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Earlier this week a bunch of people tagged Turtleboy on this Berlin Police Department Facebook post.
Wow, that takes guts right there. Big guts. Unfortunately the crime happened two months ago, so if the criminals were on foot they’re at least a mile and a half away by now. Although odds are at least one of them has died from a heart attack, so their status is up in the air. According to the cops they stashed $1,200 worth of stuff in their purses, but that doesn’t include the fupa factor.
You could hide an antire Thai youth soccer team deep within her caverns, which is why she always bares the midriff on robbery days.
These tittooed tamale sisters have to be the most identifiable criminals ever. Although based on their appearance I think it’s safe to say that looking in Clinton would be a good start.
It’s safe to say that this is by far the biggest post in BPD history. And as you can imagine, the comments section was rather colorful.
Fair game right? After all, they’re criminals. It’s OK to make fun of criminals.
But of course the fun patrol had to virtue signal about the feelings of these ratchet raviolis.
Oh no, muh feelz!! You can’t say mean things about the physical appearance of criminals! I’m sure they just have low metabolism rates.
There was a lot of this too.
It’s pretty simple – don’t rob stores and you don’t run the risk of being body shamed. And if you are a plus sized pinata, and you insist on committing crimes, then maybe don’t wear the clothes that used to fit before you discovered blue cheese. It will make it harder to “body shame.”
And yes, if a male lardo walked into a store with his rolls showing on camera, and was shamed by the local police department, I’m willing to bet people would make fun of that too.
But what it if it was your sister?
Odds are if my sister was a ratchet, then I too would be a ratchet. In which case I’d likely be in the comments section insisting that they dindu nuffin, while shouting free muh boi at the top of my lungs.
If they were drop dead gorgeous they wouldn’t need to rob stores like this because they could just find some idiot to buy it for them.
Actually, we are going to do this, because that’s how freedom works. There is also plenty of reason to body shame, because their actions are shameful, as are their bodies. I don’t dislike them because they’re fat; I dislike them because they’re criminals. And when you cross that line you are no longer deserving of civility in the comments.
Then we had this clam.
Yea, all you mean single guys are obviously just jealous. This could be your life if you were just nicer:
This one had my dying. Not so much because of her comment, but because of the first one after it.
Savage. How appropriate for a post about the Nacho Clan.
Is it bad that I laughed the hardest at this one though?
“Making fun of fat bitches is the best though.”
Some people just cut right to the chase.
Finally the BPD had to step in to restore civility.
Oh come on. “Making remarks about a person’s appearance has nothing to do with identifying them.”
Except it does. It has everything to do with identifying them. Chances are they’re at a Cumby’s somewhere right now buying Newport Lights and scratch tickets with their food stamps. And at the very least we know not to waste our time looking for them at Planet Fitness. We can tell these things specifically because of their physical appearance.
You can’t ask for the public’s help and then whine when people say mean things on your Facebook page. That’s not how the Internet works. You gotta know when you post a picture of two beef blumpkins covered in tittooes that people are going to make comments about that. It’s human nature. It’s also the biggest post they’ve ever made, and the more people interact with it the more likely it is that someone will recognize them. Quite frankly I’m shocked no one has four days later.
Meanwhile, Vivian Avenatti says she’s suing if BPD blocks her.
Anyway, if you know who either of these ripoffpotamuses are feel free to let us know. I find it unfathomable that at least one person can’t identify one of them.