Smiles And Sunshine

We need 3 Contestants To Come On Turtleboy Live For Our First Installment Of Around The Turtle 


Tomorrow on the live show I wanna try something different. Got this idea from backup producer Dave Cullinan. Have you seen Around The Horn on ESPN? I’d like to do tomorrow’s show like that. Watch this if you haven’t.

We could have a show like that, except not terrible because Sarah Spain won’t be on it. I’ll be the host/judge/referee, and I’ll have 4 guests on who share their takes on the blogs we discuss (I’ll give you the topics ahead of time of course). Every time you give a hot take I give you a point. Winner gets…something. Bret is one of the 4, meaning I’d need 1 more guy and 2 more gals. You’d have to use your real first name and Skype into the show. Creating an account is wicked easy. DM Clarence Woods Emerson on Facebook or email and you’re in. 



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22 Comment(s)
  • DudeRanchStripClub
    November 11, 2019 at 9:30 am

    The inner struggle of enjoying this content but having to listen to peg-leg pirate Bret is too close to call at this point.

  • Yawn
    November 10, 2019 at 9:21 pm

    You can’t even support this endeavor or this website without donations. What is the grand prize going to be, your next $5 go fund me donation?

    • Real_Finn
      November 10, 2019 at 11:35 pm

      Yet, here you are.

      This reminds me of an interview where the journalist asked “haters” of Howard Stern and “fans” — “Why do you listen?” .

      Both answered, “To see what he says next.”. I think you do the same.

      I know if hate a blog, I don’t bother with it. I hate Alex Jones, Audit America, etc. They’re annoying AF and don’t make any thought provoking content.

      You’re here because – love him or hate him — you know he’s spot on.

      Get Fucked,

      • Yawn
        November 10, 2019 at 11:41 pm

        Let me know when this site doesn’t need scraps for donations and can give a worthwhile prize to any sucker that plays this game of his.

        • dowen0895
          Dick Scratcher
          November 11, 2019 at 3:38 am

          Tell you what. I’ll let you know when you can fuck right off.

          Spoiler alert: It’s right now.


  • Clean up the Language
    November 9, 2019 at 7:02 pm

    Bret’s response to criticism of his foul language is to write a response full of foul language and name calling. TB, do this show on your own. You talk of wanting to be thought of as credible. With your Saturday night live as it is…could that be why people doubt the credibility? The language makes it almost impossible to listen to at times.

  • Lee Ho
    November 9, 2019 at 3:40 pm

    Since this site is the most prestigious hub of intellectual activity in America, Tonight’s winners should be rewarded the old-fashioned way;


    • murdochpatsymcreynolds
      Ho Li Phuk
      November 9, 2019 at 5:37 pm

      Lee so hawny!… Lee so hawny!

  • Lee Ho
    November 9, 2019 at 2:23 pm

    Please no gay midget porn stars.

    Just hot Asian women on show.

    • murdochpatsymcreynolds
      Ho Li Phuk
      November 9, 2019 at 3:20 pm

      Asian girl love you long time, right Lee?

      • Lee Ho
        November 9, 2019 at 3:27 pm

        Yí gè yú chǔn de nán rén gěi le tā de qī zǐ yí jià sān jiǎo gāng qín zhì zhě gěi qī zǐ yí gè zhèng zhí de qì guān .

        A foolish man gives his wife a grand piano. A wise man gives his wife an upright organ

        • murdochpatsymcreynolds
          Old Tom Morris
          November 9, 2019 at 5:31 pm

          Asian girl like to play skin flute, right Lee?

  • noteatotetote life
    November 9, 2019 at 7:33 am

    The Ghost Cowboy says it. Ye face turns bright red as he walks away. Laughing heartily. The VOICE guy note continues to act as the elephant in the room. Ye eye it. In the distance Ghost Cowboy can be heard whistling. Ye stomach does flip flop exercises.

  • Mat
    November 9, 2019 at 12:20 am

    I’d do it if the prize was a night at the Encore with hot tow truck girl.

  • Bret
    November 8, 2019 at 11:35 pm

    Ya know, you bitchmade little crybaby don’t have to watch, right? You can avoid it entirely!
    But nah, you fake named cowards would rather cry like a bitch that got fingerfucked and dumped…
    See Ya Saturday bitches.

    • Shut up, Brettiny
      November 9, 2019 at 5:52 am

      The best part of you was a crusty stain on some motel sheets, Brettiny.
      Go put your greasy hair up in pigtails and get back to work behind the Taco Bell dumpster, chugging meatsauce for rock.

    • Don’t watch the show, you say?
      November 9, 2019 at 8:13 pm

      Do you really want people to avoid watching the live show? That will not grow the TB audience. How about you just clean up the language? Judging from the up arrows regarding complaints about the foul language….there is not just one person that feels that way. Looks like others are in agreement.

  • Real_Finn
    November 8, 2019 at 11:00 pm

    Sounds fun!

  • Spic Tormentor
    November 8, 2019 at 10:13 pm

    I volunteer as tribute as long is BTC is there so I can pump some child batter into her

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    Old Tom Morris
    November 8, 2019 at 9:34 pm

    Bret and his Obama Phone dropping f bombs every other word is so entertaining and informative. I love it!

    • Jeff J
      November 8, 2019 at 9:51 pm

      Old Tom you hit the nail on the head.

      “Fuckin’ cunt this, shit clit that blah blah blah”. It’s like a high school kid who never grew up and learned how to talk like an adult. It takes a show trying to be somewhat legitimate and COMPLETELY devalues it.

  • Scott
    November 8, 2019 at 9:31 pm

    Im in

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