Get the newest Turtleboy Sports t-shirt (as seen on the Felger and Mazz show) by clicking the picture above.

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.
 

Look at Deputy Diddler in all of his creepy, predator glory:

Red Flag #1: A grown ass man posing with Woody Woodpecker looking like he’s having the best day of his life and can’t wait to go get an ice cream cone with rainbow sprinkles!

I get it. Woodhead.

I’m going to call him Dick Woodhead though because it seems so much more appropriate.

Dick was arrested at his home on 36 Kerry Drive in Attleboro and brought to court in Rhode Island on kiddie porn charges today.

Witnesses saw Homeland Security, R.I. State Police and members from the Rhode Island State Police Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force seizing computers and boxes from his home. It was an attorney that discovered a hidden compartment in his bedroom closet which had child pornography in it. Also found in Dick’s secret cubby O’ fun was a bottle of some sort of acetone solution labeled “Jamba Juice” which prosecutors believe he may have been huffing.

What. A. Fucking. Creep.

It seems as though ol’ Dick has been being investigated since September of 2016 and there are telephone conversations and “documents” to corroborate the allegations against him.

Ya know, in case the secret stash of naked children wasn’t evidence enough.

Dick is 52, married to Deborah Woodhead and has two adult children. He’s been active on the Attleboro police force for 32 years. Maybe that’s what warrants him being on PAID ADMINISTRATIVE LEAVE while they dig up more dirt on him. It’s unbelievable that this suckwad is earning money while sitting in a court room facing felony charges. I think today I’ll knock over a 7-11 and drive drunk over my neighbors lawns with a hooker in my trunk. I’ll get arrested but will still get a paycheck, right? No? I thought that’s how this worked…

So his charges are possession of child pornography, attempting to entice a minor for sex and attempted receipt of child pornography. What a standup member of society. He didn’t enter a plea and is being held until a bail nearing next Wednesday even though his judge tried to get him released with a GPS ankle bracelet. Why not get his a terry-cloth robe and a cucumber face mask while you’re at it?

It seems that everyone who works with Dick had no idea he was a fucking weirdo even though his job title on his Facebook page looks like this:

Yes, he’s a juggler at the circus kids!

I don’t believe that these people are as shocked as they claim to be. Look at this skeeve! He has those empty, beady eyes and probably has sweaty hands and wears crocks with wool socks when he’s off duty. He’s like a bootleg version of Lenny from Of Mice And Men it’s highly likely he may have a cemetery of dead animals buried behind the woodshed in his back yard.

BARFBARFBARFBARFBARF

We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.