Smiles And Sunshine

Turtleboy’s Top 100 Most Popular Blogs Of The Year: #100-91

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Our Facebook page is suspended again, so make sure you to LIKE THE LOST BOYS OF TURTLE Facebook page to keep up with our latest blogs.

 

 

 

 

 

What a year it’s been for Turtleboy Sports. Over 20 million page views and counting. We started the year with about 21,000 Facebook followers. And despite three separate 30 day suspensions that number has doubled to 42,000. We’ve also got two backup pages with over 10,000 followers each when our primary pages are suspended. We’ve been featured on every major radio station in the Boston, Worcester, and Springfield areas, linked by major media outlets, and widely recognized as the only reliable media outlet in Massachusetts. We are an unstoppable force of nature, and we will not be defeated.

So what is Turtleboy Sports? We get that question a lot. Are we a news outlet or entertainment? The answer is, both. We’ve broken some major stories this year.

  • We were the first media outlet to report the name of the man (Jorge Zambrano) who killed Officer Ronald Tarentino.
  • We were the first to announce when he was killed.
  • We broke the story about the corrupt daughter of a retired judge who continued to work in the probation department despite giving up names of informants to her criminal friends, and dating the brother of the cop killer.
  • We were relentless in our coverage with the Spencer-East Brookfield schools, which culminated in a peaceful overthrow of School Committee chairman Kevin Hayes.
  • We dug and we dug and we dug until we found proof that Mosaic Cultural Complex was paying its employees to do NOTHING, which forced the City Council to finally cut off funding for the fraudulent non-profit.

We also broke a buttload of other stories as well. But at the same time, Turtleboy lives to entertain. This is why you come here. And we do that by shaming people who have earned the shaming. Because sometimes people just wanna have a good ol’ fashioned laugh. Lots of people don’t like this because for years we’ve let them control the narrative. But not any more. From now on when you act like a fool in public, you will be publicly exposed by the Turtle.

With that said, it’s time to look back at the year in Turtleboy. We will be releasing our top 100 most popular blogs, 10 blogs at a time, so you can catch up on the debauchery. Each blog will be explained briefly with a limerick. We understand that many turtle riders jumped on mid stroke, so this gives you an opportunity to catch up on what you missed……

 

100. Mambo Drinks 100 person brawl – 18,561 page views

Roses are red

Violets are blue

If you like a big fat ass

Then Mambo Drink is for you

100 Person Brawls On Water Street Will Always Happen As Long As Mambo Drinks Continues To Be A Dooshnozzle Magnet

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99. Ron Tarentino’s kid surprises his Mom by coming from from Fort Bragg dressed in his high school football uniform – 18,578 page views

Roses are red 

Some chicks are bi

Colin Kaepernick is a bitch

But this made us cry

Hey Colin Kaepernick, Ron Tarentino’s Son Returning From Fort Bragg In Full Pads To Surprise His Mom At Auburn-Leicester Football Game Is What America Is Really About

Hey Colin Kaepernick, Ron Tarentino’s Son Returning From Fort Bragg In Full Pads To Surprise His Mom At Auburn-Leicester Football Game Is What America Is Really About

 

98. Twenty State Senators vote against funding for bulletproof vests for police officers on the day of Ron Tarentino’s wake – 18,726 page views

The death of an officer

Left plenty of blame

These 20 Senators 

Should bow their heads in shame

20 State Senators Voted Against Money For Bullet Proof Vests Day Before Ron Tarentino Will Be Buried

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97. Liz Costa’s Bootleg GoFundMe – 18,763 page views

When DCF takes your kids

Cuz you can’t stay clean

And you start a GoFundMe

You’re a grimy trap queen

Marlboro GoFundMe Trap Queen Raising $10K To Get Back Custody Of 4 Kids She Lost Due To 27 Charges Of Neglect

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96. Jerell Sciarra exposed – 18,938 page views

Somehow this ogre

Is still in high school

He thinks he’s a bad ass

But he’s really a tool

Meet Jerell Sciarra – The Auburn High School Savage Who Viciously Attacked And Beat Another Student In School On Camera

 

95. Dumb parents sue school for disciplining their kid – 19,015 page views

When your kid goes nuts

And gets a timeout

You should probably quit bitching

And chill the fuck out

Moronic Turner Falls Parents Of Dangerous Kids Who Intentionally Hurt Themselves In “Calm Down Room” Are Suing Elementary School

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94. Top 5 Biggest Dump towns in Rhode Island – 19,063 views

Pawtucket’s a dump

Cohasett sucks balls

But nothing compares

To that shithole Central Falls

Top 5 Dumpiest Cities And Towns In Rhode Island

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93. Coach pretends to be a kid and plays against kids in football game – 19,098 page views

His team was getting beat

So he jumped in the game

But the kids still beat his ass

And the result was the same

18 Year Old Youth Football Coach With Ghetto Man Bun Puts On Pads, Tries Hurting Kids, Sucks, Gets Caught, Does Walk Of Shame Because His Team Was Losing

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92. Grafton Hill hoodrats react after one gets arrested with gun – 19,187 page views

Hoodrats are hoodrats

They think guns are a toy

And when they nab one on G Hill

They scream “free my boi”

Arrest Of 17 Year Old With Gun On Grafton Hill Leads To Legendary Facebook Commentary From Worcester’s Finest

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91. Spencer trashbag tells Spencer Police she will not be helping them catch her criminal friend –  19,270 page views

Some people are dumb

But it doesn’t get much denser

Than a failed liquor store robber

And a ratchet from Spencer

Spencer Hoodrat Posts On SPD Facebook Page That She Knows Who Robbed Liquor Store But Isn’t Telling Cuz He Was Just “Tryna Get Drunk”

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2 Comment(s)
  • Pistasheo
    December 28, 2016 at 3:17 pm

    I demand MOAR!!!! this is such a tease!

  • Turd Burglestein
    December 28, 2016 at 1:48 pm

    Firsties!! Just so you know I was in a car accident! Now I have nerve damage and have to smoke pot and heroin all day for the pain. That’s why I can’t get a job.

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