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Colrain Got Turtleboy Sports Facebook Page Suspended 3 Days – This Means All Out War

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BREAKING NEWS: Turtleboy Sports Facebook page has been shut down for three days as a result of a conspiracy between Mark Zuckerberg and Colrain. I shit you not, Colrain got us shut down for three days. Here’s why:

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So here’s what happened. This buttnut Zachary Goodell is from Colrain. He said something dumb and ended up on our blog about the Top 15 comments from Turtleboy’s war with the town of Colrain.

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So he messaged us on Facebook, telling us we didn’t have his permission to use his “intellectual property” in a blog, and insinuated that there would be legal steps taken if the posts weren’t taken down. Whenever this happens we usually point and laugh at the nudnik in question for saying such dumb things. In this case we did so by screenshotting our conversation and posting it to Facebook. As you can see we never swore or said anything remotely offensive. All we did was comment and say, “Come on down, you’re the next plaintiff on Turtleboy Internet Court!!”

Obviously there is nothing offensive about this, but here’s why it happened. Facebook is a multi billion dollar company with over 1 billion users. Guess how many people they employ? 7,000. This means there is one employee for every 150,000 users.

So, if you’ve ever hit the “report” button on someone else’s post before, you usually get back a response from Facebook in 24 hours. Ninety-nine times out of 100 it will come back saying that Facebook reviewed it and it doesn’t violate their standards. But that’s because no one actually reviewed it, because no one really works at Facebook. It’s 100% random as to who they take actions against.

You can tell this because clearly there are billions of Facebook posts that are more offensive than the post we put up. We just happened to get unlucky because the computer generator that Facebook uses chose to make an example of us. Obviously a human being would not look at our post and deem it offensive.

Check out what this lady went through:

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Exactly. Because Mark Zuckerberg is a piece of shit asshole who knows you have no recourse. Facebook has a monopoly on social media. Twitter and Instagram suck aren’t even close to being the same thing. Facebook needs competitors.

This is the second time this has happened. The first time was in August when we shamed Nate Pickens for something really racist that he wrote on our Facebook page. We reported his comment and the automated message came back saying that it did not violate Facebook’s standards. Yet when we shared a screenshot of that EXACT SAME COMMENT, Facebook decided that it did violate the standards. Because as you know by now, no one really works at Facebook.

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Turtleboy is pissed. This makes me wanna vote for Bernie Sanders. These billion dollar corporations like Facebook employ NOBODY!! They make all this money and they create ZERO jobs. There’s no customer service phone number, no recourse, nothing. Just sheer laziness in order to maximize their profit margins.

So anyway, we can obviously keep blogging while this happens and will continue to. The problem is that we get tons of traffic via the Facebook page because Turtleboy has over 22,000 followers on there. Plus, that’s where all the good commentary goes down. Until Saturday night, that will be on hold. The blogs will continue, but we just won’t be able to share them on the Facebook page, so we encourage you to share them as much as possible on your Facebook pages.

Luckily Turtleboy always has a backup plan. First of all, if you haven’t followed us on Twitter yet, you should do so by clicking here. We always share our blogs on there too. Secondly we have a backup Facebook page for situations just like this. There’s a chance that somewhere down the line the Turtleboy Sports Facebook page will be shut down for good. That’s why it is critical that you like the Free Turtleboy Facebook pageWe only use this page when our main page is serving a suspension, because the hot takes must continue.

Mark Zuckerberg and Colrain can try to silence us all they want. But we will not allow it to happen.

P.S. There’s high demand for Colrain t-shirts right now. We’re thinking about doing one of these. Obviously these wouldn’t be the final designs and we are all for taking recommendations. Which one do you prefer?

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Double P.S. Fight dirty against these assholes. If you see one of them posting dumb shit on our Facebook page then report the shit out of them. It’s all random but maybe we’ll take down a few of them now that they’ve taken shots at General Turtleboy.

 

 

We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.

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Want to have your business advert seen by over 1.2 million people per month? Email us at [email protected] for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook

Click on the image to get your Turtleboy Sports Revolution hoodie or browse other merchandise from the Turtleboy store.

Click on the image to get your Turtleboy Sports Revolution hoodie or browse other merchandise from the Turtleboy store.

 

 

 

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26 Comment(s)
  • A Guy
    January 9, 2016 at 11:51 pm

    I feel like it should be spelled “Colrain 4 lyfe”

  • Danny
    January 9, 2016 at 7:52 pm

    U gotta do the COLRAIN4LIFE T-shirts cause of the moosehead that made the comment was hilarious

  • JRush
    January 8, 2016 at 12:54 pm

    How about a Colrain shirt that says, “Straight outta Colrain” on the front, and on the back, “you can bet yer biscuits!”

  • JayC
    January 8, 2016 at 5:53 am

    There was certainly nothing “intellectual” about Zachary Goodell’s supposed intellectual property. You might think a 1st grader wrote it.

  • george
    January 7, 2016 at 5:31 pm

    Colrain has the internet?

    • colrain
      January 7, 2016 at 7:38 pm

      Yes Verizon

    • Your mom
      January 10, 2016 at 5:08 am

      For 4 hours a day

  • Mediocrity
    January 7, 2016 at 3:59 pm

    The hillbillies are celebrating with warm Colt 45 and dueling banjos.

    • wabbitt
      January 7, 2016 at 11:50 pm

      And finger blasting their ugliest sister-wife.

  • Wilderschmoot
    January 7, 2016 at 1:18 pm

    I can almost guarantee that the ending to this will involve pitchforks and torches.

  • Sasha
    January 7, 2016 at 12:48 pm

    I don’t like censorship of any kind. And FB is just ridiculous about this. But I like that this happened only because I see a lot of hate coming from your page and the world doesn’t need it.

  • Steven Stover
    January 7, 2016 at 11:51 am

    I can’t think of any reason I would live in Coldrain. Rather dreary joint huh.

  • BobnMic
    January 7, 2016 at 11:47 am

    TB – I think someone is messing with your blog too. This is the second time I had to get here from your Twitter page. When I click on TB in my favorites menu, it freezes on stories up to Dec 23rd. Refresh does not make it work. I even replaced the site in my favorites with a current one after getting here through Twitter yesterday.

    The problem could be from my end but it started right after the Colrain piece. Is anyone else having this problem?

    • Ninja Turtle
      January 7, 2016 at 1:22 pm

      Yes, I’ve been having the same problem. The only blogs I see are from Dec 23rd and older going to the actual website.

    • JR
      January 7, 2016 at 1:44 pm

      Have been having similar issue since the hacker kid a week or so ago. I have to get in to current posts from the “about” or “cart” page and go down to archives then click on Jan.

    • Devils Mouthpiece
      January 7, 2016 at 3:08 pm

      Working fine from Chrome and Firefox and Android flavors of the same.

      • Devils Mouthpiece
        January 7, 2016 at 3:13 pm

        Forgot to mention, try clearing your browser cache. If you know how, great, if not google ‘clear chrome cache’ for instructions. Or replace chrome with your favorite browser name.

  • Angela
    January 7, 2016 at 11:25 am

    Webster, MA supports you!!

  • Clive Turtleboy
    January 7, 2016 at 11:08 am

    Gents, spread the word… If we’re going to war and going after the Colrain nudnicks, reporting their crap as graphic violence seems to work…

  • Young Conservative
    January 7, 2016 at 12:03 am

    Whoah! Let’s not get carried away here. These are the hillbillies that will be voting for Bernie Sanders in the PRIMARY. Don’t stoop to these hillbillies’ level Turtleboy! #StraightOuttaColrain #NoRagrets

  • bird
    January 6, 2016 at 11:24 pm

    Facebook sucks and it is for losers that don’t have a life.

    • tim
      January 7, 2016 at 1:11 pm

      And facebook owns instagram. so no competition there

  • Dobs
    January 6, 2016 at 10:27 pm

    I don’t particularly care but whenever I see a TB post RE: Colrain my brain either replaces Colrain with Colon Rain, or Sheriff Rosco P Coltrane.

    They dun cuffed ya an’ stuffed ya this time TB.

  • Clive Turtleboy
    January 6, 2016 at 10:07 pm

    Understood General. Returning fire!

  • Joetime
    January 6, 2016 at 9:59 pm

    Looks like the crappy little nobody town of Colrain got Turtleboy all butthurt himself..

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