Bone Ride

Worcester County Towns Plow Job Rankings 1-20, Part 1

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A lot of people have been complaining about the plowing in Worcester. I’m not usually the type to gripe about city services, but this is a special occasion, because the roads in Worcester blow. I have no idea why they are the way they are, but the bottom line is that it snowed like four days ago – the major piles of snow should be cleaned up by now. But they’re not. We wanted to find out if other towns are feeling our pain, so we did a little tour de-Worcester County today. It was mostly southern Worcester County, but we hit up every town that borders Worcester from every direction as well.

We’re gonna rank the following 20 towns from first to worst to determine which towns do the crappiest job of plowing their roads: (in the order we travelled) Auburn, Oxford, Dudley, Charlton, Leicester, Spencer, Paxton, Holden, West Boylston, Boylston, Shrewsbury, Westboro, Upton, Grafton, Northbridge, Uxbridge, Douglas, Webster, Sutton, Millbury.

 

 1. Douglas

The roads in Douglas are so pristine you could eat Sunday dinner off of them. There can’t be more than a couple thousand people who live there, but I think everyone there owns a plow, because they were EVERYWHERE. It’s especially noticeable when you’re entering Douglas from Uxbridge:

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and then the road magically gets completely clear

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2. Auburn

Auburn does an awesome job with their roads. It was snowing when we first started and the plows were already out in full force

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Every road in Auburn is clean. Even the crappy roads that no one uses unless they’re going to the Millbury Mall, like McCracken Road. Here’s what McCracken Rd looks like in Millbury

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and here’s a quarter mile down the road in Auburn

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Uhhhhhh. So hot.

 

3. Westboro

Westboro touches Upton, which was a complete disaster. Here’s what a road half a mile from the Westboro border looks like

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then here’s that same road right after you cross the border into Westboro

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That’s a nice piece of asphalt right there.

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4. Boylston

I don’t think there’s many roads in Boylston, and the only reason you’d ever go there is to get stiff Mai Tais at the Dragon, so naturally the roads were in tip-top condition.

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 5. Shrewsbury

This was the biggest town we went to today, so I was expecting it to be one of the worst. But it’s Shrewsbury – you know they were gonna do it nicely. We tried to stay off the main roads as much as possible, because you know those would be cleared. But even the side roads in Shrewsbury were all pretty solidly maintained.

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6. Holden

I thought Holden would be #1 on this list. I still got it ranked pretty high, but I dunno, I’d like to see some more asphalt.

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7. Northbridge

Once again we tried to avoid the main roads like 122 in Northbridge. So we travelled over Hill and Lindon Streets, which get you where you’re going but certainly aren’t the major roads. There was still some crud on the ground in a lot of places, but the bottom line is you could drive through it no problem.

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8. West Boylston

They’re all right around the same at this point. Good enough to drive on, but not good enough to eat off of. Either way, give me these roads in Worcester any day of the week.

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9. Webster

I have to say, I was pleasantly surprised with Webster. After all, it’s Webster. I had zero expectations going in and was fully expecting them to be last place. The main roads however were pristine, and even small, narrow side roads got the job done.

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10. Oxford

Oxford was an average plow job town, but it looked a lot better because it’s surrounded by crap happy plow job towns. Like when you’re on Route 56 in Oxford it doesn’t look like anything special

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But then immediately when you cross the town line into Leicester it turns into Bosnia

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Same thing when you’re traveling down Dudley-Oxford Rd in Oxford. Doesn’t look like anything special

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until you cross the town line and enter this nightmare

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The Oxford Streets are like the average girl who hangs out with all the fat girls so that guys will think she’s hot. They’re really nothing special, but they’re a lot better than the alternative.

 

11. Paxton

Paxton is kind of in the same boat as Oxford. I expected the roads to be glorious and Douglas-like. And there wasn’t anything wrong with them. Like Route 31 in Paxton wouldn’t win plow job of the year or anything

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until you look at what the road looks like a mile to the south in Spencer

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Good God. I guess Paxton wasn’t that bad after all.

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12. Millbury

This is another town that people talked up like it was gonna be the belle of the ball. It was aight. The more heavily trafficked roads were fine

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but the further away from the center of town you get, the crappier the roads get

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 13. Grafton

This is another town I had lofty expectations for. Grafton seems like a place that’s way too good for me. I expected their roads to be equally as unattainable, but for the most part I was pretty unimpressed.

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14. Charlton

Charlton wasn’t very good. But luckily for them they border Dudley. Here’s Route 31 in Dudley:

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and here it is in Charlton

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Once again, nothing special, but when you’re next to the fat girl your stock automatically improves.

 

15. Uxbridge

Uxbridge borders two towns that are pretty well-plowed – Douglas and Northbridge. So right off the bat it was gonna be tough to compete with them. But even without that stiff competition these roads are pretty crappy.

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16. Sutton

I’m shocked Sutton is this low. Shocked. I assume everyone in Sutton is a rich person who owns a dairy farm. Their roads should be top 3 at worst. The main roads are pretty solid

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But the side roads are suck bag city.

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Be better than that Sutton.

 

17. Spencer

Hey, at least they’re not last!! I hate to keep picking on Spencer, but what can you say about roads like these?

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Well, at least you have the Spencer Fair and the Summer Nationals to look forward to. Oh, and maybe a sale at Whitco.

 

18. Leicester

Apparently in Leicester the policy towards the recent storm was, “fuck it – we’ll get em next time.” Because Leicester looks like what I imagined it would look like after the apocalypse.

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 19. Upton

I thought I was gonna crash too many times to count in Upton. It’s bad enough the roads in that town are all too narrow to begin with, but there were some streets that make the streets of Vernon Hill look like the greatest plow jobs ever.

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20. Dudley

Holy shit. Whatever you do, don’t go to Dudley until the spring because you’ll probably die. I don’t think I saw a nice piece of asphalt in that entire town. On Dudley-Oxford Road some clown coming from the opposite direction nearly hit me after fishtailing all over the road.

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Get your shit together Dudley.

We’re gonna try to do 2o more towns tomorrow. We’ll see how it goes. Let us know if your town is worth visiting or if we gave your town a bad rap on here.

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38 Comment(s)
  • Jon
    February 26, 2015 at 4:51 pm

    I live in Charlton and dive to work through Oxford into sutton on old central turn pike and that road sucks the most

  • February 10, 2015 at 12:31 pm

    I think that Worcester itself must think that “plow” is a four-letter word. I mean, you’ll see different levels of “bad” or “not done at all” plowing within a few hundred meters ON THE SAME BLOCK. And I mean the STREET, not the sidewalks which the different property owners are responsible for.

  • Crabs
    February 9, 2015 at 10:57 am

    The best thing about these articles are all the butthurt comments from the poor saps who live in these shit towns. Keep up the good work Turtleboy!

  • Anonymous
    February 8, 2015 at 6:46 pm

    No accuracy to this article as some roads in pictures as some are also much more traveled than than others. And really, the commentary using comparison with term “fat girl” is just wrong. Sad you couldn’t think of better terminology for a comparison than using an overweight girl.

  • Chels
    February 7, 2015 at 11:58 am

    “You shouldn’t go to Dudley because you’ll probably die” LOL that’s the most ignorant thing I’ve ever read in my life. If you can’t drive in a bit of snow/slush then take your ass down to the RMV and have your license revoked

  • ken
    February 7, 2015 at 8:50 am

    Sutton is definitely the worst! Drive in any direction from Sutton after a storm and you’ll see how bad it is. Millbury, Northbridge, Grafton and Oxford are generally wet while Sutton roads are snow packed…. for days!

  • 56 Commuter
    February 6, 2015 at 7:49 pm

    We are post-snow for several days now. When will you clean up the middle of the street, Leicester?

  • Nick
    February 6, 2015 at 3:17 pm

    Who wants you in any of our towns anyway?

  • OLAF
    February 6, 2015 at 1:41 pm

    I’m setting up a snow removal task force….DUDLEY has the best CLEANED dead end roads anywhere.

  • KBF
    February 6, 2015 at 7:21 am

    Ugh, you didn’t even see the worst of Dudley. Cruise down Healy Rd behind Nichols. Totally given up trying to keep up with the drifts- they’re about 4ft high and there’s only about 2 ft left of the west bound lane.

  • Goldenballs
    February 6, 2015 at 1:20 am

    Facts are facts most plow drivers are real winners they work just as hard as they have to. I get it you have been in your truck drinking coffee for nine hours waiting for the city or town you live in to give you the go ahead but at the end of the day maybe you bring enough drugs with you so when it’s time to work your not withdrawing waiting for your dealer to answer his phone

  • give spencer a break
    February 5, 2015 at 9:36 pm

    It’s worth noting that Spencer had a fresh 6 inches of snow this morning by 7:30 am while areas four miles away only had 2 inches. Spencer generally does an excellent job plowing and by the end of the day the roads were down to pavement.

  • JJ
    February 5, 2015 at 9:27 pm

    You might as well skip to #60 and throw Ashburnham into that slot. We’re barely Worcester County, but we don’t even plow under 6″, they just sand. I’m not sure where the taxes go, we only have about 11 roads.

  • Wizard
    February 5, 2015 at 9:22 pm

    TURTLEBOY, what do you know about plowing and maintaining roads? Did you compare snow removal budgets between these Towns? Did you compare what each Town has for equipment and manpower? Based on your photos they were taken at different periods and some after the storm was over. Some photos you can see the sun is out and others you can still see snow falling. If you want to perform a true analysis, then you need to have everyone on a level playing field (what point of the storm you evaluate) to effectively assess each Towns competence. Your survey seems to dis the people that are are performing these duties and not those that control the budgets.

    • Finnish Goalie
      February 5, 2015 at 10:05 pm

      So….you on a Public Works team or something?

  • shannon
    February 5, 2015 at 8:47 pm

    I live on a side street in Shrewsbury, it took 2 full days and nights before we saw the first plow, during mondays storm. No one could get out of our street. We had to shovel the road.

    • LETCM
      February 6, 2015 at 6:02 am

      It’s satire
      Comedy
      Humor
      Something to make ya chuckle

      Lighten up Francis…

  • anonymous
    February 5, 2015 at 8:04 pm

    hardwick is totally ridiculous.

  • Wabbitt
    wabbitt
    February 5, 2015 at 7:42 pm

    What part of Webster was that? Because if it’s the part east of the lake then it’s no surprise the roads aren’t bad – that’s where all the half-million dollar houses are. When you go to the west side of town where all the pillheads live, you’ll see roads nearly as bad as Leicester.

    • February 5, 2015 at 8:48 pm

      Slater street, Lake street, Park Ave, and some road that takes you from that bridge that goes into Dudley by the boys club all the way to Oxford near exit 3.

      • Shawna
        February 6, 2015 at 10:01 am

        Bigelow Rd

      • Doc
        February 6, 2015 at 8:30 pm

        Did dude take crib notes on street names in all towns along the journey? More familiar with the WorldWideWebster than he lets on, so I figure. ‘Splains all the ball-busting.

      • Wabbitt
        wabbitt
        February 7, 2015 at 11:36 pm

        Come on TB, those may be in pillhead country, but they’re all basically main roads. Trust me, the side streets didn’t have visible pavement until today, and then it snowed again.

  • jenn dean
    February 5, 2015 at 7:20 pm

    Did you go to Millville??

    Small Town …Big results!

    • February 5, 2015 at 8:49 pm

      Came so close to Millville today.

  • 56 Commuter
    February 5, 2015 at 6:59 pm

    Auburn, Shrewsbury, Westboro have more businesses and more tax money to maintain roads. The whole weather forecast business of north and south of the Mass Pike as a snow line is usually pretty accurate. Thus, northern Oxford typically has a lot less snow than northern Leicester. So, the roads appear to be better maintained.

    • February 5, 2015 at 8:50 pm

      We crossed directly from Northern Oxford into Southern Leicester and it was night and day. Your theory doesn’t hold water.

      • 56 Commuter
        February 5, 2015 at 10:32 pm

        This is my daily commute, so I see the differences every single day. Oxford is always warmer and less snowy than Leicester due to the changes in elevation. This commute goes from the Paxton line to Route 12 in Oxford. Hands down Oxford roads are always better maintained, but some of it must be due to the differences in temperature and amount of precipitation. Colleagues who reside on the side streets of Oxford do not share my same enthusiasm for the Oxford DPW.

  • Jeffington
    February 5, 2015 at 6:48 pm

    “Fuck it, we’ll get em next time”.
    That is funny shit if i may say so.

  • John Clark sucks
    February 5, 2015 at 6:25 pm

    Hey you want nice clean roads? Go Pay for it! Dudley property taxes are so cheap

  • Maggie the Cat
    February 5, 2015 at 6:24 pm

    I know tons of people who have to drive into, out of, or through Spencer. To a person, they think Spencer’s roads are the worst ever. So do I.

  • Bill Kessler
    February 5, 2015 at 6:11 pm

    if you traveled only on West Hartford Ave in Uxbridge, that’s not a good evaluation. Your pictures were taken of the highest point on W Hartford where it is known that the wind whips across the farm fields and blows snow across the road. Perhaps trying another road(s) would give a more appropriate evaluation to compare.

    • puffygrace
      February 5, 2015 at 7:00 pm

      Truth! That pic is taken exactly where I expect to find snow drifted across all winter. Unless you are going to plow the fields too, this is inevitable.

  • Jenn
    February 5, 2015 at 6:11 pm

    I live in Dudley, stay away if you can’t handle driving in the snow. We are real New Englanders, snow keeps riff-raff like you away !

    • carlton
      February 5, 2015 at 7:11 pm

      Lol true new englanders what a stupid thing to say “I’m proud my town doesn’t give a shit about me!”. You don’t need anything to keep me away from Dudley, well, other than knowing YOU live there!

  • Finnish Goalie
    February 5, 2015 at 6:04 pm

    That transition between Uxbridge and Douglas reminds more of the South Park episode where they cross the State line from Colorado to Nebraska.

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