Sports

Miss America Took A Steamy Dump On Tom Brady, Later Admits She Just Made It All Up

The Miss America contestant from Georgia was asked whether or not she believed Tom Brady was a cheater, and the butthurt oozed out of her mouth. 

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Last night on Miss America, Miss Georgia was asked, “legalities aside, is Tom Brady a cheater?”

Now the correct answer to this is actually really simple – “By saying “legalities aside” you’re asking me if you think Tom Brady should be assumed to be guilty on a whim. I am competing for Miss America, not Miss North Korea. Therefore I refuse to humor any stupid questions that begin with “legalities aside.”” Unfortunately she’s got two things going against her – 1) she’s in a beauty pageant, and 2) she’s from Georgia – a place where learning goes to die. That’s what led her to say this:

   

Make it stop.

Newsflash – your hometown football team is the Atlanta Falcons. They were just busted in the offseason for illegally pumping in noise during home games because your fans can’t make noise on their own. THAT is something that gives a team an actual advantage in a football game. PSI doesn’t. It wouldn’t matter how many times you “felt” the balls, as you said you would’ve liked to, PSI has never had and never will have any effect on a football game. But no one gave a shit about the Falcons because just like the other 31 teams that don’t play in Foxboro, they are irrelevant.

Later on while being interviewed she admitted that she had absolutely no fucking clue what she was talking about. Naturally this means she was the winner.

Look, the fact that Miss America is still a thing in 2015 is insane. We parade these hot women around in ballroom wear and bathing suits, and then we ask them questions that are specifically designed to show the world how dumb they are. At the end of the day the one who says the dumbest thing gets a crown. Murica.

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18 Comment(s)
  • BobnMic
    September 14, 2015 at 5:38 pm

    She was just jealous of Gisele because Gisele is hotter. Babes this good looking a vicious on other good looking babes. Hense the cat fight. Other then the dumb comment about my quarterback, she is an absolute smoke show!

    • Wabbitt
      wabbitt
      September 15, 2015 at 6:35 pm

      They don’t even have to be good looking to be vicious..

      I used to work with someone who would look at every new female employee and say one of two thing…

      “She’s ugly!” Which meant she thought the woman was cute.

      “She ain’t even cute…” Which meant that she thought the woman was attractive.

      And if she thought the woman was actually ugly, she wouldn’t even comment. It was like clockwork. Never failed.

  • RSoxGuy
    September 14, 2015 at 2:39 pm

    Gisele at 35 is still WAAAAAYYYY Hotter than this chick who nobody will remember next week.

  • Nanny
    September 14, 2015 at 11:41 am

    I’d be happy to console the runners up. Just let me get my ear plugs first.

  • September 14, 2015 at 11:01 am

    Really people?? Anyone living on the southern side of the Mason-Dixon line are dumb as shit… Must be all that humid, hot air they live in day in and day out. Have never heard a person from down South speak at all intelligently…Actually, “morons” does come to mind and this new Miss America is just a perfect example of what is grown down South….

    • Chris From Georgia
      September 14, 2015 at 11:49 am

      Really Pam? Enjoy shoveling all that snow in winter!!! Southern Woman are hot!!!

      • Kevins 9 Iron
        Frank Lee
        September 14, 2015 at 11:56 am

        if you can do more than a night with that talking tree stump then my hat is off to you.

      • September 14, 2015 at 2:26 pm

        Yes, Chris.. I DO love shoveling snow and all the wonderful outdoor activities that winter brings to New England. The fresh, cold air keeps the mind sharp and clear.. As for Southern women being hot and as a woman myself, that is really up to personal opinion. I have seen some beastly, toothless hags down there as I do have relatives who live in the old South..I guess beauty IS in the eye of the beholder. Just saying….

        • Chris From Georgia
          September 14, 2015 at 2:57 pm

          Born and raised in Massachusetts, I’ve spent over 50 years shoveling snow and I’ve never met anyone who ‘loved” it. Moving down south was the best move I ever made. I’m also quite thankful Ive not run into any of your relatives! 🙂

        • RSoxGuy
          September 14, 2015 at 3:06 pm

          Holy shit Pam. I think you were looking in a mirror when you were down south. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder indeed. yet you sit back and bash an entire subsection of the country and base their education level on humidity. Stupidity is every where. You’ve proven that.

    • Finnish Goalie
      September 14, 2015 at 12:11 pm

      Your vast travels, eh?

    • RSoxGuy
      September 14, 2015 at 3:04 pm

      Pam is your typical ignorant, snot nosed uppity schmucks from Massachusetts, who looks down her nose at everyone from her mansion in Tatnuck. For those of you who dont know, Tatnuck is a small part of a shit hole city in Massachusetts that %99 of the country couldn’t point to on a map much less pronounce correctly never mind giving a shit about. Yet here she is, slamming million of people and blaming the people she sees as “morons” as being stupid due to air humidity. Absolutely brilliant.

      Never heard anyone form the south speak intelligently? Julia Roberts (Georgia), Oprah (Mississippi), Chris Rock (South Carolina), MLK (Georgia), Bill Clinton (AR), Jimmy carter (Georgia), Percy Julian (AL), Helen Keller (AL), Mae C Jemison (AL) and John Lewis (AL) would beg to differ.

      In the end, its asshats like “Pam” from UppityTown that give the rest of us a bad name. Pam,I wonder what the people from Sherborn or Cambridge think about the dump you call home in Worcester with all its poor stupid people bumming for $ on the highway off ramps.

      • Wabbitt
        wabbitt
        September 15, 2015 at 6:30 pm

        Chris Rock is from Brooklyn. He may have been born in South Carolina, but his family left right after he was born.

        That’s like Massachusetts trying to claim Bush I because he was born here. Dude’s a Texan.

  • Chris From Georgia
    September 14, 2015 at 10:32 am

    She’s an embarrassment to the State of Georgia for that comment. She went to Mercer which is not exactly like a University of Georgia or Georgia Tech. You have to admit though that these Southern girls are hot!

  • Jbd22
    September 14, 2015 at 9:56 am

    Huge mouth, Wayyyy too much eye make up and dumb as a stump. Seems perfect for Miss America 2015. Sad thing is She is exactly who the majority of people in this country have become.

    • Penny
      September 14, 2015 at 12:48 pm

      Agree! Intellectually, this is what we’ve been come. Physically? Not so much. Obesity is an epidemic and the society is aging.

      As for me, I’ll take smarts over superficial, made up beauty–which is going to fade anyway.

  • Kevins 9 Iron
    Frank Lee
    September 14, 2015 at 9:26 am

    Wow suddenly my balls deflated so it can happen.

  • BlackandWhite
    September 14, 2015 at 9:05 am

    First of all, WhyTF is that question relevant??
    Second – Who gives a rip what a ditzy model has to say about football??

    Finally — TOM BRADY was NOT the only person who play football that day.
    JEEBUS People. GET. A. FRICKIN. LIFE!

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