Nudniks

Weymouth Queefnado Goes Full Hambeast On Community Facebook Page After Neighbors Complain About Her Overgrown Eyesore Of A Lawn

 

Strap yourselves in turtle riders because we’re about to introduce you to a woman who has Turtleboy legend potential.

This is Brenda Bolton, AKA Brenda Be Be, AKA Betsy B.

According to her Facebook page she is the CCO (Chief Creative Officer) of the American Family Happily Institute.

I initially thought this was some sort of joke, but it turns out it’s way too real. They have a Facebook page that seems to be a bootleg Occupy Democrats that posts crazy political rants and claps back at anyone who disagrees.

I’ve looked over her organization (if you can call it that) several times, and I’m really no closer than I was initially to having any idea what they (she) do (does). According to the intro video on the her YouTube channel they will help you “get your happily on through games,” “gamify your life,” and they promise to “level up your happily.”

Like this game called “Cooties.”

OK then…..

She had (and still may have) a street performer’s permit in Cambridge.

Because there’s nothing I want to see more than a grown woman doing weird shit in public when I’m forced to drive through the hellhole known as Cambridge.

She came to our attention today when she posted in a Weymouth Facebook group, complaining about her neighbors who asked her to pick up tree branches in her overgrown, poorly kept yard, allegedly because they are an eyesore.

According to her the neighbors only pick on her because she is a single (shockingly) woman. It has nothing to do with the fact that she readily admits that her lawn looks like there could be three or four Vietcong hiding in it for an ambush.

She’s also not happy (despite being the CCO of an organization that helps you get your happily on) that people allegedly call the cops on her when she has friends over, and despite being white is blaming that on racism.

One guy did attempt to help Wokezilla, but she just accused him of mansplaining.

Another guy offered to swing by, pick up all the crud on her lawn and haul it out of there. Naturally she turned him down because there were “strings attached,” even though there were no strings attached whatsoever.

Perfectly sane.

Another nice person offered to help, but the Weymouth Queefnado turned her down as well because she can’t trust strangers to help her.

She wasn’t looking for help, she was just looking for a place to bitch about how oppressed she is living in a neighborhood where people don’t like lunatics driving down property value.

According to her she can’t clean up her lawn because she’s single and has to work for a living.

Those YouTube videos aren’t going to make themselves.

Other people asked to see her yard, since it’s hard to have an opinion about something if you can’t see it. This of course was an example of someone using “privilege” to attack her.

As amusing as this woman is she’s actually a really terrible human being who thinks she’s better than everyone else in town. She believes that most people in her neighborhood are racist, which she admittedly learned while canvassing for a white woman who pretended to be Native American for personal gain.

From there it just got worse and worse…..

She said she wasn’t going to respond anymore, then proceeded to respond over and over again. After that she went back to her Facebook page and whined about how oppressed she is, and complained that her neighbors are a bunch of stupid, unenlightened racists.

If this lady isn’t “happily” I don’t know who is.

Poor lady. Can someone in Weymouth or Quincy please, please toss her some D? I’ve never seen someone in need of a cervix scraping quite like her before. I think that would really solve a lot of her problems.

Yet despite the fact that she’s clearly a nutjob, she’s still gotten a lot of positive press from media outlets like WBUR, who covered her “sexy fun time” event in Somerville in 2015.

What does that mean exactly? “It’s a giant party. There is dancing, there is a comedy show, and it’s participatory,” Be explains. Also popcorn, candy, a cash bar, and music with “secret themes in it.” Plus “unusual games” including a Hippity Hop relay race, team Twister, and something in which “You talk to each other people and exchange dating stories.” And, of course, the American Family Happily Institute’s Glamorous OmniAmorous Cheerleaders—“it comes from this idea that everyone needs their own cheerleader because life is so difficult”—“will be getting people who don’t know each other to meet each other.” In part, by passing on the “Six Secrets of Happily,” which somehow or other involve science, psychology, exploration, culture, games and sex.

“We’re talking about dating, relationships and sex, but we’re doing it in a PG-13 way,” Be says. “Our aesthetic is very 1950s based. It’s all very modest. … This is about what I call playful intimacy. It’s a different approach to sexuality. It’s designed to help make some people who are more uncomfortable about sex, make them more comfortable about being able to talk about it with their partner. A new way of approaching sexuality that is more integrated into human life and is less siloed into some special thing that’s out there and it’s weird and bad and dangerous.”

I know I want sex advice from a woman who would probably be a lot less miserable if someone would just take one for the team and bat her around with the bologna baton.

If you think Failure Swift is nuts, wait till you go down the Weymouth Queefnado’s rabbitt hole. The writeup on WBUR is amazing people watching.

The American Family Happily Institute’s, um, official history, though is that it “was founded by myself and my five identical sextuplet sisters,” Be explains. “My sisters and I started out by studying unhappily. We studied that for quite a while. We studied that extensively. Then we realized that it wasn’t leading anywhere in terms of bringing more happily. So we ditched that completely. Then we decided to study the ways that happily gets formed and we founded the Institute, AFHI, which has hundreds and hundreds of scientists, psychologists, educators, all coming together to discover and spread the world about how people can increase their happily.”

“Happily at its shortest definition is that it’s inner peace and self-actualization,” Be explains. “So it’s having peace within yourself and being the best person you can be. That’s quite different from happy. It’s a concept that’s more complex than happy. Also, you can’t be happy all the time. You have to have some other emotions that conflict with happy. Sometimes you need to be sad or angry. But you can hold a little happily in your heart no matter what else is going on.”

“We’re just trying to lead people towards an understanding that we’re all in this together,” Be says. “Now obviously, some people already understand that. For those, people we’re just trying to give them a great time.”

Her poor neighbors. Imagine having to live next to this humorless wench and the people she invites over for happily hour?

You can get away with that shit in Somerville or Cambridge, because they embrace weirdness. But if you bring that jive to a place like Weymouth, which is full of hard working, normal people, don’t act surprised when people don’t humor your insanity.

 

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59 Comment(s)
  • Turd Reversalist
    July 19, 2019 at 2:47 am

    I’m butt a couple of towns over from her and available for a cornhole consult.
    As a professional in matters like this, I like to prescribe a healthy dose of bum stuff to realign her chakras, relieve stress and linebore her colon.
    She should wear the cheerleader uniform, really adds some bubbles to the champagne, *wink wink.

  • The Namely Gamely
    July 18, 2019 at 3:16 pm

    Anyone else notice how she looks like she could be AOC’s twin sister? Get her some oversized spec’s and have her show her teeth, she’s almost a doppleganger. (I guess that IS better than being a gangbanger.)

    Man, she DID take the bait in a happily Failure Swiftly way.

  • Jmod
    July 17, 2019 at 9:16 pm

    Anyone else as annoyed as me by her using an adverb as a noun?

  • JoeMomma
    July 17, 2019 at 7:31 pm

    Brenda Bolton, AKA Brenda Be Be, AKA Betsy B.
    I thought Facebook was deleting all profiles posted under fake names….would be a shame if people reported it.

  • Nuck Chorris
    July 17, 2019 at 1:56 pm

    As we say in The South,
    “Bless Her Heart.”

  • z
    July 17, 2019 at 12:09 pm

    Googled her address. Went to street views.
    Small pile of branches in front. Overgrown property. If it’s her garage it looks like it hasn’t been opened in years. Smart (Clown) car parked in front. Some guy unloading a Hybrid Civic.

    The houses around her aren’t all that. But, they look to be well kept for what they are.

    I wonder how that BnB is working out.

  • Kim Wescott
    TheCureForHope
    July 17, 2019 at 11:55 am

    I especially liked her FB relationship status: “In an open relationship with …”

  • hartf811
    F*U
    July 17, 2019 at 10:52 am

    West Memphis High School and dinner and cooties with a black guy. YUP!

  • Turtz McGurtz
    July 17, 2019 at 10:46 am

    Home ownership isn’t for everyone. If you can’t manage to keep your property from looking like a junkyard, then rent and pass the obligation on to you landlord.

  • randiguy2006
    Jesus.
    July 17, 2019 at 10:23 am

    I thought we were in America?

    Ain’t NO ONE telling me how to keep my yard. Fuck off nosy busy bodies.

  • dowen0895
    Dick Scratcher
    July 17, 2019 at 8:39 am

    Is she also personal friends with Ryan Reynolds and Gwen Stefani?

  • Frank
    July 17, 2019 at 8:34 am

    Do you need any explanation as to why Trump is getting re-elected?

  • Majestyk Melons
    July 17, 2019 at 8:32 am

    I’ve got some farm workers that are in dire need of some happily. However, they would prefer skipping the weirdo games and going straight to the “bend you over like a farm animal” act.

  • Burlando Castile
    July 17, 2019 at 6:59 am

    With a face and tooth gap like Ernest Borgnine and the craziness of Failure Swift, I can’t see anyone giving her the Deep Space Nine. She’s got filthy granola written all over her.

    Throw in a cucumber, expect to pull out a pickle.

  • dowen0895
    Dick Scratcher
    July 17, 2019 at 4:32 am

    This is a right kick in the cunt for Failure Swift.

    Because this headbanger is going to be taking away her only source of attention – her Turtleboy fame.

    More mental and narcissistic than Mrs Narcisi? Who knew?

    • Captain Trips
      Captain Trips
      July 17, 2019 at 10:07 am

      Attention Failure Swift: Someone is vying for the title! Better amp up your game!

  • Silencio Dogood
    July 17, 2019 at 3:42 am

    It no happilyhappily at all. It full of hate speaking to kindness, kindness to strangers It no trust. It sees strings tying It’s Fallopian tubes. It no happilyhappily at all…

  • dowen0895
    Peter Falk
    July 17, 2019 at 3:25 am

    I died 8 years ago, but her Air BnB was still nifty. Ya know? For corpses and whatnot.

    Columbo

    • dowen0895
      Peter Falk
      July 17, 2019 at 3:26 am

      Edit – Fuck you, Eddie Coyle for already mentioning that I was dead!

      The Late Peter Falk.

  • A Few Good men
    July 16, 2019 at 11:04 pm

    Well it looks like I’m not the only one in the comments willing to take one for the team. Gotta keep the greater good in mind you know. Well Brenda you have your willing sacrificial lambs.

  • Art R.
    July 16, 2019 at 10:25 pm

    Let me be the first to say… would!!

  • WeRFucked
    July 16, 2019 at 9:27 pm

    I Would.

    I like dark hair/eyes. Crazy is a bonus.

    • Captain Trips
      CDC
      July 17, 2019 at 10:05 am

      Just wear a complete hazmat suit unless you want to forever after smell like cabbage and blue cheese

  • MILFmanJack
    July 16, 2019 at 9:20 pm

    This broad is crazy as FUUUUUCK – but still could see myself being willing to take one for the team here.

  • Chuckles Manson ?
    July 16, 2019 at 9:01 pm

    Hey I did look up this chuckles guy and this is what comes up on Facebook his little poem or story and also is a picture of a bunch of cows in a sexual position like human centipede

    Love Is a Fickle Bitch, by Cow

    Human often ask, “Cow, why love no last?” Yes, Cow can help with understandings. You see, love is imaginary concept of human. When big fat human brain percolate its chemicals, it cause sensations in body. Human give name to these sensation, calling them emotions, such as “joy”, “sadness” or “got a boner on.” But they no leave well enough alone! They decides one emotion going to be special, going to be many splendored thing that conquer all even though blind and usually crazy.

    But truth is, “love” no less capricious than any other emotion. Feeling of joy fade, feeling of sadness fade, feeling of love fade. But human cling to love delusion. They can no accept it as natural shifting of brain’s chemical cocktails. They must bemoan and belabor when happy hour over and love flicker out, they must write insipid poetries, eat many carbohydrate and subject friends to tedious melodramatic theatrics the likes of which not seen since Cats open on Broadway.

    Animal have no such pretense. Maybe we enjoy sniffing you butt one day, but tomorrow we may wish to sniff different butt. There no need for interrogations or autopsies or brooding over broken promises. Listen, nature never intend for male and female to have more than passing DNA swap. Please no bring up swans or couple you heard about who together 90 years. This freak anomaly, such as solar eclipse or decent movie sequel.

  • murdochpatsymcreynolds
    Liawatha
    July 16, 2019 at 8:59 pm

    I find it appalling that poor Brenda, who is a single woman, has to live in that toxic neighborhood with all those misogynists, racists and Republicans. I can’t imagine the horror.

  • Crystal Laviolette
    Face Deformity
    July 16, 2019 at 8:57 pm

    Why is the right side of her face so much bigger than the left? Appoppos….

  • K lopp
    July 16, 2019 at 8:56 pm

    Hey it says she’s in an open relationship with somebody named chuckles bovine or something I looked through some of the comments
    couldn’t look through all of them where is chuckles what’s his deal ?

    • Silencio Dogood
      July 17, 2019 at 3:45 am

      His?

  • Judge dread
    July 16, 2019 at 8:28 pm

    I hope she gets a bad trip.

    That’s all I have to say.

  • metro
    July 16, 2019 at 8:15 pm

    I sometimes wonder what it’s like for the rejects that are even lower that these fupas to read this. Over 25 and don’t have your own place? Enjoy taking mom’s shaft up your behind while you blow your new boyfriend fags.

  • hartf811
    Manheim
    July 16, 2019 at 7:13 pm

    And all it would have taken is some guy to take one for the team and ask her to the prom. Would have sent her on a whole different trajectory. He might have gotten a slobbering knob waxing.

    • Batman
      July 16, 2019 at 9:20 pm

      I don’t know my friend, that’s a risky proposition. Could end up in pieces spread out all over the place too. Personally feel that you never even try to stick your dick in crazy. Batman out

  • hartf811
    Hartford
    July 16, 2019 at 7:08 pm

    Mmmmmooooooooooooonnnnnnbbbbbbbaaaaaaatttttttt!

  • Captain Trips
    Captain Trips
    July 16, 2019 at 6:51 pm

    So much good info I could rip apart here. But the fact of the matter is:

    Liberalism is a mental disorder.

    And you, my dear, are the poster child for that fact.

    Bet she is a hoarder. Imagine the inside of her house.

    She will die like another hoarder did, when the joists on her ranch home actually collapsed under the sheer weight of the crap she had inside her house, crushing and killing her in the process. And no one knew it even happened for weeks. She was a nut, and no one wanted to know her.

    That is your future, sweet thing.

  • Grandpa Jones
    July 16, 2019 at 6:50 pm

    Wowzer, id give this little gap toothed free-spirited filly a toss in the hay, yes sir papi. I’d like to throw her in a 50lb flour sack and separate the wheat from the chaff boy oh boy, whole lot of Moxy this girl has yes sir. Best thing since elastic Depends with Odor Shield I tell ya. Does she get the Sunday Telegram and Gazette, I hope so…nurse…? NURSE!!!!

  • Anakin Skycocker
    July 16, 2019 at 6:49 pm

    Not gonna lie, I thought this was an advertisement for an orgy or a request for hardcore porn stars.

  • Metro West Guy
    M
    July 16, 2019 at 6:04 pm

    Exactly why I steer clear of Liberal jamokes like this one who get offended if a rat farts 40 miles away. Who needs their BS?

  • Jeff J
    Merv the Perv
    July 16, 2019 at 5:29 pm

    That Playtime Cootie video had all the hallmarks of a bad porn flick. Maybe it was just me but I was expecting the clothes to start flying at any moment.

  • Happily Twatface
    July 16, 2019 at 4:54 pm

    I’m sorry, but even in a cheerleader uniform, she does not make me want any sexy fun time!

  • CT fan
    July 16, 2019 at 4:46 pm

    Are we absolutely certain this person is not related to Failure Swift? They both have the same teefers and they’re both batshit crazy. It’s a total crap shoot.

  • Natasha
    July 16, 2019 at 4:21 pm

    What in the world is a “goodgoodme”? Someone explain.

    • Yum yum
      July 16, 2019 at 11:52 pm

      Pretty sure goodgoodme is B 10 on my favorite Chinese place food menu.

  • Crispy C
    CrispyC
    July 16, 2019 at 4:02 pm

    Straight up: mental illness.

    Does she not have someone around to make sure she takes her meds? She needs help. Yikes.

  • That Girl Was Me
    July 16, 2019 at 3:43 pm

    She looks straight out of the odyssey. odds are she worships artemis and has a killer tunic collection. i’m sure she loves watches her partner getting pounded out by an entire roman phalanx.

    also it’s super fucking lame to complain about your neighbors lawn to any officials. the neighbors are more of a disgrace and that antiamerican scum should be deported to rashida tlaibs homeland of detroit.

    MAGA.

    • That Girl Was Me
      July 16, 2019 at 3:54 pm

      I assumed the city received a complaint. error on my part, she’s just an asshole. any neighbors with kids should move out ASA, she looks like a skinner.

      but let’s be honest it’s a boston neighborhood, probably cambridge, so they should all still be deported.

  • Brooke Ashley
    July 16, 2019 at 3:29 pm

    I had the day free to watch this whole shit show unfold… I was trying to tell a friend about it all and I looked crazy just trying to explain it because none of it makes any sense. Glad I have a turtleboy link for follow up so I can be like “see!”

  • Doogan McDuggan
    July 16, 2019 at 3:27 pm

    If i ever see her ‘Happily’ booth in a carnival, gonna take a steaming shit on it

  • EddieCoyle
    July 16, 2019 at 3:18 pm

    Peter Falk, yes that Peter Falk, recently had a nifty AirBnb stay at her house. He probably did prefer it to his more recent digs. Mr.Colombo died in 2011.

  • M.V.
    July 16, 2019 at 3:16 pm

    Oh my God…. the post was an EPIC story of unhinged lunacy! Shame the administrators took it down, it was so ridiculous that it became hilarious!!!

  • Vigil Ante
    Vigil Ante
    July 16, 2019 at 3:09 pm

    Fucking mentally ill weirdos. Just a walking contradiction. Let’s see….

    Lecture neighbors on how they should mind their own business while not minding her own business…check

    Complain about how you have no time for hours on end in Facebook groups instead of taking care of the stuff you don’t have time for….check

    Complain about how you don’t have time to compete tasks then spit in the face of all the people offering to help…check

    Perpetual victim of all interactions and situations….check

    Fuck this cunt

  • Karma Bus
    Ratchetsaurous Rex
    July 16, 2019 at 3:07 pm

    “was founded by myself and my five identical sextuplet sisters,”

    Yet, it’s ONLY HER, by her SELF.

    And this twat. The city, ANY CITY, is not gonna cut down a fucking tree and leave it on your property Her vision for her stupid company, what the fuck is she trying to even say! Have a little happily in your heart? This bitch some happily in her happily area.

    It’s a full fucking moon tonight. It all makes sense now.

  • lisa flood
    July 16, 2019 at 3:06 pm

    she pissed me off at the first paragraph when she wrote outta instead of ought to !! Then my head exploded … CRAZY IS CONTAGIOUS, STAY THE FUCK AWAY

  • Massholio
    July 16, 2019 at 3:04 pm

    She must have been the last white person to leave Memphis. Also all the houses in Memphis probably look like hers.

    • Andrew Zimmern
      July 16, 2019 at 6:23 pm

      West Memphis is actually in Arkansas. It’s a shithole.

  • Peter Niss
    P. Niss
    July 16, 2019 at 2:58 pm

    THIS is a crazy cat lady who has ascended beyond the level of a crazy cat lady; or you could just call this the legendary crazy squirrel lady.

    Brave cervix scraper who bones this basket of madness, brace yourself. You may have dealt with a lot of crazy cat ladies but nothing can prepare you for this level of madness.

    As for you Uncle Turtleboy, what the fuck have you brought upon this cursed land?

  • Klancy
    July 16, 2019 at 2:57 pm

    What’s really sad is if you take a google map walk down her street. (Although it’s not Uber rich) it’s a neatily (see what I did there) little side street. I didn’t see any messes. Unless she just moved there and started one.
    Being from the NDub years ago, I can tell you it started as summer homes to the beach. Neat and quiet. I don’t know what’s got her pussy hat in a knot.

  • GgAllen
    July 16, 2019 at 2:47 pm

    I can smell her vaginal stanch from my home in Natick!!!!!!

    • Back in the day I was really good friends with GG Allin
      July 16, 2019 at 4:38 pm

      She’s trying desperately to be “quirky, free spirited and fun” but she’s really just a lunatic. The Public Radio Types are always so easily fooled and hustled by the insane, the delusional and minorities who they condescendingly believe have some sort of primitive wisdom or mystical insight. Then they get beat up and robbed. Or worse.

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