Mainstream Media Fails

The Turtlegram Pulled Dianne Williamson’s Column Blaming Turtleboy For The Fake Petty And Rivera Facebook Pages Because We Own Their Brain

The Telegram Pulled Dianne Williamson’s Column Blaming Turtleboy For The Fake Petty And Rivera Facebook Pages Because We Own Their Brain

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The other day in our blog we explained how Turtleboy has created a virtual monopoly on news in Worcester. The Telegram, Masslive, and Worcester Magazine are always coming to us for quotes while ripping us off and pretending we don’t exist whenever we break a real story. Because at the end of the day they know that writing about Turtleboy is the only thing they can do to get cheap clicks. It is what it is. We also told you that Karen Webber would be publishing a column written by Dianne Williamson that would be insinuating that it was Turtleboy who created these allegedly fake Facebook pages satirizing Joe Petty and Sarai Rivera:

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Are these really them? I dunno. The comments are gone now so we have no way to find out. All we know is we found about them because people sent us screen shots of them. They were gone by the time we went to look for them so we have no way of verifying. Either way, our Facebook page is filled with friend and foe alike using fake names just to upset people. Off the top of my head I can think of Thomas Brennan, Brett Nichols, Brittany Kingsley, Joe Kher, Michael Hawk, Richard Hurtz, and a plethora of other names who purport to be someone they are not.

That’s why it would’ve been so humiliating for the Telegram to publish a column like this. Because it’s small time, stupid, and they’d be admitting that they’re using Turtleboy for page views.

And wouldn’t you know it? After reading our blog, Karen Webber elected to pull Dianne Williamson’s column. Again. Because she obviously reads Turtleboy on a daily basis and realized that we were right. If Turtleboy is as insignificant as she wants us to be, then why does her newspaper keep writing about us? She knows we control the media, and she realized she’d be admitting that if she let Dianne Williamson lie like that.

So she pulled the column. Not because she has any issue printing unproven, baseless lies for cheap page views. But because Turtleboy convinced her that it all it would do is increase our legitimacy and readership. Just surrender already Karen. We win, you lose. Don’t worry though, Turtleboy Industries is hiring. Do you know how to shake up an iced coffee and make it taste good? If so, you’re hired!!!

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Tattoos Massachusetts

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4 Comment(s)
  • Mike
    February 27, 2016 at 4:49 pm

    You should offer to publish Dianne’s rejected columns.

  • Wabbitt
    wabbitt
    February 27, 2016 at 2:26 pm

    Turtlegram.

    Best zinger ever.

  • don't be so petty
    February 26, 2016 at 8:07 pm

    I thought Dianne was a turtle rider? What the hell?

  • BlackandWhite
    February 26, 2016 at 6:55 pm

    ROFL on the iced coffee!!
    Probably would definitely charge extra to “shake”, but then double check (after the fact) to see if it’s OK to charge extra to “shake”

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