All-Star Criminals

One Guy At Auburn Gangbang Almost Got Away, But He Was Betrayed By His Own Ass Cheeks

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Yesterday we told you about the Hubbardston Madame who organized the now infamous Auburn Holiday Inn Express gangbang. Courtney Nicholopoulos and her boyfriend Jon Lowell apparently organize these orgies, collect money from the dudes, and then never pay the unsuspecting aspiring porn stars.

But the jig was up this week, and we got a hold of the police report, and it’s actually a lot more hilarious than we first realized. First of all, this was the 7th gang bang that Courtney Nicholopoulos and Jon Lowell had organized in that suite since December. They had it down to a science. The dudes ranged from the ages of 20 to 65, and they were told to come in the back door of the hotel and to stay out of the lobby.

We don’t know how it officially commenced though. So like, did the first two people there get down to business, or did they have to wait for at least 10 people to show up? Because by the time the the undercover cop walked into the room, all 27 people were buck naked. The gangbang had already commenced. Ya got that? The undercover cop was walking into that room, apparently under the assumption that she was gonna tag one of the other girls out so they could take a break.

Do you realize how small these rooms are? This isn’t Caesar’s Palace. It’s a dumpy joint on Route 12 next to Bunk Beds and Beyond. Can you imagine what that scene must’ve looked like? Imagine 27 of the nastiest people, including one guy who probably went to school with Old Balls, doing unspeakable things to each other in this room:

Screen Shot 2015-07-18 at 11.21.34 PM

Here’s my question  – who had dibs on the bed? How can you even fit 27 people in there, breathing heavily, at the same time? Must’ve been a sauna. Don’t get me wrong, it sounds like a great time, but there’s just too much of a possibility of making inadvertent skin to skin contact with someone you didn’t pay to have contact with.

Anyway, according to our source the women were told that they would be paid $5,000 for sex with a condom, and $12,000 for real sex. One woman was there because she thought she was starring in a porn movie. Ya got that? Someone actually believed that the porn industry is now centered in Auburn, Massachusetts. Apparently she started to get down to the “acting” with a couple of the “actors” but she didn’t question the fact that there were no cameras in the room, and there wasn’t some shady looking guy yelling directions at her.

Screen Shot 2015-07-18 at 11.42.16 PM

The best part is the end. After the cops raided the room and took names down the gangbang was officially ended and everyone went home. Except for one guy, who somehow wasn’t found because he was hiding behind the curtains. Apparently the police were set to leave after taking down 26 names, when they got a phone call from the front desk. Some busy body outside had looked up to where the room was and noticed something that didn’t look right – a hairy pair of flabby ass cheeks pressed against the window.

Make that 27.

Talk about a shitty night huh? These poor dudes were having the time of their lives living out every fantasy they’ve ever had. Then this smokeshow sixth woman shows up and they’re thinking, “sweet” more “actresses.” Next thing you know the SWAT team comes in and you’re standing there bare ass, blue-balled, and thinking about how you’re gonna explain this to your boss/wife. Just a typical Thursday in Auburn!!

And it’s all Courtney Nicholopoulos‘ fault, because she didn’t wanna pay the talent. The way that Courtney Nicholopoulos recruits these people is she tells the dudes that for $100 they can pretty much treat the Holiday Inn Express like it’s Whalom Park. Go on all the rides and have a whale of a time.

k9dx5

And she probably could’ve kept getting away with it if she wasn’t such a sneakthief. Because it’s safe to say that the vast majority of people have no problem with a consensual gangbang in a Holiday Inn Express. But the women need to get paid. That’s why the cops had a beef. Because there are civilized ways to run a gangbang, and then there’s the Courtney Nicholopoulos way.

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18 Comment(s)
  • Nanny
    July 20, 2015 at 7:44 am

    Thanks for the graphic depiction of flabby ass cheeks. My morning is now complete.

  • Devils Mouthpiece
    July 20, 2015 at 3:28 am

    Before and after pictures of the room would have been interesting. Bet the cops had no problem finding evidence, on everything in sight… The hotel manager probably has to call one of those companies that clean up after a natural disaster or smoke damage from a fire.

  • Wabbitt
    wabbitt
    July 19, 2015 at 11:43 pm

    I don’t want to think about the plume of fuck stink that must have greeted those poor cops.

  • BobnMic
    July 19, 2015 at 11:07 pm

    So how does this work exactly. You show up and whip your Johnson out and say “FREE SAUSAGE” or something to that effect. I mean really? And then you get arrested. Nice.

    My goodness better hobbies are out there. Fucking idiots.

    Try flying a kite.

  • thibby
    July 19, 2015 at 8:49 pm

    turtle boy, you are the fuckin best…. cant stop laughing about your article.

  • Drylaw
    July 19, 2015 at 2:05 pm

    If she is Greek did she have some greasy pizza at least for the women to keep up their strength and also use it as lubricant because methinks she was not supplying any. Byob, byoc and byol…..

  • Jack
    ChuskUSA
    July 19, 2015 at 1:06 pm

    How much did they charge ?

  • Steven Stover
    July 19, 2015 at 11:39 am

    You saw the police report. What’s the names of the infamous 27?

  • RJ
    July 19, 2015 at 9:48 am

    she didn’t question the fact that… there wasn’t some shady looking guy yelling directions at her.
    ———-

    I’m sure there was. Probably a few.

  • Frank
    July 19, 2015 at 9:46 am

    Hey turtleboy why don’t you post blogs about real news! So many other pressing matters in the world.

  • Chris Seith
    woodsman
    July 19, 2015 at 1:25 am

    If you went to south high you must be a st peters wanna be.

  • Chris Seith
    woodsman
    July 19, 2015 at 1:18 am

    The cops in this state are too worried about overtime and talk on the phone detail work to stop real crime. I know some one personally in Worc thats been broken into 2 times recently because he was dumb and called the police when members of a gang thats been shooting at each other are hanging out on his stoop. Dumb dumb

  • woodsman
    July 19, 2015 at 12:59 am

    Almost bettter than detail work, quit loving cops moron.

  • oneopinion
    hanginpossum
    July 19, 2015 at 12:33 am

    Courtney’s last name sounds Greek.

    • Wabbitt
      wabbitt
      July 19, 2015 at 11:42 pm

      Maybe she’s raising money to shore up the collapsing Hellenic economy.

      • oneopinion
        hanginpossum
        July 20, 2015 at 8:00 pm

        Or encouraging the dudes to make the best of the guy to girl ratio

  • Boo Boo Bobby Gibbs
    July 18, 2015 at 11:04 pm

    I wish I got invited to the Gangbang. But I smell like dumpster gravy and for some reason, women don’t like that

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