WTF

Shark Attack At Surfing Tournament Proves We Were Right About Chatham Shark-gate

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So there was some type of surfing tournament yesterday in South Africa and a surfer named Mick Fanning was attacked by a shark before he kicked the shit out of it.

That might be the scariest shit I’ve ever seen. Only an Australian could survive something like that. “Hey shark, you think you’re a bad ass? How bout I punch in the face?” I feel like this was an episode of Russell Crowe’s “Foightin Round the World”.

Obviously we’re bringing this up because last week people were up our ass because we suggested that throwing a beached shark back into the water in Chatham might not have been the best course of action. But this just proves we were right. Sharks aren’t our friends. They are there to eat whatever is in the ocean, including humans.

Some people were saying that the ocean is their home, not ours. Says who? The ocean belong to whoever takes it. So when a shark washes ashore on a beach because it was dumb enough to get beached, why is it our obligation to make sure it lives? The land is ours. If they come ashore we shouldn’t be showing them mercy. They are the enemy and this proves it. Because as you can see, this is how they treat us in their territory.

P.S. Isn’t it supposed to be winter in South Africa right now? This is what January is like for them? Surfing competitions? This is bullshit.

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7 Comment(s)
  • BobnMic
    July 21, 2015 at 12:18 am

    Man that dude reminds me of my man #87 Rob Gronkowski from the Pats. This is what the Gronk would have done. Turn around and say, “Hey Jaws – take this motherfucker.” Then BAM! Knock him the fuck out. And swim ashore and break out into a party dance. Maybe even drag the shark back to shore by it’s tail and then spike the fucking thing.

    • BobnMic
      July 21, 2015 at 12:27 am

      Do you think I (most likely we) are sick of the Red Sox already? I love summer but bring on the world champs from Foxboro. I miss greatness.

    • Finnish Goalie
      July 21, 2015 at 10:06 am

      I prefer Gronk with his hands attached.

  • oneopinion
    hanginpossum
    July 20, 2015 at 5:59 pm

    How to speak Australian: “guppy.”

    • Finnish Goalie
      July 20, 2015 at 6:45 pm

      Fosters, mate!

  • GoneWest
    July 20, 2015 at 4:27 pm

    Mick Fanning – the guy makes a hell of a flip flop. Shout out to anyone rocking reefs with a bottle opener.

  • Finnish Goalie
    July 20, 2015 at 12:59 pm

    Not our home because the guy needed a piece of fiberglass out there to keep himself from drowning.

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