Groton Basic White Chick With $200 GoFundMe Because “Douchey” UVM Cops Stole Her Bong And She’s “Freaking Out” Without Weed Goes Full “Fuck The Police”
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This is the most basic white chick GoFundMe of all time out of the murder capital of the world – Groton:
“guys I lost like $250 worth of stuff to this douchey cop who “saw my bong through my window” and now I have to pay like $500 in fines and not to be dramatic but I’m gonna freak out without weed and I just spent $100 on a new bong that got taken and I’m very distraught and so yeah basically fuck the police and If u want to donate me even a dollar I’m such a broke bitch now and I’m barely surviving college and all those fuckers left me was a fireball nip :(“
I think the most remarkable part of this rant is that it’s written by a college student.
That’s a longer sentence then a Deval Patrick appointed judge has ever given any criminal that has ever stepped foot in their courtroom. No wonder she’s freaking out without weed – she’s on her period. And I mean that literally – she’s sitting on a period, couldn’t find it when she needed it, and that’s why she turned a sentence into a paragraph.
Yup, you read that right – this is a GoFundMe because the “douchey cops” took her bong. I’m sure that’s the whole story too. A cop just randomly walked by her dorm room at UVM, the biggest pothead school that has ever existed, and took $250 worth of her shit and locked her ass up. And none of it is her fault for publicly displaying her bong for the world to see or failing to keep a low profile. It’s all the cop’s fault because……fuck the police.
But yea, she’s wicked “broke.” This chick right here is really struggling without her purple haze and bong:
Oh, and she wants you to pay for her birth control.
Sure, she could just get a 10 hour a week job swiping student ID cards at the campus center so she could have a little weed and booze cash like every other college student that has ever be in her situation. But why should she work when she can just get her idiot friends to pay for the mess she created?
According to her she has a job though:
So I guess she has money, she just wants to use other people’s money to pay for her weed.
Newsflash – we’ve all been there before. Sometimes you run out of weed or devices to smoke it out of. Back in ought one there was two solutions:
- Scrape the bowl and take resin hits. It’s not the greatest thing in the world, but it sure beats not smoking anything. Make sure you hold it in for a while before exhaling, because the hits won’t be as good and it’s gonna go faster than normal. So you really wanna make sure you get the most value out of each puff.
- Find some dirty shwagg from Webster that K-Von is selling down on the 3rd floor of Coolidge for five bucks, roll it up with two ply toilet paper, lick a tiny bit so it doesn’t burn too fast, and let the good times roll.
But GoFundMe? More like Go fuck yourself. It’s amazing that she got all these idiots to donate over $100 to her already. Jake gave $40!!
Sorry dude, it’s not gonna get you laid. Not for $40 at least.
My friends would’ve told my scavenging ass to pound sand. But that was back in the day when you could tell people the truth without hurting their feels.
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