The only confirmed injury seems to be someone who got caught in the stampede to safety, according to sources at Revere PD.
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Last night, we brought you breaking news about the annual Revere
Ruckus Carnival where shots had been fired, sending weebles wobbling and waddling this way and that, taking shelter at the nearby Speedway and Walgreen’s Pharmacy just outside of Linden Square in Malden.
Info was pouring in by the second, and unconfirmed reports swirled. We’d heard an unconfirmed report regarding 4 victims, including a pregnant woman and a toddler, which were false so we’d like to retract that bit and will issue an update in the original blog as well. My bad, turtleriders.
A source with Revere PD confirmed to North Shore Turtlebabe that there was only one injury, not related to a gunshot, and it came from pounding pavement a little too fast across Squire Road. The only other casualties were 3 cars that were shot up in the parking lot. All in all, refreshing to hear; we’re glad no one was seriously injured and we hope whomever this person is has a speedy recovery.
In our data deluge, a velociratchet by the name of Elmo Reyes was brought to our attention. This poophead thought it’d be a great idea to document herself on social media raiding the carney stands of their plush prizes while everyone else fled in terror.
Heyooooo, Elmo, bad idea, toots.
We said last night we hoped the Revere fuzz were watching so they could bag this broad. Well of course they were! Local PDs love us and most ride the turtle religiously, and we all know that Turtleriders are the best, the brightest, the hottest, and just the hands-down best anywhere. A source with Revere PD let us know that she was on their radar and that she should probably keep her eye on her mailbox in the coming days. Gotta be smarter than that, Elmo!
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