Nudniks

Too Fast, Too Furious Peabody Throttle Jockey Races His Wannabe BMW M3 On I-95 In Boxford; Crashes, Kills Himself, Almost Kills 4 Others, Including 12-Year-Old Girl

Stick-on vents and decals from AutoZone may give you +5 horsepower a piece, but they can’t help you keep control of your vehicle.

4ba27317-991b-4352-b70d-f489eadcfdef (1)

Get the newest Turtleboy Sports t-shirt (as seen on the Felger and Mazz show) by clicking the picture above.

Get the newest Turtleboy Sports t-shirt (as seen on the Felger and Mazz show) by clicking the picture above.

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Screen Shot 2017-02-01 at 10.32.58 AM

 

 

 

 

SOURCE: “Authorities believe that drag racing on the southbound side of Interstate 95 Saturday night was the cause of the fatal crash.

State Police said Michael Espinola, 38, was racing southbound when he crossed into oncoming traffic. That’s when his BMW convertible ran head-on into an Acura MDX and a Honda Civic.

A 64-year-old man and woman from North Hampton, New Hampshire were in the Acura. A 43-year-old woman and her 12-year-old passenger were in the Honda. The four were injured in the crash and taken to a local hospital with non-life-threatening injuries.”

I know a lot of little boys have dreams of being an accomplished racecar driver when they grow up; fortunately, the vast majority realize it is not exactly feasible and stick to weekend track days to fulfill their need for speed responsibly. In this instance, a 38-year-old nudnik named Mike Espinola couldn’t keep his lead foot in check in his 1997 BMW 3-Series wannabe M3.

ME3

Replica wheels, stick on vents from AutoZone, the bandana, and bottoms that don’t know whether they want to be highwaters or shorts. Definitely looks responsible and not like the kind of nudnik who would street race.

State Police received reports of 2 vehicles drag racing along I-95 in Boxford Saturday evening shortly before the crash. Mike lost control of his 20-year-old BMW near exit 53, somehow crossed onto the opposite side of the highway, and crashed head-on into not one but TWO vehicles, a Honda and an Acura. In one of those vehicles was a 12-year-old girl. Mike was pronounced dead at the scene, and I gotta tell you – I have not an ounce of sympathy for this guy. I know he’s dead and it’s not the kindest thing to speak ill of those who’ve passed on, but, he could have taken an innocent little girl with her whole life ahead of her with him, along with the three others involved, for no reason other than to try to show some other asshole on the road his dick was bigger by going faster.

ME4

Word on the street is, those M Sport stripes add 15 horsepower and plant the front end better than a control arm upgrade.

Of course, now we have the grieving family on TV, in disbelief, screaming “He din du nuffin!” Mike’s stepson, Alec Olson, had a lot to say on the matter:

“He was the kind of guy who would give you his shirt,” Olson said.

He says if his stepfather was racing, he wants to see the evidence.

“If he was racing, who is the person he was racing? You know, what is the license number? What’s the make of the car? What’s the color of the car?  All that, where’s all that” Olson said.

“Personally I don’t think he was racing. But reconstruction, state police. We’ll see what it comes down to,” Olson said.

I can agree with Alec’s sentiment of wanting to know about the other car involved, because that fucking dingleberry should be charged and held responsible for their hand in this. It takes two to tango and they’re just as responsible as Mike is, although Mike paid handsomely for his stupidity – play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

Now, about Mike being a good guy…

ME5

Looks like he did give someone his shirt after all! This pic screams ‘pillar of the community,’ no?

 

Turns out, Mike also has quite a history:

 

Check forgery – seems like he has a penchant for misrepresenting things aside from his car.

ME2

And then this gem:

ME1

Breaking and entering in the daytime, larceny… stand up guy.

ME6 ME9

Looks like he used to hang with a bunch of winners, too. Doesn’t look like they’d be the kind of friends to encourage bad behavior.

ME10

Nope, not at all.

 

Mike was always busy posing for the Facebook machine, bragging about his “baller status” what with his ‘replica’ M3, (likely) fake Cuban cigars, bottles of Johnny Walker Blue Label, and his fake Rolex.

ME7

Good on you Heather calling this chucklefuck out on his Chinatown Faux-lex. If more people had called him out on his egotistical behavior, maybe he wouldn’t have ended up like a can of creamed corn sprayed across the dash of his retro Ultimate Crashing Machine.

 

Aside from almost taking innocent lives along with him in his douchecapades, the sad part in this is Mike leaves behind a wife and children because of his selfish, destructive behavior. They will forever be burdened with his loss because he couldn’t fucking control himself (or his car, for that matter) be a decent human being and NOT race on public roadways where innocent people are simply trying to get where they’re going. It’s not like family and friends didn’t see this coming, though. Friends have commented about Mike’s driving “skills” (better said: lack thereof) on Facebook before. It was a pattern with this guy, and no one cared enough to speak up.

ME8

Mike was an adult, though, and ultimately, he and only he is responsible for his untimely demise. There is no excuse for reckless behavior when you’re a parent; if you have children you hang it up, you keep yourself safe so you can be there for them, to guide them, to raise them – they rely on you for EVERYTHING. This jackwad caused his family irreparable harm because his delusions of grandeur rendered him too big for his britches and that is unforgivable in my book. I feel for them, just as I feel for the victims in the other vehicles involved. Hopefully, this serves as a reminder to people that you are not invincible, especially when you’re barreling down the road at excessive speeds in a 3,500lb. slab of steel. Slow it down, bros. Save it for the track, that way you can actually have a record of your car being badass as opposed to anecdotes of smoking people between red lights just to fluff your ego.

Have the need for speed but don’t know where to scratch your itch? Find your nearest track here. Drive responsibly, Turtleriders!

 

 

 

 

We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.

Screen Shot 2017-03-31 at 2.17.19 PM

4ba27317-991b-4352-b70d-f489eadcfdef (1)

screen-shot-2016-12-05-at-8-36-43-pm

Screen Shot 2017-02-01 at 10.32.58 AM

Screen Shot 2015-12-28 at 1.20.12 PM

Screen Shot 2015-12-01 at 10.29.56 AM

4ba27317-991b-4352-b70d-f489eadcfdef (1)

Screen Shot 2017-02-27 at 10.14.48 AM

Screen Shot 2017-03-25 at 8.48.23 PM

46 Comment(s)
  • July 19, 2017 at 7:42 am

    Please keep sharing such things in the future too as it truly be a focus for the visitors. I really want to be thankful for the way you have put it here.

  • AJ
    April 14, 2017 at 5:32 pm

    Hey. I get this looks like a bad decision gone horribly wrong, but maybe, for the sake of this man’s family and friends, wait till he’s at least buried before you start bashing him online?

    And while you’re on the topic of the kind of person, or husband, or father he was, maybe you could clean up you trash language during your ‘journalistic endevour.’ You, yourself, sound like the biggest piece of trash ever! Real nice language you use to describe this person in the same article that you’re discussing his mourning son.
    You should be ashamed of yourself.

    Furthermore, who dare you judge or attack friends of his from Facebook photos?!
    I know a few of those guys personally and they’re pretty stand up people.

    I guess some people don’t have any social cooth. You clearly must need some internet platform to rant from because no one wants to listen to you personally. You should keep that in mind before speaking out of turn. Make a note of that for next time.

  • Raymond
    April 14, 2017 at 12:23 pm

    Hey fuckers, this was a human being. We’ve all made shitty choices before, can any of you cunts look me in the eye and tell me you’ve NEVER put yourself and others at risk in a single point in your life? He made a mistake, and he paid the ultimate price for it, leave it the fuck alone.

    By the way, I met Mike at a car wash and we talked for 2+ hours. He was a nice guy and a good man, and he made a bad choice, just like we all do from time to time. Rest in peace brother.

  • Michelle Ann valasunas
    April 12, 2017 at 10:26 pm

    I am so diSgusted by this. Regardless of anyone past present record morals whatever there is never a time where it is respectful to speak negatively about someone who has passed. Time and place for everything. You should keep your opinions to yourself and let the people friends/family mourn over the loss of a human being.
    I am not a judge mental person but I judging the fuck out of you. You’re trying to put the deceased in blast?? Anyone that would agree or give u praise based on what u have said is disgusting. I am ashamed for you. Shut your fucking mouth and respect the dead.

    • Eugene Field
      April 14, 2017 at 12:33 am

      “respect the dead.”
      I am sorry he died.

      Now, how about respecting the living…by not drag racing and causing three other cars to wreak (2 in the accident, 1 in a crash caused by the backup), IF that is what happened.

  • Maria
    April 11, 2017 at 5:44 pm

    Turtle boy shut the hell up and know your roll. Worry about your life and let this family grieve in peace. People should remember their love ones with good memories and not the bad ones but looks like Turtle boy gets off on other people’s misery cuz his life has no good memories for what I can read about his daughter. So I guess he needs to point out others faults to hide what’s going on in his closet. Take care of yours and leave others alone loser!!!

  • heath
    April 11, 2017 at 5:26 pm

    you are all a bunch of disrespectful pieces of shit that was my friend regardless of his past people change and do the right thing and at times make bad choices no one’s perfect the person writing this shit don’t even know him but casts judgement on him on his past and fb pics don’t matter how someone looks or there past he was a great guy it sucks things ended the way it did for everyone involved but there is no need to talk shit about someone who passed away and his grieving family the person writing this and anyone who commented shit on this should all go kill yourself

    • Eugene Field
      April 14, 2017 at 12:30 am

      “casts judgement” – So, if investigation proves he WAS drag racing, are you apologists going to come back here and admit you were wrong?

  • Josue
    April 11, 2017 at 3:33 pm

    If you put your effort into real shit in life instead of talking shit online you probably get somewhere. Get a real job you fucking BUM!!

  • Dina
    April 11, 2017 at 12:48 pm

    Whoever is behind this blog, I am asking you to have respect for the family. He does leave behind a child and the last thing she should do is stumble across this horrific blog that you have created. Please be kind enough to remove this entire blog and all the comments. I am asking you from the bottom of my heart and hope that you can respect his grieving family’s privacy. Please

    • Woodrow Wilson
      April 11, 2017 at 2:42 pm

      Dina, the best way to go about getting a blog removed is to go on their facebook page and send them a direct message. Usually, you’ll get Abi, the desk girl. She had a vicious blog written about her a while back and got it removed and got a job with them. She can get the information and ask the higher ups to authorize removal. Just go there and tell them what you said here. They don’t really look at the comments. Good luck.

      • Dina
        April 11, 2017 at 3:31 pm

        Thank you Woodrow Wilson, I already tried that and unfortunately who ever is behind this horrible blog will not remove it.

    • Eugene Field
      April 14, 2017 at 12:27 am

      Why not have it be a cautionary tale?
      I think the privacy aspect went down the tubes when the accident occurred.

  • DINA
    April 11, 2017 at 10:04 am

    You people are a disgrace to this world for posting all of this. To whomever published this: Where you there at the time of the incident? Maybe it was you in the other vehicle that was racing? Maybe it was you that hit him and caused the accident? Either way you should really keep your comments and assumptions to yourself. Any low life that liked this article is as arrogant as you!
    I highly recommend this is removed or I will be filing charges for SLANDER and COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT as I have all these above photos registered with the U.S Copyright Office. Get a dictionary if you do not know what all that means, since it is very clear you lack in the intelligence department.
    Have respect for his family and friends. People have a right to their own opinion, BUT KEEP IT TO YOUR FU***** SELF! You have no idea the person he was and you have way to much time on your hands. Why not go back to school and finally get yourself an education for your dream that clearly you never fulfilled. I heard channel 2 news is hiring.

    • ABC, 123
      April 11, 2017 at 10:19 am

      1. Slander is oral, not written, maybe YOU should get the dictionary, try looking up libel.
      2. Copyrighted photos…….highly doubt it.
      3. Richard N. Vulva Esq. will gladly take the case.

      • BEAT DOWN
        April 11, 2017 at 10:27 am

        Oh now your ABC, 123
        Maybe you should change your screen name to PUSSY since you can only hide in your room of your parents basement and type away on the computer. What are you trying to accomplish here? Clearly you couldn’t get a job at Facebook they turned you down so you go open this shit.
        Let’s talk about your family problems. I’m sure you have many! Let me please be the one to write an article on your life!

        • Uncle "Beat Down" Paul
          April 11, 2017 at 10:35 am

          I just hope they don’t find out about what we did under the front porch stoop. You were such a good little boy. You love it when I blew bubbles on your little tummy. Burrrt, burrrt… I painted my testicle balls like little soccer balls and played “Header practice”. You never tattled though. I was the one that gave you that nickname. Beat Down. That’s what we called it when you would fight with your little weeny in front of my NAMBLA friends. You loved wearing your little soccer uniform and doing the peeny dance for the older gentlemen.

          • RIP MIKEY. WE LOVE YOU PAL
            April 11, 2017 at 11:22 am

            You wrote that so well. Sounds like you were typing from experience. Like, maybe you were in a comfortable place in your brain. A place you go that makes you smile and feel good inside. I feel like you may have even had your eyes closed as you reminisced of your younger days. And, I graduated on all levels. Just in case you were wondering shit stain. Oh, and Mikey only loved women. He had a beautiful wife (prob more than we can say for you) that was solid to him so I guess he must’ve been doing something right. Unlike yours who probably catches some side “D” every chance she gets to make up for the lack of fulfillment you provide her.

          • Uncle "Beat Down" Paul
            April 11, 2017 at 11:34 am

            It was from experience. Beat Down, Mikey, Little Opie, Jimmie, Chipper… We all had lots of fun together. They’d say, “Uncle Paul, let’s play frickle frackle…” And, we’d go under the porch stoop and the good little eggs would do their peeny dance for me. They were good little boys. Not tattlers. Mikey would give Jimmie little kisses on the dangley bag until the time he found a hair growing there and punched him in the ribs. Mikey liked um hairless and smooth. Suuurrre.

  • whatevuh
    WHATEVUH
    April 11, 2017 at 7:38 am

    He probably had a hardon showing how fast his little ‘beamer’ could go. I see it every fucking day. Incidentally, chapter 3 in the owners manual is “How To Drive Like An Asshole” Dick ain’t so big now is it?

    • Papo-seco
      April 11, 2017 at 7:53 am

      Probably still bigger than yours. And I think you spelled “whatever” wrong you illiterate fuck. You have to be a special kinda stupid to do that even with spellcheck.

    • BEAT DOWN
      April 11, 2017 at 10:20 am

      TO: WHATEVUH

      By the way you write, it looks like you never went to school. I apologize for the lack of parenting you received. SORRY, BUT NOT SORRY!
      I don’t know how you can call him a dick when you do not know him and hide behind a screen name of Whatevuh? Come out from behind your keyboard and I will slap you with my dick and show you are real man!!! You looser pussy!

      • Beat this
        April 11, 2017 at 10:30 am

        You like touching boys with your dick, huh? Feels special to just have another boy touch it. It’s just a bonus if it doesn’t smell like rotten linguica afterwards.

        Someone who graduated 4th grade would know the difference between looser and loser. As in, “Beat Down was surprised that his Mom’s pussy was looser than his rectum. Especially after that loser Mikey stretched his ass all out.” See? Spelling matters! Sorry, not sorry…

      • whatevuh
        WHATEVUH
        April 12, 2017 at 6:46 am

        Sorry, but I won’t be around the areas you inhabit . . . and keep your little Portuguese penis away from me faggot

    • SCOTT STEAD
      April 11, 2017 at 11:00 pm

      Whatevah, you and your little turtle friend will have to come out of your shell sooner or later and we will be waiting for you! Turtle boy you fucked up running your mouth there are ways of finding out who you are.. Sorry mommy picked on you and daddy showed you no attention.. DONT FUCK WITH PEABODY

      • Jafreese
        April 11, 2017 at 11:40 pm

        Ya kid better not fuck with Peabody or I’ll grab some large beefs with extra sauce at Bill n Bobs and at least 2 guys named Bettencourt and we’ll come get ya

  • Dick
    April 11, 2017 at 12:03 am

    Listen please stop speaking of him like that regardless of someone’s pass people do change and he did he worked very hard, you say your a compassionate person then act like it just as u said he did leave behind a wife and kids and they prob would not want to keep reading stories like this, if you really are suitable new outlet/media then act and write proffeaional, bashing someone when their not here is far from being professional, I understand you are trying to raise some kind of awareness with this but only speaking negative about someone is not the way you do it,let me guess you closet is cleanyou have nothing hidden in there right, b’s a big ba we are all worried and caring about those families involved in this especially when they were just innocent in this tragic event but please stop the bashing and let that man rest in oeace

    • Dick
      April 11, 2017 at 12:06 am

      You fucking nagger bunch if you had anyballd you the person who wrote this would meet me and I would also you so hard right across your faggott face

      • Papo-seco
        April 11, 2017 at 7:48 am

        He’s a fucking coward hanging/hiding behind a keyboard. A keyboard warrior. He wouldn’t have the sack to say it in front of Mikey or his friends. He might catch a quick soccer kick to the fuckin face. Homo. And what news outlet is this? I’ve never heard of them or this group ever in my life. He talks about a poor little girl in the article, and then makes fun of a boy who’s feeling hurt/sobbing because he just lost Mikey. Smh! Like I said, you wouldn’t say it to, or meet up with any of his real friends to express your opinions and let us express ours. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Faggot. Suck a dick. You and your readers that talk shit. Thumbs down this one you maggot.

      • love not war
        April 11, 2017 at 3:22 pm

        The person hiding behind the computer is Aidan Kearney 2 Foster st Worcester, MA
        413-262-6909

        • on it's back
          June 6, 2017 at 1:51 pm

          I don’t care who you are that’s fucking funny!!!!!!!!!!

  • Frankie L.
    April 10, 2017 at 9:30 pm

    WOW! What an article, and comments from you and readers about someone they don’t even know. I understand SOME of your frustrations with the little girl involved, BUT I can assure you he wasn’t trying to hurt anyone including himself. After all, he paid the ultimate price. He wasn’t a drag-racer as some are calling him. As a matter of fact, he never raced. Maybe, he just felt good in his car that night, pushed it a little more than he should’ve, got a little out of control, and lost control. I’m sure no one here has ever done that before, right? As far as his car, he bought it in 06, and at the time it only had 37K miles on a 1 owner car. Nice car. He knew it wasn’t an M. Everyone in his area knew it, as he was very well liked. Funny how people are quick to judge someone they don’t know. But hey, that’s the society we live in today. Everyone is more superior/better/smarter, everyone knows everything, and everyone knows better. Let’s not pretend everyone on here including the writer of the article has never done anything crazy, or pushed the envelope on anything. It’s always easier to critique someone else tho. Everyone’s entitled to their opinion, and I read yours loud and clear. Just remember he has family that love him, and know who he really was unlike you folks. A solid kid who loved his family. That might not mean anything to a lot of people, but it did to him and the people that love him. His family is made up of some very respectful, law abiding citizens who have feelings though, and maybe this article pushes the limits with its opinions. You sound like you’re trying to yell at, or scold someone that can’t read your article. He’s gone pal. You can do whatever you’d like, and write whatever you want. It’s your blog/site or whatever you call it, but think about if it were your family. Nice people who had to read this article trashing their only son, cousin, wife, daughter. Regardless of your opinion, they STILL love him. What if 1 time when YOU pushed the envelope things hadn’t turned out so smoothe? Would you want all that shit talking. I’m sure people would find shit to talk. They always seem too as you can see. Anyway, that’s my take. You shouldn’t be so quick to judge. I thought the article, and heading was disgusting. I can understand some of your points about speeding, and putting the public in danger, BUT you could’ve drawn something up that was a little less trashy. Have a good night Turtle-Head Poking Crew.

    • Just Sayin'
      April 11, 2017 at 5:28 pm

      Well said

  • True Reality Speaks
    True Reality Speaks
    April 10, 2017 at 9:11 pm

    Darwin racks up another win for his theory on evolution. Only surprise is that he wasn’t riding a motorcycle.

    Wonder if Darwin ever made the connection between small dicks and self-extinction? What did that sub-species do back in those days – challenge people to duels?

  • Turd Burglestein
    April 10, 2017 at 5:09 pm

    I seriously doubt he had a real M. I’ve been a BMW fanatic for years and I see so many people get the badges and stickers on ebay and tell everyone they have a M. It’s the equivalence of sticking a roll of silver dollars in your pocket.

    • Madcow not Rachel
      April 10, 2017 at 5:19 pm

      Probably a 1/2 roll of dimes in this douchenozzles case. Good riddance to bad trash.

      • BigP
        April 10, 2017 at 9:17 pm

        Wow mike passed yesterday. This little pussy auther is the one with a shrimp dick I can’t wait to find you. BFG BEAT DOWN TIME

        • The Poop Hole Loophole
          April 12, 2017 at 9:13 pm

          Auther? Go to school. You dope!

  • John Galt
    April 10, 2017 at 3:22 pm

    It is very common in such subcultures that one’s car is camouflage for a small penis.

    • TIA JUANA
      April 11, 2017 at 10:12 am

      JOHN GALT:

      I believe your mother found your penis last night in her esophagus! You may want to get it. I believe you only have 24 hrs to save it and reattach it.

  • azifell99
    Azif
    April 10, 2017 at 3:18 pm

    Probably shouldn’t have been wearing those sunglasses at night.

  • Eliminated
    April 10, 2017 at 3:06 pm

    Pushing 40, hanging with kids, adolescent brain obviously. Sad part he seriously injured innocent people. Poseur too, not if something serious will happen, it’s when and it did sadly.

  • Jafreese
    April 10, 2017 at 2:38 pm

    I’ll say it. Good riddance.

    • DINA
      April 11, 2017 at 10:05 am

      I’ll say it! GOOD RIDDANCE WHEN YOU PASS AWAY!

    • TIAMARIA
      April 11, 2017 at 10:06 am

      JAFREESE:

      I’ll say it! GOOD RIDDANCE WHEN YOU PASS AWAY ALSO!

      • Jafreese
        April 11, 2017 at 11:26 pm

        Oh yeah? Well the jerk store called, and they’re running out of you

Comment on this Post

*

RELATED POSTS
Nostalgic Facebook Commentators Are Really Pissed Off About Snow Days For Kids
Guy Who Tried Hiding In Tree To Flee Cops on I-290 Earns Moron of the Week Award
Auburn Fan Who Refused To Bet On Florida State Loses Chance To Win Free $25,000 Is Giant Moron