Hoodrat Heroes

Vaping Vagrant Turns On Formerly Turtleboy Famous Skelewhore Ratchet Girlfriend With Mind-Boggling Story, Accuses Lynnfield Police Of Coverup

A while back, we published this blog about a former vape shop owner who was accused of never paying his employees, operating an illegal pot delivery service out of said failed shop, and blowing all of the proceeds on his then-girlfriend, this lovely young tall glass of class and poise.

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All that Gucci, and not one sandwich for the poor girl. Shame.

Immediately upon the release of this blog, Christina began messaging our page, insisting that she was with us 100% regarding our portrayal of Josh, and insisting she had nothing to do with any of his shenanigans, despite posts like this:

 

In fact, she claimed that Josh was abusive to her,

And offered up extremely compelling evidence, like a couple of suspicious-looking selfies,

 

And a typed letter, purportedly from Josh, although – who knows?

 

Seems legit. She then had me call her, but insisted that I first speak to some guy named Erik from San Diego, who was apparently her new boyfriend.

Erik is Erik Hutchinson, this guy:

 

A 42 year-old self proclaimed “Proud Father, Communitiy Activist, Small Business Advocate & Entrepreneur.” Spoiler alert – he’s actually none of those things. But we’ll get to that later.

Erik spoke to me and insisted that Christina was entirely an innocent victim of Josh’s, who was battered, abused, controlled and intimidated into buying stuff for herself with her parent’s money and then publicly thanking Josh for it. The entire story made little sense, and I decided to promptly hang up, file the whole thing under “crazy shit junkies say”, and move on with my life. Well, yesterday Erik popped back up – singing a slightly different tune.

He sent this video, which appears to be a heated argument between members of the Tsatsis family while Erik cowers in the bathroom like a bitch, then comes out and gets pushed around by a Walking Dead extra.

 

 

Well, then. Okie dokie. He then continues on to accuse the Lynnfield police of covering up the theft of $10,000 of his video equipment, which apparently consists of this:

And then sent another odd video of himself cowering like a scared stepchild while the adults loudly bickered.

 

I quickly recognized him from our conversation back in November, when he proclaimed her innocence and insisted she was a victim.

 

And insisting the Lynnfield police were involved in a nefarious coverup to deprive him of his belongings, because Christina’s parents own a pizza shop. Of course.

Nothing says “Power and influence” quite like a large pepperoni pie and some Baklava, pickup or delivery.  That has to be the reason the police allegedly threatened to arrest him, and nothing to do with him calling them over, and over, and over with a shady story before ultimately threatening to go to the newspapers with this totally plausible tale that clearly doesn’t have more to the story than what he’s willing to tell, like a totally sane person would.

 

 

He then directed me to a live feed on his Facebook page he had been forced to post in an attempt to solicit “favors” from his following,

 

But, by all appearances, what he actually meant by “favors”, was pity cash.

 

It was a little confusing for me, considering this guy spent a good deal of time sending me screenshots of his self-reported massive online following, touting his “big name in the vape industry”, and talking about the three Vape Manufacturing companies he claimed to own.

 

Not only does that have no bearing whatsoever on the story he was trying to tell, it’s not entirely true…not at all. And with an audience that he claims to be 10 times what ours is, what does he need us for, exactly? Well, in his words, apparently our audience is more inclined to help people like him, in situations such as this.

 

Sorry, Erik, but you’re incorrect. Generally speaking, our audience is not particularly inclined to donate money to suspicious-looking junkboxes going through the motions of a volatile and presumably drug-fueled breakup with the mascot for Methadone Mile. I don’t know where you got that from. You might be asking yourself “Why the harsh judgment on Erik, Bristol? He’s obviously a legitimate business owner who just happens to somehow inexplicably be unable to get himself out of Massachusetts and back to California, and is worried about ending up in a homeless shelter.” Well, here’s exhibit A:

 

Just look at him. And, about those businesses he claimed to own? His “big name” in the vape industry? Turns out Erik may have fudged a detail or two there.

 

Whoops, turns out all those screenshots he sent me of his social media following are actually for companies he no longer is associated with. And his answer to what happened to them? Patently untrue. Let’s start with AmeraVape, a company started by Erik and Kyle Kruger, which was closed down around 2014-2015. Erik forgot to mention the part where they were sued into oblivion by a company called AmeriVape for copyright infringement, after it was discovered they essentially pirated AmeriVape’s good name and reputation in a shady attempt to peddle their own shitty products, as reflected in this 2015 court filing.

Amerivape_Inc_v_Kruger_et_al__nysdce-15-01874__0044.0

Hutchinson and Kruger were found liable for a $400,000 judgement and court ordered as “permanently enjoined using the terms “Ameravape,” “Amerivape” or any confusingly similar variation of such term in connection with a business, corporation, trade name or domain name, and from engaging in future violations of 15 U.S.C. § 1125(d), 15 U.S.C. § 1114, 15 U.S.C. § 1125 (a), New York General Business Law §§ 133, 360-K, and 360-L, and Misappropriation under New York Common Law Unfair Competition.”

 

He then rebranded to Avid Lyfe, which apparently also didn’t go well for Erik, as he was essentially too unstable both publicly and privately to continue with the brand. You can hear his batshit, paranoid version here:

 

Or his sister and former business partner, Lindsey Hunziker’s, slightly more level-headed and document-backed version here:

 

Both videos are pretty long, but the TL:DR is that Erik claims his sister is a backstabbing, devious bitch in a rambling and expletive-laced rant, makes some wild accusations that include her conspiring with not one, but two of his exes/baby mamas to strip him of his parental rights (both women have taken restraining orders out on Hutchinson and allege his drug problem resulted in his loss of custody), that Lindsay’s products are made in China, not the USA as she claims, and that she at one point conspired with his ex-business partner from the ill-fated AmeraVape to take a hit out on him, because, reasons. Lindsay obviously disputes this in her retort.

As for his latest company, I’m sure it will do great, judging from Erik’s illustrious track record and his current situation, living in a fleabag motel in Danvers, just a few more bad decisions away from a homeless shelter, begging for cash from gullible strangers. Just look at his totally well-balanced, not drug-induced-at-all posts from the past 24 hours.

 

 

Even his own buddies seem to be connecting the dots here, despite his protests.

 

 

Jack/Gus knows the deal. Sorry, Erik, but I chose to decline writing the story you wanted me to write, because it’s insane. But trust and believe, if I come across anything else about your vagrant, deceptive, grimy ass, I’ll be writing that up, too. People should know what they’re dealing with while you try to dupe them with cries of police negligence under the guise of being a legitimate businessman. You’re not. Go the fuck back to California already.

 

 

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44 Comment(s)
  • Ann Coulter
    December 15, 2019 at 5:53 pm

    And people say I look too SCARILY SKINNY.

    • GangBanger
      January 1, 2020 at 2:10 pm

      Right? You would think strung out sista would gain a few pounds sucking the crisco crevice’s ding ding- the guy probably ejaculates pure McDonald’s special sauce and fry grease. Bag of bones must have loved being with Erik though, at least he is fit enough to achieve vaginal penetration.

      • Buried secrets
        January 1, 2020 at 2:25 pm

        Doesn’t look like vaginal penetration is possible, because it looks like Erik has him in his phone as “Christian” The plot thickens!! Transsexual is right! Holy hell! Even Bruce Jenner looked better during transition.

        • AmeraDildos
          January 5, 2020 at 10:58 am

          Hutchinson failed at making mods, but maybe he can make some customized strap ons for Christina so she can achieve vaginal penetration with crisco crevice. Or would it be anal penetration?? The plot certainly thickens.

      • Mike Jones
        January 6, 2020 at 7:07 pm

        No way that’s a female. I wouldn’t fuck that with someone else’s dick. Gross that tranny and porky pig deserve each other. Let’s hope these two never reproduce even though I’m sure fat boy can’t even find his dick with both hands sitting down. Skelawhore should probably get that hepatitis checked out.

  • Ham Neely
    December 15, 2019 at 12:14 am

    I caught this guy pumping bull cum into his face at Richardsons Dairy in Middleton Massachusetts. I didnt call the local police….well…. because the bulls looked pleased. He just sat there with bull cum dripping down his face. Bull cum!

    • Tate Donovan
      December 15, 2019 at 11:35 am

      I wasn’t gonna bring this up but I might as well now
      I love Richardson’s and everything but one time I got all wigged out. I was hitting balls in the cages and saw Chuck Todd totally naked with his whole arm up a cow’s asshole. Imagine?! And it looked like Fortin was there chastising him. Now I’m not saying it was Fortin but I AM saying if Halloween 2 isn’t in your all time top 5 you’re probably spending time with Josh B on kneeland street

  • Chef Di
    December 14, 2019 at 8:41 pm

    For the record, I grew up down the street from her and she is not as you are portraying her. She is kind and gentle and soooooo humble despite the fact that all the guys(girls to) want to date her. She is smart and popular and I think she was prom queen twice!!!!

    I get why you bash her bad boyfriend choices, I think they probably hypnotized her or kidnapped her with guns and knives. She used to always date the best looking, smartest guys because she is smart and good looking. I think she got full scholarships to BC and Uconn. She also now owns several business. I bet you all to stop commenting if you don’t know her like I do. You LOSERS need to stop body shaming her, she is a 10/10. You probably all think Hillary and Chelsea are hot when they not. Maybe take a break from your jobs at macdonalds and get a education!
    Just becaus she is out of you’re leeg doesn’t mean you should HATE A SMART, SUCCESFUL, BEAUTIFUL, INDEPENDANT WOMAN!!! People always compare her to Helan of Troy because she is Greek and beautiful.

    • Purpleheart1
      December 14, 2019 at 9:03 pm

      Yes, she’s so independent and bright! That’s why she lives at home with daddy, and has the same reading and spelling capacity as a retarded gerbil.

    • Big black
      December 14, 2019 at 9:08 pm

      Chef Di. Is that for Diane? Are you a girl? I’ll put your mouth on layaway for when you suck my dick. You live down the street in lynnfield ? Must be a rich little cunt. I used to go to lynnfield fuck your bitches back about 15 years ago. One girl I fucked had her boyfriend next to me jerking himself off with his legs up in the air smelling his own asshole.
      So yeah, I fucked him too.
      And he wasn’t tight.

  • Who Flung Cum
    December 14, 2019 at 8:12 pm

    Skelatwhore

  • Josh B
    December 14, 2019 at 7:30 pm

    Quit with the jealousy here. All hot chicks are a bit crazy, don’t hate cause she wouldn’t bother talking to you at the club—given all of her nice expensive clothes she probably doesn’t go to the same clubs as you losers. And probably only does VIP bottle service. She steal, yeah right, she obviously has her own money. Probably from modeling. Have you seen her shoes?

    So stop with he hate or Santa won’t bring you gift— losers can get gifts if there nice.

    Also that video looks obviously edited. Did we even see the people yelling? Seems like this guy is a drug addict trying abuse a pretty girl.

    • Purpleheart1
      December 14, 2019 at 9:11 pm

      I wasn’t aware the methadone clinic had VIP seating!

    • Ding ding
      December 31, 2019 at 8:12 pm

      Aren’t you the crisco crevice? She claimed beat her up?

      • UhOh
        January 1, 2020 at 1:00 pm

        She DID claim he beat her up, but I bet the real story is that this disgusted, AIDS infested transexual probably ass raped the crisco crevice. Grease him up in pig grease, and her Greek sausage probably slips right in. Buyer beware- evverryyonneeee up this way knows this tranny chick’s STD record. I hope anyone who’s even touched her has got that Magic Johnson cure. I feel bad for all of the men she deceived by spreading the virus.

  • The rocker
    December 14, 2019 at 2:27 pm

    I heard she’s snorting lines of Parmesan off junkies dicks. She’s riding reverse cowboy on two mozzarella sticks dead in her asshole!

    Jam a stale French bread in your assholr kid and call it a day

  • AJ Alphonse
    December 14, 2019 at 2:13 pm

    Is she supposed to be some sort of prize? I’d sooner jerk off to a #2 pencil.

  • That 'Would' guy
    December 14, 2019 at 1:25 pm

    Would

  • The Polar Express is what I call my asshole around the Holidays
    December 14, 2019 at 11:47 am

    As a local Lynn/ Lynnfield line faggot; a few times I’ve sucked off the delivery drivers at lynnfield house. One of them has a huge cock but, there’s always a but, it has a tinge or Ceaser salad smell. Which leaves you wanting a quick snack. So I don’t know if it’s some type of clever marketing scheme or what but I’m up to 4-5 chicken ceasers a week.

    • Shut up
      December 14, 2019 at 12:55 pm

      Go back to Lynn with the scumbags you piece of shit

  • Dick Suckah
    December 14, 2019 at 8:46 am

    if you eat at Lynnfield House Of Pizza you’ll get explosive diarrhea. splattttt

  • Silencio Dogood
    December 14, 2019 at 2:03 am

    He should take his thumb out of his ass and hitchhike home, like a man. Buy some bread and a jar of peanut butter and hit the road. Those skeletal remains won’t be able to follow him and he’ll see this great country from his passenger seat jonesing.

  • Erik Cant Find His Way Back To San Diego
    December 13, 2019 at 10:39 pm

    Perhsps I can take over bitch tits auditing company while he is in jail. Is HTTG mentally sane. I could hook up with her and get donations from the auditers while bitch tits is in jail.

  • liz
    December 13, 2019 at 8:19 pm

    Miss auschwitz 2019

  • Seamus Flanman
    December 13, 2019 at 8:10 pm

    She looks like the after picture cops post of meth addicts
    Jesus what a hideous cunt
    Balling her would be beastiality

  • Greek Freak
    December 13, 2019 at 7:34 pm

    I drank a bottle of crown royal and shes still ugly as a mother fucker. I’ll keep drinking and let you know when she’s beautiful

  • cumquat
    December 13, 2019 at 6:15 pm

    I would love to lick her feet. mmmmmm

  • Pro Rape
    December 13, 2019 at 6:07 pm

    Would. Repeatedly. My keyboard is currently covered in cum and I’m drenched in cum. Would!

  • Methadone mile meets Mister Steele
    December 13, 2019 at 3:57 pm

    Landon Steele and this 80lb crackhead creature should hook up. Both are skeletors and love drama. Imagine the size of the kids they would make? They would come out clicking like Eithiopians in a bad article in National Geographic. Oh the drugs they could both do and end up killing each other.

  • Say what now?
    December 13, 2019 at 3:21 pm

    TL;DR

  • Mike Hunt
    December 13, 2019 at 2:36 pm

    ‘Skelewhore’ is an all-timer!

  • Poster Child
    December 13, 2019 at 2:02 pm

    “mascot for Methadone Mile.” This one made me laugh out loud!!!

  • I'm Outta Here
    December 13, 2019 at 1:10 pm

    I briefly dated a chick in the 80’s. Went to visit her family and they were all arguing and people were throwing shit. Craziness. I quickly left and broke up with her on the phone. Don’t need that shit in your life. Fuck that.

    • Corinth Arkadin
      December 13, 2019 at 5:32 pm

      Can you look her up on facebook? I’d like to see her today.

  • John Blutarsky
    December 13, 2019 at 12:49 pm

    Gotdamn! I can’t stand fat chicks, but this is way too extreme!!! Christ, she looks like a holocaust survivor. Eat a fucking burger, crackhead!

  • Vigil Ante
    December 13, 2019 at 12:44 pm

    Anyone else get hard looking at her veiny stick figure arms and complete lack of any ass what so ever. You can pump so much drugs into those sexy arms. Hopefully she does the world a favor and pumps too much in one day soon.

  • Vigil Ante
    December 13, 2019 at 12:39 pm

    Also, nice green hair you fucking loser.

  • Vigil Ante
    December 13, 2019 at 12:37 pm

    Dudes named Erik with the K are all weird fucking cunts.

    • Corinth Arkadin
      December 14, 2019 at 9:36 pm

      Either that, or they’re Vikings.

      I guess there could be some overlap, Venn diagram style.

  • Norris
    December 13, 2019 at 12:34 pm

    Oh yeah, her. One of the ugliest fucking mistresses ever. You’d think if fatty mcgee were such a baller he’d be able to underwrite a WAY hotter side piece than this scarecrow. He might be a giant piece of shit, but she should have to pay him back for all the cheddar he wasted on her.

  • Garcia Vega
    December 13, 2019 at 12:30 pm

    The entire group need to be rounded up and squashed like the cockroaches they are, note: if it takes you more than 5 sentences to explain your predicament, your lying…

  • Manheim
    December 13, 2019 at 12:25 pm

    Vaping=losers. I’m going to start a new trend: hitting yourself between the eyes with a claw hammer. The buzz is rad and get better with more hits to the head. Better still is having a friend bash your head in. You get to see God. They get a free ride, 2 hots and a cot and all the butt sex they can take. Win-Win.

  • Zappa
    December 13, 2019 at 12:24 pm

    Lynnfield House Of Pizza is awesome and the people there are great They make a killer ham cheese and turkey lettuce tomatoes mayo toasted it’s awesome good people there I don’t really know them I’m not affiliated with them but if I’m close to there I go buy those sandwiches and they have calzones that are actually stuffed pretty good ! and then yeah fuck this guy fuck that girl fuck all of them
    Could they be related to some bad eggs in the family ? sure that happens ? But I feel compelled is a long time turtle rider to mention the people at house of pizza are good people

    • Nick Hearse
      December 15, 2019 at 9:41 pm

      I ate that and got the Hershey squirts

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