All-Star Criminals

Man Gets Arrested For Masturbating To Woman Walking Into Brockton Police Station

This summer has officially seen every bizarre crime imaginable in the City of Champions.  Multiple daily shootings, three separate robberies of Dunkin’ Donuts, drug overdoses at a Taco Bell Drive-Thru, rampant EBT fraud, convenience store clerks selling drugs, retail heroin “shops” inside people’s own homes, and now the icing on the cake – some dude diddling himself to women as they walk into the police station.

 

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Anthony Scott, 52, of 91 Ames Way, Apt. C343, Dorchester was arrested and charged with open and gross lewdness. The victim, a 46-year-old woman, was delivering food to the Brockton Police station, at 7 Commercial St., about 7 p.m. when she noticed Scott on the nearby MBTA Commuter Rail platform.

 

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Oh Anthony, there has to be something better out there for you to jerk-off to! Ever hear of pornhub?! Even the Foxy Lady is right down the street! And if you’re gonna diddle yourself to women walking by, you might wanna stay clear of the police station?!?! Hello! On second thought, if a fully-clothed woman delivering food to a police station is all it takes to get you off, then all the power to you. You probably couldn’t handle the Foxy anyway.

Scott was sitting on a bench facing the entrance to the police department with his hand inside his unzipped shorts committing a lewd act, Brockton Police Lt. Kenneth LeGrice said.

 

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The woman notified the officer in the lobby and the Scott was placed under arrest.

9 Comment(s)
  • TurtleBoySpurts
    August 19, 2015 at 2:06 pm

    I gotta say, I didn’t realize that ol’ COB was black, or from Dorchester.

  • A Guy
    August 17, 2015 at 10:16 pm

    Love the It’s Always Sunny “The streets are flooded with the ejaculate of the homeless” reference.

  • Devils Mouthpiece
    August 17, 2015 at 12:36 pm

    Bet there’s some poetry in that story for RBG to use in Oakland.

  • RJ
    August 17, 2015 at 11:59 am

    Let he who has never masturbated outside a police station cast the first stone.

  • juror seven
    August 17, 2015 at 11:51 am

    Looks a little like Obama’s uncle.

  • Nanny
    August 17, 2015 at 11:41 am

    I can safely say that I’ve never snapped the carrot in public.

    • helterskelter
      August 17, 2015 at 1:12 pm

      you boring mf

  • mack4966
    August 17, 2015 at 11:27 am

    If he is an illegal alien, please don’t deport him. In time he’ll turn his life around.

  • Kevins 9 Iron
    Frank Lee
    August 17, 2015 at 11:07 am

    “with his hand inside his unzipped shorts committing a lewd act”

    Are they sure? He might have just had bat wings he was fixing. Men get them in this heat.

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