WTF

This Reparations Website Is The Most Brilliant Way To Get Free Money From Dumb White People

 

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Good news for all the social justice warriors out there consumed with white guilt – you finally have a chance to alleviate your white guilty once and for all. That’s right, an official website for reparations has been created just for you!! Check it out:

I’m not even kidding you, it’s a real thing. Dumb white people offer free shit to black people who are using them to get free shit. Black people get free shit, and white people get to alleviate their white guilt. Everyone’s a winner:

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It’s just so hilarious. My favorite example was #6 – “come yell at me.” God, white people are so dumb sometimes.

Here’s a couple of requests for reparations that have been posted:

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Honestly, it’s brilliant. White people in the burbs have money, and they’ve become convinced by the media that innocent black folks are getting beat up by the cops like hot cakes. Any black person who isn’t posting on this site is a sucker.

This guy is a moron:

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Come on man, we got white people lining up to give you money, and all you can ask for is a cabin in the woods? Act like you’ve been there before.

Anyway, I think it’s time Turtleboy makes a user name on this site and asks for some reparations. Black folks aren’t the only ones who can make make bank on this brilliant scheme.

70 Comment(s)
  • Musah Abdul Rauf
    December 22, 2016 at 8:48 am

    My name is Musah Abdul Rauf from Ghana and the reason for me contacting your organization is to help solve my problem financially. Am 22years of age who completed my high school and no money to further so I have to take off to the city to work and earn a living. There is an opportunity I had as a community teaching assistance which has a low income salary. My financial problem is about paying my room rent. I have no where to stay and do the teaching, please want your organisation to help me pay my rental bill and I will be very grateful for this opportunity and I hope my request will be granted upon
    Should u want to contact me on my cell phone here is my number +233557034870
    Thank u.

  • rat
    August 2, 2016 at 8:19 pm

    I’m just gonna leave you folks to bounce around in your narrow-minded right-wing echo chamber.

  • The Great Dolemite
    July 31, 2016 at 11:39 am

    Yo! Where am all da white womenz at?

    • BobnMic
      August 2, 2016 at 1:25 am

      Hey Great Dolemite. I got two of them right the fuck here Dog. Dumb (Fiesty as Lloyd) and Dumber (ProfessorM as Harry). Take them PLEASE!

      Caution: Wear ear plugs. And maybe a blind fold. And hide the knives from Lloyd. She’ll cut you. And take all the reading materials away from Harry. She thinks she is some sort of Mickey Spillane or something. Earplugs ought to do the trick.

      Best of luck.

  • Wwy
    July 30, 2016 at 12:46 am

    This is too funny 3-4 million Jews died in WW2 by Germany,Italy,and the Vatican. Reparations-give someone else’s land to them,lol. They never killed Jews during the time but Palestine suffers because Germany sent there terrorists out of there country. The slave trade killed roughly 100 million blacks on ships owned by Jews especially Moises levy. Maybe a trip to the(lol) holocaust museum will teach you this. No they still say 6 million died sounds better and all that catholic guilt. The stupidity of Americans is embarrassing to normal Americans. Can any turtlejews explain why this is you poor things.

    • Audrey
      July 30, 2016 at 2:16 pm

      ^ Is Konnie Luke’s Jewish? You should try asking her, she must have been around back then.

    • Wwy
      August 2, 2016 at 1:00 am

      So I’m right the Jews were the first “black lives matter” group. You poor things. This is why U.S soldiers die to protect Israel. Sick people. Now I know why our country is so sick.

  • TurtleBoySpurts
    July 29, 2016 at 9:46 pm

    Gosh, it warms my heart to see the dwindling advertising footprint here at TBS. And I just sent the president of Liberty Mutual a note saying i was changing carriers if they persist in advertising here. Looking forward to you going down the drain along with the rest of the Trumpsters. Fuck all you haters. Carry on.

    • Sal Monella
      July 29, 2016 at 10:03 pm

      And I’m sure the President of Liberty Mutual will take the time out of his/her day to read your email and wonder if all the worlds problems will be solved if TBS were just shut down.

      If you don’t like this site, take a knitting needle and poke your eyes out, then you’ll be blind to all the First Amendment speech here.

  • BobnMic
    July 29, 2016 at 4:18 pm

    This cannot be a serious web site but watch all of those that think it is for real, get all riled up then come on here and do a crazy rant. And the dummies that will be dying to do a reparation. That’ll be the punch line.

    If you ever watched Impratical Jokers on TruTV – one funny episode is when the guys on the show are in Central Park attempting to gather signatures to support a cause to end slavery on Long Island. And all of the pink haired SJWs were shocked that this is happening and lined up to sign up. Fucking hilarious just like this one.

    • Bob'sNuts
      July 29, 2016 at 5:44 pm

      I hate to break it to you , Bob, but human trafficking is a thriving industry in this country. You should get out more. Maybe read a newspaper…

      • BobnMic
        July 29, 2016 at 10:33 pm

        Again another butthurt loser with no sense of humor. Seems to be an epidemic here these days.

        • Bob'sNuts
          July 29, 2016 at 10:42 pm

          Sorry if I don’t find human trafficking funny. Maybe you can volunteer to help the effort to end it…

          • BobnMic
            July 30, 2016 at 2:49 am

            Well listen to this “Bob’Nuts” you asshat. You have no idea what I have done and achieved in my lifetime that have contributed to this country via military service and service to the citizens of Worcester. Also with that capacity in all I will never tell you.

            And Fiesty, I thought this was all done. No more shit you said. Oh well, a liar you are. Pick on someone else with your many fake names. Stop being a dick head. Jesus H. Christ.

            FYI – I have developed through the internet a way to identify those that are causing problems on here with the intent to push all of those legitimate commenters away. I have started with someone on here and got great results and are ready to reveal if he keeps fucking with me. Do not make me start with you. I never lose.

          • Bob'sNuts
            July 30, 2016 at 8:33 am

            There’s the Bob I love. I knew I had to wait until about 2:30 am. By the way, I am not Feisty. I have much more class than that.

          • BobnMic
            July 30, 2016 at 3:19 am

            Ok I got that Fiesty with your thumbs down. And that means so so so much to me. Ya right you are so demented you live by the votes. You are so wondering what people think of you on here. Such a joke. It’s just a blog freak. You are such a freak.

            So for now on I am going to join up with Fred and fucking rock with him regarding your fucking disgusting existence with your absolute stupid everything that you say rants and make you happy to be sad you fuck shit stain idiot. Fuck you. You are such a moron.

            Feisty – you suck so bad it is unbelievable. Go away. What will it take? I will send you a check to go away if that is what you
            need…

          • BobnMic
            July 30, 2016 at 3:28 am

            “FYI – I have developed through the internet a way to identify those that are causing problems on here with the intent to push all of those legitimate commenters away.”

            What I really meant to say is to NOT to push those legitimate commenters away. Fucking one word changes everything…

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 30, 2016 at 9:32 am

            Yup, using a name like Bob’s Nuts is classy! Your definition of that word is obviously skewed.

            BobnMic, I’m not going to say “not me” everytime someone here follows you around. If it’s me, I say it is. No need for me to hide. You posted at 3:30am, do you know what I was doing at that time? Sleeping, like a regular person.

          • Bob'sNuts
            July 30, 2016 at 10:30 am

            You don’t think Bob’s nuts?

          • ProfessorM
            July 30, 2016 at 10:22 am

            Oh for Fucks Sake. Bob….. Why the fuck are you threatening people on here again? If someone parodies you, just fucking be an adult and move the fuck on with it. People do it to me all the time. Do you see me going, “I’m gonna find you fake Professor M.. I’m going to find you and make you pay, I never lose”
            Do you know why I do not freak out on the fake me’s and threaten them? Because it’s fucking useless!! Because we are on the Internet and you need to start acting like a grown assed man. Stop posting a million times defending your honor. The only reason people come back and back and make fun of you all the time is because you fucking feed them. You continue to comment to them, and act like your a tough guy. If you just stopped, they’d stop.

          • BobnMic
            July 30, 2016 at 3:29 pm

            Fuck off ProfessorM. Mind you own fucking business you idiot.

          • ProfessorM
            July 30, 2016 at 9:03 pm

            Lmao.. Which is why everyone will KEEP making fun of you. So, from now on I’ll just sit back and have a good laugh at your expense….

          • BobnMic
            July 30, 2016 at 10:29 pm

            From now on Fiestynolawyernolady will be referred to as Lloyd and Professor (of nothing) M will be referred to as Harry. Hey they made an all women’s Ghostbusters movie right? Why not a female version of Dumb and Dumber.

            Fiesty (Lloyd) starts off with posting something dumb. And 99.9% of the time here comes ProsfessorM (Harry) bringing up the rear to post the same thing but only dumber.
            The new adventures of Dumb and Dumber starring Fiesty fake lawyer as Lloyd and fake ProfessorM as Harry. This ought to be a hoot.

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 30, 2016 at 11:15 pm

            You tell jokes like my 84 year old grandmother, and she’s dead. Go back on your meds, psycho.

          • BobnMic
            July 31, 2016 at 12:05 am

            Hey Lloyd – how long has your 84 year old Grand Mother been dead? If it’s been a year would that make it 83 years of living?

            Stick pencils in your nose. That would be much better and it would make so much sense.

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 31, 2016 at 12:58 am

            CWA 1395 huh ? 😉

            Keep going! You’re almost at the finish line!

            P.S. She died a few years ago. If she was alive, she too would tell you to suck a dick. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree!

          • BobnMic
            July 31, 2016 at 2:37 am

            Hey Lloyd – I am curious doll face. Do you actually have a brain? And if so do you use it? It does not have been seen in here yet so I wonder there Lloyd… (dba Fiestyfakelawyer)…

          • BobnMic
            July 31, 2016 at 3:04 am

            Well you know something – you started this whole debacle there Lloyd so go fuck yourself to the point where the two of you pukes on each other. You brought this on and this is what you get for being such a total fucking beyond belief asshole (s).

            And of course Harry will throw down something stupid as always with something really stupid as always and I will come back and fuck with Dumb and Dumber as I will never quite. So go fuck you two assholes.

          • BobnMic
            July 31, 2016 at 3:22 am

            Oh and P.S. Way off with the Verizon CWA 1395 stuff. I do not work for anybody there Lloyd, I OWN. Big difference not like you would know what the fuck that is all about. Does Target stores offer dental? Just curious.

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 31, 2016 at 11:11 am

            Funny, I only mentioned CWA 1395, yet you mention that it’s Verizon. Aww…. lol you told on yourself. You’re so stupid. You do work there. Would you like the screen shot conversations of you thanking people for supporting the strike? Of course, you’re fucking stupid so they have you handling things that are far away from human beings.

            Also, Maddie wants you to stop flirting with her at work. She also thinks you’re slightly racist toward latino people. Bye bye!!

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 31, 2016 at 12:16 pm

            I’m sure you won’t read this until 4pm when you regularly wake up. You stay up all night playing video games and posting here… So, you sleep your days away. A real life vampire.

          • ProfessorM
            July 31, 2016 at 5:31 pm

            Watch out man…. Bob owns Verizon. Like.. All of Verizon. He just said so, and since it’s the Internet, it has to be true!

          • BobnMic
            July 31, 2016 at 9:16 pm

            Good one Harry. Not really. And when was the last time I played the tough guy exactly? Oh that’s right you cannot answer that question so what are you talking about Harry? And Floyd, I had to look up CWA 1395 because I had no idea what you were talking about AGAIN!

            But by all means keep the idiocy coming. It is quite amusing. I’m going back on topic now so you two morons (Dumb and Dumber) have a blast with yourselves ok?

      • Homer
        July 30, 2016 at 12:04 pm

        Well Bob, my e-mails are as safe as Hillary Clintons…………………DOH!

    • Bob'sNuts
      July 30, 2016 at 12:56 pm

      I’m going to stop being mean to you. But Dude, you make it way too easy.

      • BobnMic
        July 31, 2016 at 12:18 am

        Hey as long as you are not dumb and dumber I like it. And for the record – I am Nuts. I work my way through it kinda sort of…

  • Shaniqua
    July 29, 2016 at 3:18 pm

    I jus wants to know who am my babies daddies an where am did them go with my EBT cardz.

  • Love, Me
    July 29, 2016 at 2:43 pm

    If you want to yell and scream at someone, you don’t need white people volunteering as tribute on the facemachine – you just need a FetLife account. It’s a win-win for both sides.

  • Sal Monella
    July 29, 2016 at 12:37 pm

    I had some nachos, habanero mango hot wings and five manhattans at a bar in Denver last night. I’m going to have some reparations fo some black folk in about four hours. Where do I make my reparations?

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      July 29, 2016 at 12:50 pm

      After what you have consumed, probably the toilet, stat!

      • Reddog
        July 29, 2016 at 8:12 pm

        Sal will probably do more damage to the toilet than your husband did this morning.

        • FiestyLawyerLady
          July 29, 2016 at 8:45 pm

          I swear, it’s like a trademark!

    • wtatnuckgangsta
      July 29, 2016 at 4:22 pm

      Hey neighbor. We need to get organized and start The Greater Denver Area Reparations (Bowel) Movement. It’s almost supper time.

      • Sal Monella
        July 29, 2016 at 9:58 pm

        Plane stopped in Detroit. Deposits made to the Airport Reparations Account. Any BLM or SJW’s wishing to make a withdrawal are welcome.

  • Joe Max
    July 29, 2016 at 12:27 pm

    Far from brilliant, begging ‘The Man ” for free money. Am sure since they’ve checked the magic box, they know how to get the cash. EBT cards, educational grants, loans, affirmative action, etc. Online hustlers, many with fake backgrounds too. Nobody knows who they really are, one can imagine what the game consists of. Everyone and their mothers of all races. Will be doing this, for extra-cash in their parasite-loser pockets !

    • JenB
      July 29, 2016 at 8:06 pm

      Wouldn’t it be nice if the moochers exerted the same amount of energy on actual work as they do getting free shit?

  • Bubba Kincade
    July 29, 2016 at 12:21 pm

    This is a good idea. If all y’all white people would give Bubba 78% of everything you have I will forgive you for enslaving me for 7 years. Please just make your checks out to Bubba James Kincade, you will be for giving. Thank you for your cooperation in this endeavor.

    • woodsman
      July 29, 2016 at 10:26 pm

      bend over ill give u something bubba the love sponge.

  • Chris From Georgia
    July 29, 2016 at 12:04 pm

    My ancestors never owned any slaves. No reparations from me!!!

    • KJDS
      July 29, 2016 at 12:38 pm

      Mine either, but I’m white, so I MUST be guilty of something – everybody says so!

      • wabbitt
        July 30, 2016 at 11:13 am

        My family didn’t come to this country until 50 years after slavery was outlawed. But I’m white – so I better pony up some cash!

  • Trigga T
    July 29, 2016 at 11:37 am

    Yo’ Fiesty do a brotha a fava, I wantz a pistol and some crack! You owes it.

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      July 29, 2016 at 11:52 am

      What?? Lol… Why in the world would I have a PISTOL? Anyway, Crack I gots.

  • JoeMomma
    July 29, 2016 at 11:35 am

    Can I get reparations on all of my tax dollars that have been given away to people who refuse to work?

  • FiestyLawyerLady
    July 29, 2016 at 11:20 am

    Wonderful. Today I’m going to walk around as black face and request people come to my home and help with the laundry and the stubborn shit stain my husband left in the toilet before work this morning. It’s soaking in Lysol right now so all they have to do is scrub. I’ve done half the work already.

    • FeistySux
      July 29, 2016 at 11:55 am

      So classy, as usual.

      • FiestyLawyerLady
        July 29, 2016 at 11:59 am

        I’m as classy as a box of wine baby!

      • Feistysux sucks
        July 29, 2016 at 12:26 pm

        … Hey feisty sux… I’m just curious… Where do you normally spend your time online? Do you look at pictures of kittens and rub your little forearms till they bleed? How is it that you can get so offended by someone you don’t even know? Over a comment that has nothing to do with you? Do yourself a favor and swallow some bleach. Clean out those insides. Life’s too short, and obviously yours needs to be shorter.

        • FeistySux
          July 29, 2016 at 12:34 pm

          It’s unfortunate that this blog has become exactly what the naysayers have been accusing it of being. I miss the intelligence and investigative nature of the blogs it used to have. Now they just troll the internet looking for idiots to make fun of. And they’re always either white SJW’s, panhandlers or minorities. Oh, and women with – god forbid – short hair!

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 29, 2016 at 12:48 pm

            Really? If this blog offends you that much why even come here to read it? Things can’t be serious on here for every article. It’s quite the diverse blog with just the right amount of humor if you ask me. Perhaps you would be better fit for the T&G or some other faux news source that has writers who drink tea, with pinky in air.

          • FeistySux
            July 29, 2016 at 1:14 pm

            Oh, I’m not offended, just disappointed. Maybe the writers are taking the summer off and that’s why we’re getting the crap that’s on here now. And most of the more intelligent and thoughtful commentators seem to have left as well. Skeptical? Are you still there?

  • ProfessorM
    July 29, 2016 at 11:15 am

    Okay so wait one god damn minute…. I’m supposed to give something to you just because you are black and I am white? Get the fuck out of here! And this is for real? There has got to be a thesis about failed social ideas in here somewhere. Okay… As of today… I am now identifying as a person of color. I want some free things to. God damn it!

    • ProfessorM
      July 29, 2016 at 11:16 am

      Too’ whoops… Fell for my own pet peeve…lol

  • Lit
    July 29, 2016 at 11:00 am

    A cabin in the woods? Black people don’t go to the woods. They don’t like that camping shit.

  • Uncle Tom
    July 29, 2016 at 10:48 am

    If you aint helpin then you aint got no inteligense!

  • Felix
    July 29, 2016 at 10:44 am

    I’d like to be President of the United…….. oh shit one brotha already got that hand out!

  • Dom
    July 29, 2016 at 10:31 am

    So essentially this is nothing more than virtual pan handling that is segregated by race.

  • KJDS
    July 29, 2016 at 10:17 am

    Brilliant!!!

  • ItsAllABadDream
    July 29, 2016 at 10:15 am

    I bet no white people sign up to do this. Because it would actually cost them something. As opposed to their social media posts about how they’re the “good ones” which doesn’t cost them anything.

    Because when you get right down to it SJW’s are full of shit and will never put their money where their mouths are.

    • Bubba Kincade
      July 29, 2016 at 12:25 pm

      I would settle for free KFC, foe da rest of my life.

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