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You might be from Southbridge if you’ve ever panhandled for breast milk from strangers on the Facebook machine.

Pro tip – if your raw dog trophy isn’t taking a bottle, it’s probably best to consult with your pediatrician, rather than panhandle for gerber server goo from strangers on Facebook. Ya know, because they’re strangers. You don’t know who they are, whether or not they have the “disease,” and in general you should be fully aware of the health risks involved in everything you toss down your child’s gullet. And they have milk banks that vet this stuff for you.

My crotch fruit wouldn’t take a bottle either because he liked the good shit fresh from the tap. But in this case the kid would still be taking a bottle, she just assumes that the reason the baby isn’t drinking it is because she’s a picky little thing that only likes the real shit. I’m not questioning that, because I’m sure it could happen, but a medical professional is usually the person best suited to help you out. Then again, Mom wears scrubs to work, so she’s basically two steps from being a doctor herself.

The most responsible thing she did was post this on a Brimfield yard sale page. She knows the dangers of trying to get Southbridge breast milk. It’s gonna come in syringes and be filled with with angel dust and goya.

I knew something was up when I saw this:

Dog filter. We got a live ratchet folks.

Then it came to my attention from Uncle Turtleboy that this particular hefalump was originally from Spencer, has appeared on Turtleboy in the past, and is one of the original GoFundMe scam ratchets. We first found her begging for money for cash to pay her bills while her child (who clearly and sadly is a VERY unhealthy weight for a kid his age) was in the hospital. And not because she wouldn’t help him get out of the car seat which he was clearly too big for.

She said she lost her job around the holidays because she visited him (sure thing), but then changed the story and said the kid was out of the hospital already.

Then she started going to wealthier towns like Shrewsbury and hitting them up for more donations with a “raffle” she was conducting for shampoo.

And in true ratchet style she posted it everywhere.

Shockingly it was not her first GoFundMe.

Oh, and she obviously has no problem asking strangers from wherever for breast milk, since she also asks them to be her personal Uber driver.

She’s actually a local legend in the scam game.

And an accomplished rapper.

The best part is that a week after her GFM last time she went out and bought a car, even though she said she needed the money for car insurance, and other bills she couldn’t pay because she and the chudstuffer were unemployed.

Keep in mind, three years ago she was so poor that she was reduced to online panhandling, despite her able bodied baby daddy being the very rare sperm donor who actually stuck around in Spencer and Southbridge. And what did the two of them decide to do? Fire out another tax break from the baby cannon. Because obviously they were in a fine position to have another baby.

She was not happy the first time she became Turtleboy famous.

Something tells me she won’t be pleased three years later either. But this was before my time, so it’s new to me!