imagine trying to be funny so hard that you post memes about the biggest mass shooting in US history? Then refer to the shooter as “my man” followed by a long paragraph of some verbal diarrhea conspiracy theory? What a bitch.

     

     

    Sometimes in life, you have to take your own advice. Going backpage probably would have been a smarter choice for Bill Ratchet here. he could probably pass for a soft 6/10 for Florida crackheads.

    Sorry to take some wind out of your sails buddy, but it looks like the Buccaneers #superbowl campaign is off to a slow start. Let’s just hope your boi “Famous Jameis” doesn’t start googling “How To Throw Straight.” Then again, it’s probably better than taking advice from Dirk Koetter…

    Well, he’s right on the mark with this one.

    This had to be the most ratchet party ever. Gear up Savage Heaven, bring your air mattress, because there’s only one survivor in the Johnson house.

    Alright, Bill Ratchet has officially hit the trifecta of ratchet rednecks. Let me make this clear, there is nobody worse in this world than people who get Alabama tattoo’s and constantly tweet “Roll Tide” every fucking day. From the rap lyrics, to the gang sign selfies, throwing the N word out willy nilly, air mattresses, BB Guns, and Bulls attire – It’s clear William Johnson is the biggest try hard ratchet ever. Real ratchets don’t get scared of a tall bank teller, they’re numb to logic. Also, wearing the Bulls sweatshirt over the hat is a cop out move, cutting corners once again.

     

    We urge you to support the following local businesses. They provide terrific services for the community!

     

    Screen Shot 2017-02-01 at 10.32.58 AM

    Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM

    Screen Shot 2017-02-27 at 10.14.48 AM

    Screen Shot 2017-03-31 at 2.17.19 PM

    screen-shot-2016-12-05-at-8-36-43-pm

    unnamed (1)

     

    4ba27317-991b-4352-b70d-f489eadcfdef (1)

    Screen Shot 2017-03-25 at 8.48.23 PM

     

     

     

     

    Join the Discussion

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

    Discussion

    1. chrissy


      a couple of notes, since I now have an adorable comfort puppy avatar..

      this wegro gives me homicidal impulses

      and paddock realllly stinks of Manchurian candidate…
      not that I subscribe to any of the conspiracy theories but just saayinnnn

    2. Lisa


      But the bulls sweatshirt got cropped out. Were not seeing this loser in all his ratchet glory.

    3. The Rant Queen


      Pansy ass bitch lmao!

    4. Jake


      Florida he’s history.

    5. Wwy


      The kikes will make American sniper 3 to make their shekels off the Vegas shooting like they done with the Iraqi holocaust,and the 856 movies about their own terrorism in Germany.

    6. Hughbo Mont


      With the elections coming, you need to focus on The Woo. WGAF about Florida?

    7. Stan the man


      The only problem with Florida is its in Florida

    8. Flo FLocka


      Uh Las Vegas was not the biggest shooting in America ever. The gov would love if people believed that. The top 2: Wounded Knee and more recently Waco. Government is always the biggest killer of its citizens. Ask the Bolsheviks.

    9. Not wearing a flat brimmed bulls hat


      i like the whitewash lies my government feeds me

  • arrow