Sports

Toronto Blue Jays’ Jose Bautista Just Followed Me On Twitter Because Apparently He Wants To Ride The Magical Turtle

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So I got excited today when I got a notification on my phone and found out that Toronto Blue Jays superstar Jose Bautista is now following me on Twitter:

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Turns out this guy is just a giant weirdo who follows random people because he’s trying to win a contest. MLB has some moronic thing called the “Face of Baseball” which is this tournament to see which player is the most mentioned on Twitter. Apparently his plan was to follow as many strangers as possible and beg them to follow him in return. Then he asks you to retweet him as much as possible:

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This is an actual thing professional athletes do now.

But here’s the thing – the tournament ended a while ago. Joey Bats made the final four, beating Derek Jeter along the way before eventually losing to some guy named Eric Sogaro. Never heard of him, but apparently he’s real important:

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With that said he has nothing to gain from following me right? This can only lead me to the conclusion that 1) he knows I’m going to Toronto tomorrow, and 2) he knows where the hottest takes in North America come from and he wants in on that sweet Turtleboy nectar.

Happy to have you aboard the magical turtle Jose.

aqbho

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