All-Star Criminals

Aspiring Criminal Justice Major Calls 911 While On The Run During High Speed Chase With Police

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This week, the town of Middleboro has achieved significant attention from the news media for a triumvirate of repugnant occurences. First, an alleged drug-dealer was arrested for stabbing the family dog

Then a Middleboro man was arrested for prostituting his girlfriend out of their own apartment.

However, this story right here may just win the triple crown for Middleboro:

A Middleboro man called 911 to say that he was being chased by “fake cops” as he was speeding down Harrison Boulevard in Avon Monday night, police said.

The state police dispatcher he spoke to assured him he was being chased by real police officers and should pull over.

Instead, Kory McSweeney, 22, of 101 Oak St., Apt. C, in Middleboro, barreled on and struck an unmarked Brockton police cruiser that was blocking him from entering the on-ramp of Route 24, Brockton Police Lt. Kenneth LeGrice said.

McSweeney nearly struck a Brockton Police detective, drove onto a sidewalk, drove over a median and struck two cruisers in an attempt to escape Monday night, police said.

He was charged with two counts of assault with a dangerous weapon, reckless operation of a motor vehicle, failure to stop for police and failure to signal. He pleaded not guilty and was ordered held on $25,000 bail at his arraignment.

Screen Shot 2015-05-27 at 9.30.32 PM

Oh Kory, this won’t win you over any friends at the police Academy, but let’s look on the bright side at some of the things you can now put on your resume. You’ve established that you have experience in a dangerous police situation, you have a fearless attitude, and just like we are told when we are in kindergarten, always call 911 when you are in trouble! On second thought, let’s get this kid a badge and gun!

He went on to reveal that the reason that he didn’t pull over, was that he thought the cops were “fake”. This kid is crazy like a fox! I might have to use that excuse the next time I’m in a pinch. “She was married?!? Whoops, I thought her husband was fake.” “Oh I’m sorry that I didn’t pay that fine your honor, I thought the whole thing was a joke.”

After this banner week, I’m excited to see what the cesspool otherwise known as Middleboro has in store, now that summer is finally upon us. Stay tuned!

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3 Comment(s)
  • Drunkandsometimesstupid
    May 27, 2015 at 10:10 pm

    ok ok ok ok ok. It was friggin’ me agrain hiccup AGAIN. I thought heeeeeey, this is my first ever ever ever high speedo pursuit. So I thuncked okay. I am in realistic training for copness and I am a pissa badass. Hiccup. I did knot mean to call 911. I really really really meant to call 411 so I could crap I meant could grab a pizza from friggin’ a pissa place I mean pizza place. Then I goat premeditated hiccup I mean arrested yet again for crayon out load. Next time I’ll be more cheerful hiccup I mean careful. 🙁

  • RSoxGuy
    May 27, 2015 at 9:07 pm

    Looks like he got a little boo boo. My Grandfather used to say, “You might out drive the cruiser but you cant out drive the police radio.”

    • BobnMic
      May 27, 2015 at 9:53 pm

      Motorola wins all of the time.

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