Hoodrat Heroes

Turns Out The Dartmouth Race-baiting Yogapoon Lives Like A Bootleg Kardashian Because She’s Banging An Elderly Millionaire Who Went To Jail For Tax Evasion And Owns Half The South Shore

Turns Out The Dartmouth Race-baiting Yogapoon Lives Like A Bootleg Kardashian Because She’s Banging An Elderly Millionaire Who Went To Jail For Tax Evasion And Owns Half The South Shore


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Yesterday Western Mass Turtlegirl published this blog about a ratchtacular ghettofabulous yogapoon who opened a fake yoga studio/sweatshop across the street from a real yoga studio, run by real certified instructors in Dartmouth.

Particularly she was teaching “Buti yoga” which they were not certified to do. When they began to get called out for it she announced that they were shutting down the business because….cultural appropriation:

“It is no coincidence that this group of primarily white women have appropriate West African (our heritage) cultural and tribal dances.”

This of course was written by Jennifer Azadnia, whose parents are from Iran. My favorite country in West Africa.

But the best part of the story in my opinion was her Instagram page. The Dartmouth Yogapoon is one of the most magnificent ghettofabulous creatures I’ve ever seen:

The best are the videos:

This is what happens when the Kardashians meet New Bedford.

Well we received an email from an ex-employee who told us what it was like working for the Dartmouth Yogapoon, and it sounds like tons of fun!!

  • She reminded every single one of us to “stop acting like ungrateful bitches.”
  • She had us all do trainings for HOURS, sometimes until midnight and all unpaid. She says she paid up to 5k for her trainings and that we should be grateful that she’s not charging us to be trained. (Still have never seen a documented certification) 
  • She’s suspended instructors for two weeks for taking classes at other studios, she’s suspended instructors for doing something incorrectly in her classes.
  • She’s tried suing many instructors for taking classes because they were breaking her contract.
  • Rather than issuing the issue professionally with her instructors, she would sit them all down and call them out on little things. For example “You fucking didn’t put the volume up high enough. You’re fucking up MY classes. I pay for you body, to teach MY classes. Stop fucking up” or “Get your head out of your ass”.

And she also doesn’t like the legitimate yoga studio across the street. Here’s a video of her barging in there with one of her Cape Verdean instructors to do…….somthing:

Dartmouth Yogapoon: I thought since we teach Buti now…I thought that when we were coming in, that you weren’t going to be nice to us.

Receptionist: No, you can take a free class if you want

Dartmouth Yogapoon: *Slowly walks away, I just have one thing to say to you. Wash your hair bitch.”

Receptionist: “Oh my god, tell me something new. Bye”

I feel like I wanna watch a movie about this chick or something. She’s just so fascinating.

Now, a lot of people were wondering, how does some no talent broad like this get all this money to live this glamorous south coast Gucci lifestyle? Her Daddy must be an Iranian gun runner right?

Nope. She actually comes from a working class family. The real reason she’s able to open all these yoga studios and drink champagne and throw the glass on the floor of the Gucci store is because she’s banging this dude:

His name is Michael Panagakos, and he’s like 70 years old. She appears to be in her 20’s. And he is the richest dude on the South Shore. He owns Panagakos Development, which buys and rents out commercial and residential property all over the south shore, as well as Aruba and Mexico. He literally owns half the south coast:

Included in there is the sweatshop yoga studio where the Dartmouth Yogapoon started doing bootleg yoga and then cried about racism when she got called out on it. It’s pretty easy to own a business when it’s rent free. Well, not free technically. She has to toss this old dude a face frosting once or twice a week.

Her sugar daddy is a huge asshole himself, and a general pain in the ass. On top of suing or threatening to sue almost every town he’s done business with, he’s also done time in jail for a couple offenses. First his bar served alcohol to minors from UMass Dartmouth, one of whom ended up getting struck and killed on the walk home:

And since he’s the biggest asshole ever he then sued the other two kids the deceased student was with. Oh, and he also went to jail for tax evasion:

Who’s gonna notice that $5.4 million in income wasn’t reported? It’s not like this is why the IRS exists or anything like that.

That picture from up above is actually from her sister’s wedding. It was the only image we could find of them together, because Jen goes out of her way not to be seen with him in public. Don’t get it twisted though. She loves driving around in Porsches, going out for yacht rides, and drinking cristal. She’d just rather you not know that she only has these things because she’s basically a prostitute who blows disgusting old rich dudes for financial security. Hope her sugar daddy doesn’t try to sue us and lose like he did 10 years ago with the Cape Cod Times!!!

29 Comment(s)
  • Balls Deep in Poon
    October 27, 2017 at 5:25 am

    It’s a win win, what’s an ugly old rich guy to do? Same as a good looking poor young guy. Get poon and for her it’s a step up from street corner knob-jobs.

    My only criticism is he should be housing several more attractive street sweepers. Telln’ Ya’ it’s a win win for them and society. Not pleasant to imagine but a positive arrangement.

  • dbk
    October 25, 2017 at 6:36 pm

    I was at the Raddison blu by the creek in Dubai, picked up an Iranian girl at the jazz bar. Hands down one of the hottest girls I have ever been with, banging body and super cool attitude. My point is ok I dont really have one, but from personal experience Iranian pussy is pretty good, however I didnt give that ho the keys to my kingdom! But then again I am not a balding 70 yr old manlet.

  • DickMastersSon
    October 25, 2017 at 10:52 am

    What a fucking butterface.

  • Hopeless
    October 25, 2017 at 10:19 am

    SHE WENT INTO RITUAL SWEAT SOCIETY?!?!?! Is she nuts?!? What would’ve came from that. They could’ve been mean to her and she would’ve caused a big stink? Sad day for because all of the ritual employees are beyond sweet and happen to be true yogis who care about human beings. & to top it off once they were nice and offered a free class she told the girl to wash her hair? Jen, mind your business and go do more cocaine at Gucci events please. (See instagram post on October 13 2016 with Rhue using hashtag #cocainecampaign) ps: you’re pushing 40. Might be time to lay off the white shit

  • Tony
    October 25, 2017 at 9:53 am

    Donna Wood’s ex boyfriend.

  • geez....
    October 25, 2017 at 6:42 am

    “appears to be in her 20s”. Do some fucking research. A simple google search shows she’s 36 without having to click on a link. Sorry, this TB needs to go. You can’t put down other media sites when you have shoddy work like this. Nice proof reading, too.

  • Ratchetlife
    October 24, 2017 at 9:08 pm

    This chick missed her calling a flaming gay guy.

  • gfldgadfly
    October 24, 2017 at 8:03 pm

    Ooooh, she’s gonna get passed on like a hot potato for embarrassing Gramps (more than he embarrasses himself, anyway).
    Is it possible to sue for Lost Potential Earnings when you’re in the world’s oldest profession? Asking for a friend.
    Richard Vulva, Esq. told her you can.
    I smell an Internet lawsuit! Making popcorn now.
    My favorite hookers are the ones who think they’re high-class, and the ones who don’t think they’re hookers. Not necessarily in that order.

  • Yogi girl
    October 24, 2017 at 7:41 pm

    Iran.. my favorite country in West Africa. This woman is a disgrace to Cape Verdean culture

  • We're off to the witch
    October 24, 2017 at 7:41 pm

    She’s married to Ronnie James Dio?! I thought he was dead!

  • Southcoast Yogi
    October 24, 2017 at 7:28 pm

    The “Cape Verdean instructor” does all of her publicity shots. Talented photographer in her own right that is sucked into Jen’s nonsense. It’s unfortunate. “Rhue” (Rylee) only started teaching when the Buti studio open, because that’s what besties do, like, everything together, because that’s totally Gucci.

    • Southcoast Yogi
      October 24, 2017 at 9:21 pm

      Oh and Rylee is 14 years younger than Jen. Besties for life, though.

  • Lou P
    October 24, 2017 at 6:43 pm

    Persians are the worst.

  • October 24, 2017 at 6:11 pm

    The bitch is 36. Thirty. Six. Hence the constant face-obscuring and those ugly fucking sunglasses.

    • Finn
      October 24, 2017 at 9:19 pm

      [nods sagely]

  • Southcoastwiththemost
    October 24, 2017 at 5:36 pm

    Who cares who she’s banging? At least you, I, we don’t have to touch him. (Or her) Let’s be real, people sleeping with each other to perpetuate success (wealth, fame, a better life) isn’t news – it happens a lot) And I’m not condoning how she runs her business, because I have no idea – but anyone with any sense could have figured out that many of the “kids” who teach her classes weren’t certified. That’s probably why classes are “free” or $5, you get what you pay for. I think you’ve done a sizeable job of laying it all out and trying to expose her business – now it’s up to the consumer to decide whether they still want to partake of the service her business offers. Right? Now I’m going to get 8,000 people telling me they don’t agree with me – that’s democracy!

    • jamesso33
      October 24, 2017 at 5:55 pm

      Girl power. You sound like such a strong independent prostitute… sorry woman.

      • Southcoastwiththemost
        October 24, 2017 at 6:59 pm

        And you sound like someone who just likes to insult people, sorry man. I didn’t say I sleep with people for money, did I? I said “it’s happened before and it’s not news”. But I guess if you had to get completely the wrong idea from what I wrote, you accomplished that!

        • gfldgadfly
          October 24, 2017 at 8:18 pm

          Actually that was an intelligent response and the prostitute comment was unwarranted.
          I think that the levels of perceived success of a mate are a full spectrum. I guess most average folks just ask themselves, “can this person contribute equally to a relationship and its normale finances, support themselves, and at least remember to take out the trash if I sprain my ankle?”
          The indignant way us normal folks look at her is because she’s literally funding a lifestyle beyond her means by chasing the Grey Skwirl. Not the cute guy her age who owns a lawn care company down the street. She doesn’t want to go snowmobiling in Maine this winter. She wants to go to Rome. Enough to pull taffy for it.

    • Finn
      October 24, 2017 at 9:17 pm

      “Now I’m going to get 8,000 people telling me they don’t agree with me – that’s democracy!”.

      Yes, actually that *is* democracy. Just because the majority of people may or may not agree with you doesn’t mean it’s not a democracy.

      “Let’s be real, people sleeping with each other to perpetuate success (wealth, fame, a better life) isn’t news – it happens a lot) ”

      Soooooo… that’s ok? [shakes head]. Look, I don’t give a fuck if she has her sugar-daddy financing her endeavors. Good for her. However, her “champagne and Gucci” persona is boring and gross. She’s a racist asshole who has to S a D to get her business started.

      “That’s probably why classes are “free” or $5, you get what you pay for.”

      True dat.

  • Zen Aniston
    October 24, 2017 at 5:15 pm

    How can anyone feel good supporting a people like this?

  • Mom's Basement
    October 24, 2017 at 4:50 pm

    That dude’s money could go a lot further if he bought a Hooters franchise, made himself the manager, and then befriended someone running a designer drug ring facing jail time.

    • Nunya
      October 24, 2017 at 7:44 pm

      Hahaha amen

    • He needs hotter ass
      October 24, 2017 at 10:29 pm

      I was just going to say doesn’t he know with that kind of money he can get ass much hotter than her? Look at that fat slob Joe using his friends drug money, the amount he has is pocket change to this dude and look at the tail(s) that dude has. This guy is 70 he shouldn’t be wasting the last bit of his life on some narcissistic cunt with cellulite and thunder thighs. He should definitely hit up joe and get some lessons from him.

  • Stunt Penis
    October 24, 2017 at 4:44 pm

    He’ll never sue TBS… not when he hears you have Attorney Richard N. Vulva, Esquire, on retainer!

  • South Shore Proud
    October 24, 2017 at 4:36 pm

    Please, for the love of Turtleboy Jr….stop calling the South Coast the South Shore. Although both have lots of fabulous rachets, they are two different areas of the state. Us normal South Shore natives do NOT like to be associated with the ghetto trash of the South Coast.

    As for this Kartrashian wannabe….she is a disgusting hosebag wannabe.

    • South Shore 4Eva
      October 24, 2017 at 9:34 pm

      Reiterating that the South Coast and the South Shore are not the same parts of the state and the terms are not interchangeable.

      I know we’re all supposed to be grossed out that she’s spreading them up for a Senior citizen, but I feel a bit for him too. How much viagra must it take to get a solid boner when the broad you’re trying to stick it to is wearing two different shoes and Elton John’s sunglasses?

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