Hoodrat Heroes

Turtle Springer Breaks Out On TB Facebook Page Between Deadbeat Dad, New Boo, And Baby Momma With New Dad Who Appeared On Turtleboy Yesterday For Breaking Into Cars

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The Turtleboy Sports Facebook page is currently shadow banned, so it’s completely hidden from your timelines. But if you want to come to the page it’s still wide open and anyone can comment. And that’s exactly what happened yesterday as our ghost town page turned into a wild west ratchet rowdy down after we published this blog about some Webster, Southbridge, and Worcester trashbags breaking into cars in Northbridge.

Just brace yourself and get your popcorn ready turtle riders, because what you are about to read is one of the most ghettofabulous soap operas you will ever see……

First, let’s get accustomed with the names. This is Gavin Barszcz:


He’s the primary catalyst for everything you are about to read.

It all began when Shawn Bleau made this announcement:

Oh snap!!! Gavin is NOT the father, which directly contradicts what his down ass ho Kanani Punani seems to be implying:

Shawn Bleau is a really responsible adult now and he wants his kid from Kanani Punani. He even has his own apartment AND a job. Like a big boy!!

So Shawn and Kanani Punani have made a child together. This is no longer disputed. With that established, the new pole smoker in his life decided to chime in and share her thoughts about Kanani Punani…..

Shots fired!! Former BFF sweeps in, steals her sloppy seconds, and calls out parenting tactics on Turtleboy Facebook page!! Obviously HUGE upgrade:


Kanani Punani made a brief appearance to defend her honor:

Oh good, they’re “trying to heal from this very hard time our lives.” Because when you get arrested for breaking into cars you are a sympathetic victim. And Gavin is now her “family” because he’s been stuffing the taco for a few months now.

Seems like a great guy to bring around child.

Things were looking good at this point for Shawn and Shayna. However, that all changed when the wild card Kammie Cross showed up and the FACKS started coming out….

Ohhhhhhh shit!!! Turns out Shawn hasn’t been spending time with his baby girl because he’s been in and out of the can, likely due to his vast array of Google trophies:

Kammie Cross the NEW bestie of Kanani Punani…..

And according to her, Shawn hasn’t been paying any child support. What do you say to that Shawn?

Yea, get your FAX straight!! It wasn’t a felony he went to jail for. It was a probation violation for all the OTHER crimes he committed and got second chances from. That’s way better.

And he refuses to give her child support because he doesn’t want Mom to have any of the money. Because that’s how child support works. You make a check out to the kid and they put it in their piggy bank. Definitely.

But wait, there’s more……

Plot twist!! Not only is DCF keeping him from the child who he has not seen in five months, he also has two other kids!!! But it’s cool because he’s got a job, an apartment, and a new girlfriend now. He’s a grown up this week!

Although Shawn is demanding custody of the child, he readily admits that he is in fact a deadbeat Dad. But it’s cool because he’s “working on fixing that.”

And if you think you have a bad breakup story, wait till you hear about how the love affair of Shawn and Kanani Punani ended, and why DCF seems to be involved…….

Well, that escalated quickly!!

Dude comes home from a hard day of shooting up under the Green Street overpass and finds Kanani Punani being defouled by some chudstuffer a la mode!!! Then of course the chudstuffer pulls a knife on him (possibly while still naked) and Shawn John still grabs him and threw him out the club!!

Kammie banani wasn’t gonna let him play the “I’m a good dad now” card….

Boom. Roasted.

Shawn had to clarify – he was not the one bashing on his baby momma, Turtleboy was….

Oh yea, you weren’t shitting on your baby momma, who raised your seed while you were feeding your “disease” and beating up family members. You just said the kid should be taken away from her because of your new found adulthood:

Shawn John’s new boo wasn’t gonna let her mans get disrespected like that on the Facebook machine…

Yea, Shawn wants a woman!! Preferably one who the old guys at the VFW use for a post when they’re playing horseshoes.

I love my job!!!

The bottom line is that none of these people should probably be around children. Anyone who sees this thing as a potential mate:

And brings him around their child, is a ratchet. No normal woman would ever consider granting entry to his cervix scraper. Dude breaks into cars in his free time and wears flat brimmed Chicago Bulls hats.

Nuff said.

Any Mom who still poses for pictures like this:

Is not ready for grown up world either.

Then again when the alternative is this:

The poor kid can’t win either way.

The bottom line is that no child should have to be the center of a heated, white trash discussion on Turtleboy Sports’ Facebook page.

I'm a turtle that squirts. I'm purple. I like popcorn and Facebook drama.
15 Comment(s)
  • Finn
    May 11, 2018 at 9:38 am

    What is the fascination with taking selfies with your dick washer hanging out? All I see when girls (and guys) post pics of their sticking out the tongues is a lack of oral hygiene. You’re supposed to brush your teeth AND tongue. So fucking gross.

    Finally, the girl in the first picture (gray halter top with rose) looks uncannily like Steve Buscemi with a wig on.

    • Dave
      May 17, 2018 at 10:53 am

      >dick washer

      Im flat

  • Turtle Rider 3
    May 11, 2018 at 9:04 am

    Turtle Boy has anyone mentioned that Shawn Bleau’s brother (Matthew Borglund) passed away and he did a go fund me page for “funeral expenses” and wait for it….he stole all the money. Shocking I know!! SCUM BAG!!!

  • English Teacher
    May 10, 2018 at 3:16 pm

    I don’t know why I bother anymore.

  • Old deplorable
    May 10, 2018 at 1:19 pm

    As I stated yesterday, these children are fucked. Regardless of the shitstain they end up stuck with, they are fucked. Very sad. These chicks need their veejayjays’s sewn shut. Prevent more poor innocent children from being fired out of their skanky baby cannons. The best thing that could ever happen for these children is if the human shit who created them DIE of overdoses. Let DCF place them into loving homes. Here’s hoping for it.

    • z
      May 10, 2018 at 3:07 pm

      These tools were once the children. Their children will become clones of their parents. Wash, rinse, repeat. If there had been limits on the “Great” Society we may not be in the mess we are in.

      We stare at the box of a computer screen or smart phone. That ends up becoming the reality to the exclusion of everything outside the borders. It makes us more callous. If it happens outside those borders it isn’t as “Real” as the screen. But we also can say, “Well, I’m only passively watching the screen” when convenient. How many “Likes” did I get today? If I dress like that I can be as popular as the ones I see on the net. Everyone on the internet wears Bulls hats, I need to wear a Bulls hat.

      Technology is killing us. I’ve been involved with Technology my whole working life.

  • Kermiticus 3:21
    May 10, 2018 at 1:13 pm

    Shawn Bleau commented, ” I love the comments myself. I figured i would make it entertaining for the fellow turtleriders.” So he is a fellow Turtle? Addiction wit the special 60 day sobriety, kid neglect, childish bantering with hoodsie chicks who can’t keep their clam locked for one high tide cycle, but he is one of us?
    Being a Turtle is real time baby, but one of the main conditions is you need a proven track record you have taken care of your babies. He admits right in his own posts, he is witholding support, over that old BS excuse, she will spend it on somehting else. Get your head in the game dickhead, it doesn’t matter, once you give the money, it is on her that the kid get the proper needs.
    Me thinks someone has not read the Kermiticus 3:21 of the TBS Bible, “thou shalt not be currently involved in any form of ratchedness, to be a full fledged, validly accepted Turtle.”

  • The Vorlon
    May 10, 2018 at 11:22 am

    Remember, as Bob Barker said, “Spay and Neuter your ratchets”.

  • The Punisher
    May 10, 2018 at 10:56 am

    For the sake of our future, rachets must be destroyed.

  • Bret
    May 10, 2018 at 10:55 am

    Every one of those children needs to have their cunts burned shut…fucks sake

  • MrSmiley
    May 10, 2018 at 10:51 am

    Where’s the Kevin Blackmer mirror selfie? Match them up!

    This is why dcf stays in business.
    There’s no shortage of losers willing to put themselves ahead of their kids no matter the cost.

  • Troubled Nostrils
    May 10, 2018 at 10:44 am

    That one girl has a broad, flat, soft tongue, which would be ideal for sucking cock. The other girl has a strong, pointy tongue, which would be best-suited for rim jobs.

    • Bitchyness
      May 12, 2018 at 5:20 pm

      Once a dead beat always a dead beat has 3 kids gave up the first on like nothing, second one never has involved then he figured third time’s a charm and tried again to pull the same bullshit. At least the first two kids lucked out without having to deal with his dead beat ass. I feel sorry for this third child. As well as others but the fact that the mom isn’t working.e. Enough to grow up it’s sad. This kid has been the same for 12 years now. Never changed a bit. He doesnt pay for not one of his kids never mind trying to get cash for this one. Lmfao. Pathetic waste of space and life. His poor children are the ones suffering and this dumbass girlfriend will be knocked up in know time .. mofo should cut his balls Bec he hasn’t tried in 3 kids to be a dad he won’t try with a 4th. Dead beat isn’t even enough to discribe him. N these pathetic women stick around him like nothing..

  • Rick Shaw
    May 10, 2018 at 10:20 am

    These trashbag whores go down like free beers. Unfortunately sucking the pole isn’t good enough. They need their shredded roast beef between their legs penetrated so they end up with fuck trophies, which in turn provides them with additional taxpayer dollars to fund their tattoos, Newport’s, Heroin, iphones, and used Kia Optimas with big exhaust pipes. This is a vicious cycle because the odds of these fuck trophy kids being productive members of society are less than the odds of Hitler rising from the ashes to dedicate his new found immortality to the plight of the Jews. When I hear about fiery car crashes on 93, I pray that the victims are Turtleboy ratchets.

    • z
      May 10, 2018 at 1:15 pm

      Listen to the “Drive-By-Truckers” sometime.

      “Aftermath USA”

      When I crawled out of bed this morning
      I could tell something wasn’t right
      There were cigarettes in the ashtrays
      They weren’t your menthol lights
      There were beer bottles in the kitchen
      And broken glass on the floor
      Someone must have slipped me something
      Passed out a couple days before

      The car was in the carport sideways
      Big dent running down the side
      Never seen anything as frightening
      As when I took a look inside
      Smell of musk and deception
      Heel marks on the roof-line
      Bad music on the stereo
      All the seats in recline

      The aftermath staring me right in the face
      I’ll get around to breaking even one of these days

      My credit cards have all been maxed out
      The meat in my freezer all thawed
      The IRS laid the facts out
      It’s all worse than I thought
      The welfare lady said enough is enough
      The kids ain’t been to school in weeks

      Crystal-meth in the bathtub
      Blood splattered in my sink
      Laying around in the aftermath
      It’s all worse than you think

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