• The Gun Parlor

  • Sergeant Stranger-Danger Richard Woodhead Arrested For Kiddie Porn In Attleboro


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    Look at Deputy Diddler in all of his creepy, predator glory:

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    Red Flag #1: A grown ass man posing with Woody Woodpecker looking like he’s having the best day of his life and can’t wait to go get an ice cream cone with rainbow sprinkles!

    I get it. Woodhead.

    I’m going to call him Dick Woodhead though because it seems so much more appropriate.

    Dick was arrested at his home on 36 Kerry Drive in Attleboro and brought to court in Rhode Island on kiddie porn charges today.

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    Witnesses saw Homeland Security, R.I. State Police and members from the Rhode Island State Police Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force seizing computers and boxes from his home. It was an attorney that discovered a hidden compartment in his bedroom closet which had child pornography in it. Also found in Dick’s secret cubby O’ fun was a bottle of some sort of acetone solution labeled “Jamba Juice” which prosecutors believe he may have been huffing.

    What. A. Fucking. Creep.

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    It seems as though ol’ Dick has been being investigated since September of 2016 and there are telephone conversations and “documents” to corroborate the allegations against him.

    Ya know, in case the secret stash of naked children wasn’t evidence enough.

    Dick is 52, married to Deborah Woodhead and has two adult children. He’s been active on the Attleboro police force for 32 years. Maybe that’s what warrants him being on PAID ADMINISTRATIVE LEAVE while they dig up more dirt on him. It’s unbelievable that this suckwad is earning money while sitting in a court room facing felony charges. I think today I’ll knock over a 7-11 and drive drunk over my neighbors lawns with a hooker in my trunk. I’ll get arrested but will still get a paycheck, right? No? I thought that’s how this worked…

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    So his charges are possession of child pornography, attempting to entice a minor for sex and attempted receipt of child pornography. What a standup member of society. He didn’t enter a plea and is being held until a bail nearing next Wednesday even though his judge tried to get him released with a GPS ankle bracelet. Why not get his a terry-cloth robe and a cucumber face mask while you’re at it?

    It seems that everyone who works with Dick had no idea he was a fucking weirdo even though his job title on his Facebook page looks like this:

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    Yes, he’s a juggler at the circus kids!

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    I don’t believe that these people are as shocked as they claim to be. Look at this skeeve! He has those empty, beady eyes and probably has sweaty hands and wears crocks with wool socks when he’s off duty. He’s like a bootleg version of Lenny from Of Mice And Men it’s highly likely he may have a cemetery of dead animals buried behind the woodshed in his back yard.

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    Discussion

    1. Mass Writer


      A pedophile AND a police officer? Man, I wouldn’t want to be that guy if he has to do time in prison…

      1. Your name here*


        LMFAO that’s a great point. Those are literally the two worst things you can be in prison

      2. Green Hill Turtle


        you bet your sweet ass he’s going to prison…
        dont drop the soap now dickie woodhead…

    2. Paul Larson


      Pedophilia is a mental illness. Woodrow Wilson (a progressive democrat) self diagnosed his pedophilia in 1932. Mussolini was impressed. Acting on pedophiliac urges is counter productive to longevity. Semen retention is key to life. Semen contains vitality. I have been retaining semen since 1984. (Ronald Reagan’s reelection just got me all sex nuts.) In lieu of sexual gratification, I have taken up the hobby of letter writing. I’m so good at. So good, you don’t even know. Here is a letter and a rosewood engraved pen I found:

      Worcester Telegram & Gazette

      Dear Mr. Larson,

      July 2, 2012

      Congratulations.

      Your letter to The People’s Forum has been selected as the Letter of the Week.
      Your engraved rosewood Telegram & Gazette Letter of the Week pen is enclosed. We hope you enjoy it.

      Regards,
      Chris Sinacola
      Editor of the Editorial Pages

      Of course now the T&G is just an apologist for the undemocratic Democratic Party!

      Paul Larson

    3. Bob Saget


      Castrate this pig

      1. Benjamin Dover


        With a rusty chainsaw.

    4. Lola Bunny


      Wonder how “a lawyer” found his secret stash in a closet? Weird. Honestly I don’t think he really has a “diddler look” to him. I can see it now after the fact I guess, but he pretty much looks like a typical old cop if you ask me.

    5. No One


      Just wait. There is more to come. Personnel file and all…

    6. Kevi bashed in my skull


      Who has a porn stash hidden? Seriously, like film? That alone tells you all you need to know.

      Sounds like a another victim of perverted-justice dot com

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