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Worcester Corn-Fed Lummox And Worcester State GF Put On Worst Acting Performance Ever On Jerry Springer Dominatrix Episode

Worcester Corn-Fed Lummox And Worcester State GF Put On Worst Acting Performance Ever On Jerry Springer Dominatrix Episode

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I have a confession to make – I didn’t realize Jerry Springer was fake until a couple months ago. I really thought these gutterslugs and meatnuggets beat the shit out of each other in an authentic rage of passion. But yesterday a woman from Worcester State, and her 30 year old Worcester crisco magnet of a boyfriend were the stars of the show. Basically the girl goes through his phone and finds a bunch of dominatrix porn. She deletes the pics, but the next day they’re right back on. Because so many people don’t realize that when you delete pics on an iPhone they don’t get erased. You have to go to your trash album and delete them again. Finally butterball comes out and tells his girlfriend that he’s leaving her for a 300 pound tranny dominatrix. And it was by far the worst acting I’ve ever seen.

They’re not even trying anymore.

First of all, how’d you like to be this chick’s roommate at Worcester State? You’re trying to party and enjoy your youth, maybe bang a couple dudes on the baseball team. And every day you have to come home to this:

I’d drop out. Because you know he’s the kind of guy that eats your food in fridge and then plays dumb afterwards. And there’s 99% chance that he has clogged up the toilet on more than one occasion. It’s just a fucked up position to put your roommates in. Everyone knows that the second girls get in the privacy of their home they start ripping ass and taking gigantic smashes. But you can’t do that freely if this chudstuffer is sitting on the couch watching cartoons.

Secondly, what are their names? Someone has to know who they are. Please send it to us. Because if you sign up to go on the Jerry Springer show and air shit like this, it’s simply a miracle that you haven’t come up on our radar by now.

Finally the corn-fed lummox comes out, and some of the worst acting ever recorded on television begins to transpire.

Her: So, are you gonna be in a relationship with me and delete all the pictures you have on your phone?

Him: Nope. 

Her: Why not? Am I not good enough?

Him: You’re not.

Her: But you said you loved me and wanted to make a family with me. You really wouldn’t?

Him: Nope. 

Her: Alright. 

Come on now. I know it’s not real, but you should at least sell it better than that. Doesn’t Jerry have standards for actors and actresses anymore? You can’t just take two Worcester plow donkeys, give them a script, and then not give them acting lessons before the show.

His commentary was so Worcester it hurts:

Jerry: So why were you with her then?

Him: Because I thought she was fun. She’s in college. She’s what ever guy dreams about ya know? A college girl in college. Wet t-shirt classes, the whole nine yards. 

It’s true. My favorite kind of college girls are the ones who are in college. Especially the ones majoring in wet t-shirt classes. There’s a 99.9% chance this guy watches UFC at the bar and regularly order Freshway Pizza too.

Unfortunately she was not interested in the wet t-shirt classes, because as she puts it, “I wanna start a life for myself, and get money.” And what better way to get your resume out there than by airing your dirty dominatrix laundry on the Jerry Springer show?

As Jerry pointed out, it still doesn’t explain why he’d stay with her for two years. So Jerry asked him, and the jellyhoss totally froze up and forgot his line:

So she stepped in and cued him up:

Her: So you’re just using me basically?

Him: Basically, yes. 

And as you can see, she was shocked:

After that she “found out” that he had a dominatrix girlfriend named Sin who he was running away with. Because as he pointed out, his girlfriend doesn’t get dressed up sexy for him like she used to. And this man right here clearly deserves a woman who dresses up sexy for him:

After all, he keeps himself in such great shape, so women should be doing whatever it takes to give him a Kelley Square pants tent. Sure, he’s a 30 year old man who still pops his collar, has apparently run out of Clearasil, and has a ginger chin strap. But make no doubt about – he has earned the right to be picky.

She pointed out that he doesn’t come on to her, and he gave a classic Worcester answer:

I mean, but I like the whips and chains and everything else bettahhhhh. So I mean, I dunno.”

Once again, her acting skills after he dropped this bombshell on her were impeccable:

Finally Sin makes her grand appearance:

Yea, that’s a dude. My question is, where are these dominatrix clubs in Worcester? Asking for a friend. Are they in the backroom at Sweaty Betty’s? Or do you have to go a Vernon Hill apartment and meet up with some shadeballs from Craig’s List?

Anyway, once again this chick’s acting skills were off the charts when she allegedly found out that he’s been sticking his balogna baton somewhere in those rolls while being whipped like a thoroughbred:

So you met her at this dominatrix club? Are you kidding me?”

I’ve seen realer things on CNN.

After the dominatrix called her a prude it was time for the choreographed slap:

After that they awkwardly trade insults back and forth while pretending to be angry with each other. The best is when the dominatrix says, “He just likes this more,” and the camera pans over to him:

That right there is the face of a man who is 50/50 on the prospect of shoving a live gerbil up his ass.

The best is how she acts like she’s somehow above the tranny dominatrix. “I have a career going for myself.” Bitch, you just graduated from Worcester State with a degree in gender studies and now the first thing that comes up when people Google you is gonna be your guest appearance on Jerry Springer. Yea, that will really open some doors for you.

Anyway, back in my day the people on Jerry Springer might’ve been acting, but at least they sold it. This was just a shitty effort all around for a bunch of people who wanted a free night’s stay in a hotel in Connecticut. The bottom line is, we need a name. Give us a name!!

 

 

 

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5 Comment(s)
  • Jen
    November 16, 2017 at 6:30 am

    So I was going thru some of the older turtle boy posts and came across this one and I believe 2 others after this. The “Dominatrix” is a friend/family member of a friend of mine. So I asked her about it on FBI, and she is claiming it’s all real. She seemed pissed when I said I thought since they are all over dramatized that Jerry would be even more so. She actually seemed pissed that I said that.

  • Pops Zadinia
    June 30, 2017 at 9:12 am

    Was it me, or a few seconds after the slap heard round the dungeon, did someone in the crown yell, “THAT WAS A FAKE SLAP”?

  • Maura Healey
    June 29, 2017 at 8:39 pm

    Jason L Brown

    23 Scenic Drive, Worcester

  • True Reality Speaks
    True Reality Speaks
    June 29, 2017 at 8:36 pm

    Jeffrey Neal?

    • Charles Napier
      June 30, 2017 at 7:51 am

      THAT FAT ASS DOMINATRIX IS CYNTHIA SINCITY COLLETTE FIND HER ON FB SHES A “RAP SUPERSTSR GLOBAL EMPRESS”

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