Hoodrat Heroes

Worcester Renaissance: Chuck Clitoris And Kung-Shoe Interrupt WCVB News Broadcast On Water Street To Exchange Fisticuffs, Use Tripod As A Weapon

 

There’s been a “renaissance” going on in Worcester for the last couple of years, and we’ve all been told that the Paw Sox moving here is gonna be the crowning jewel in the Woo’s transformation from AIDS infested ratchet receptacle to gentrified hipster capital of New England. Except there’s just one problem – Worcester people still live here. And a WCVB photographer found that out the hard way while attempting to shoot some footage on Water Street today.

“It’s not every day 2 people randomly decide to fight and your tripod is used as a weapon.”

I can see someone hasn’t been to Worcester that often. I assure that any time a tripod has been within arm’s reach of a Worcester derelict, they have used it as a weapon and not thought twice about. That’s just science.

These two gentlemen clearly had a lot of work to do today since they could take the time to bitch slap each other during the middle of the day. Let’s count all the punches they landed:

Total – 0.

Not one connected punch throughout the entire ordeal. Kung-shoe couldn’t even kick him in the face when he was down thanks to that tripod.

My question is, who stole whose crackpipe? I’d love to find out the answer if we could figure out who license plate 377 WL5 is registered to.

 

 

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65 Comment(s)
  • Monkey see......
    February 4, 2020 at 12:03 pm

    I remember when that building they were fighting in front of was Rudy’s surplus.

  • DudeRanchStripClub
    February 3, 2020 at 3:09 am

    So, let’s commit to honesty. When you watch the video and say not one punch was landed there are two avenues: stupid or liar. Now, I enjoy TB but I detest any form of sensationalism and, unfortunately, this article is fucking dumb. Really dumb. Also, what purpose does finding the owner of that lisence plate serve besides finding out they were having lunch at Maddi’s?

  • Worcester Homo Watch
    February 2, 2020 at 8:23 am

    At least there was no public buggery…

  • Carlos
    February 1, 2020 at 10:40 pm

    First they wanted to be called negroes instead of spades
    Then they wanted to be called colored
    Then they wanted to be called black
    Then African American
    Myself I think chimp has a nice ring to it

  • Art Murray
    February 1, 2020 at 6:56 pm

    You always know when a Turtleboy headline starts with “Worcester Renaissance:”, a hilarious story will follow 🙂

  • Tenfro
    February 1, 2020 at 4:50 pm

    Never be afraid to call a spade a spade

  • P Disguisee
    Pistachio Disguisee
    February 1, 2020 at 1:09 pm

    Cmon 100% fake fight…..

  • Red dog
    February 1, 2020 at 12:47 pm

    The two guys with the dirty work boots were probably on their way home after work,and the dude with the clean work boots probably asked them if they could spare anything for a down and out brother. Dirty work boots probably told him to fuck off and clean work boots got pissed.

  • Dr Ed
    February 1, 2020 at 10:32 am

    Just giving everyone an update on my hospital stay
    I have the DT s from withdrawing from the wild turkey and the syphillus treatments are ongoing
    I was also corn holed by a black nurses aid in the Shit house

    Pray for me

    • Corinth Arkadin
      February 1, 2020 at 12:58 pm

      Thanx for sharing.

    • Dr. Ed
      February 2, 2020 at 9:37 pm

      ROTF, L

  • Renfro
    February 1, 2020 at 10:28 am

    Worcester was a good solid city when it was all white

    • Cry The Beloved Country
      February 2, 2020 at 2:41 pm

      Unfortunately thats what we will be saying about all of America in 20 short years. Texas and Nevada now more than 50 percent non white.

  • Carlito
    February 1, 2020 at 10:24 am

    Show me any city or town in America that’s predominately negroe and I’ll show you a shit hole

    God Bless President Donald J Trump

    • Salty Tears, eh
      February 1, 2020 at 10:56 am

      Which story was about you?

    • Hugh-Bo Mont
      February 1, 2020 at 11:54 am

      Color doesn’t matter. It has to with the govt party in control of the city. Show me a city controlled by Democrats that is a place where sane working class people want to move to and reside there. If you have a lot of money, you can live anywhere and insulate yourself from the inevitable riff-raff.

      • Four20hitman
        February 1, 2020 at 12:44 pm

        I think it’s the opposite. 17 out of the top 25 most dangerous cities are republican run from state level down. It significantly has to do with the racial make up of the city.

      • Carlito the spic
        February 1, 2020 at 10:42 pm

        Hugh
        You’re an ignorant asshole
        Negroe s ruin everything they touch

  • Four20hitman
    February 1, 2020 at 8:36 am

    At least they caught with their fists. Oh and a tripod. If that was here in Lawrence it would of been the white guy getting jumped by 1000 Dominicans and he still would of gotten shot. Worcester is moving up in the world. It’s still no Lowell though.

    • Four20hitman
      February 1, 2020 at 8:39 am

      Clearly I meant fought and got auto corrected. Before all the editors show up

  • Clown Culture
    February 1, 2020 at 7:18 am

    Of course that black guy jumped in when his ‘homie’ started losing the fight because blacks don’t fight fair

    • Carlito
      February 1, 2020 at 10:26 am

      Negroes are cowards they steal and they are stupid

      Other than that they’re ok

  • MR X
    January 31, 2020 at 11:15 pm

    Just when I think the Turtle has become a bit dull I come upon a pleasant surprise. Kung Shoe cracked me up. Thanks for the laughs..

    • Corinth Arkadin
      February 1, 2020 at 12:59 pm

      You got be in it for the long run, dawg.

  • Judge dread
    January 31, 2020 at 10:31 pm

    Find that location and white phosphorous / napalm everything within 5 blocks.

    About a year ago I was looking at apartment listings in downtown Worcester. So here’s this really nice old school building, right next to the park where the turtle boy is, the rent was something like $1800 a month. I mean the apartments are nice, but seriously?

    I could move back to manhattan and get a studio on the upper east side for that same price. Wtf is wrong with people paying big city prices in Worcester???

    • Judge dread
      January 31, 2020 at 10:38 pm

      Bragging about living in a $1800 month downtown Worcester apartment is like being the smartest kid with Down syndrome.

  • Jack
    Father Time
    January 31, 2020 at 10:16 pm

    That whole area, was a lot better off in 72. Now, forget about it.

    • Aspiring Street Rapper from the mean streets of Cohasset wearing a Bulls hat
      February 1, 2020 at 6:30 am

      Yeah,1872.

  • Principal John J O’Melee
    January 31, 2020 at 8:38 pm

    The renaissance has begun.

    Will they be serving “Real tomato catsup”at the ball park.

  • Hitting The Numbers
    January 31, 2020 at 7:19 pm

    They’re both in work clothes but only one of them looks like he’s been working.

    • whatevuh
      whatevuh
      February 1, 2020 at 7:34 am

      yup, the white guy LOL

  • No difference
    January 31, 2020 at 6:56 pm

    Pawtucket is a shithole too. Not like they moved the team from Weston. Pawtucket and Worcester can’t be all that different.

  • bigdaddy
    bigdaddy
    January 31, 2020 at 6:46 pm

    Have you ever been to a Pawsaox came ? The woo isnt much worse than Pawtucket

  • Two Patch Crappy Jack
    January 31, 2020 at 6:44 pm

    The things hard working people do on their lunch break!

  • Cockfarmer alarm
    January 31, 2020 at 6:40 pm

    This is what people are hiding in mom’s basement from. Cockfarmers.

  • Liawatha
    January 31, 2020 at 6:25 pm

    What I see is a WHITE MAN ASSAULTING not just ONE but TWO African American Gentlemen.
    Donald Trump and his Horrible Hate Speech Must Be stopped!!!

    • Liawatha
      January 31, 2020 at 6:26 pm

      Oops, forgot…
      The 2 African American Gents were on their way to work!!!
      I Just know it.

  • UPS Driver
    January 31, 2020 at 5:48 pm

    I’s was just makin a delivy y’all

  • Ron Jeremy's Son
    January 31, 2020 at 5:40 pm

    Does anybody really expect the white suburban families who are the PawSox fan base to go to the Worcester ballpark a second time? I don’t see it.

    Still promoting the neutron bomb idea. Think of the money we would save.

    • Mr Clean :-)
      January 31, 2020 at 5:51 pm

      Neutron bomb would spare the shitty buildings and failing infrastructure. You got the right idea but I’d advocate for a good old fashioned hydrogen bomb at least a megaton to ensure a deep down cleaning between the hills and crevices.

      • Ron Jeremy's Son
        January 31, 2020 at 6:03 pm

        You know, you are onto something. Plus the lingering radiation would keep the parasites from recolonizing Worcester. Or at least the survivors would check out in a week or two.

        Now that I think of it a Dresden style firebombing might be more fun to watch.

  • Nada
    January 31, 2020 at 5:37 pm

    PUT THE SUNGLASSES ON!!!!

  • dr. fill
    January 31, 2020 at 5:28 pm

    I rooted for the White guy.

  • ChrisInShrewsbury
    ChrisInShrewsbury
    January 31, 2020 at 5:27 pm

    Casual Observation:

    Amazing that Big Papi happened to be walking down the street to break up the fight.

  • Planet Of The Apes
    January 31, 2020 at 4:46 pm

    Typical sons of obama filthy naggers. 2 on 1. Kicking monkey got his ass kicked.

  • Ann M. Elk
    January 31, 2020 at 4:42 pm

    Ahhhh, The social justice warriors at channel 5 got a real live scoop, A couple of the constituents behaving like normal.

  • Chip Striker
    January 31, 2020 at 4:41 pm

    3rd man in hate crime penalty for the brother strolling by on his day off.

    Blow up the ghettoes!!

  • Long wait for the stadium
    January 31, 2020 at 4:37 pm

    Looks fake to me. Someone told these guys to pretend to be fighting, for the camera. No punches landed, deliberately. Reminds me of those old TV shows when the members of the rock band would lip sync, the electric guitars wouldn’t have cords and wouldn’t be plugged in, and the drummer would be hitting the air instead of the cymbals. Wait for the real video to be posted on some Worcester gang’s FB page.

    • juror seven esq.
      February 1, 2020 at 11:10 am

      Send that tape to WWE and refer to it as a tryout tape. May very well result in a contract offer.

  • Massholio
    January 31, 2020 at 4:22 pm

    Had to go to some conference at the Dunkie featuring Crash Murray and Small Deval. For some reason it felt like I had to walk a mile to the Dunkie from the garage , then I had to walk another mile inside the Dunkie to get to the conference. It was Worcester weather, dark and threatening, and all the sidewalks were ripped up and surrounded by yellow crime tape. There was no traffic. Like I was forced to be there. Nobody goes to Worcester voluntarily.

    • Dunkin Donuts 4eva
      January 31, 2020 at 9:00 pm

      Downvote for calling it “Dunkie.”

  • Spic Tormentor
    January 31, 2020 at 4:10 pm

    Big day for timberlands on TB today.

    They must be a new sponsor.

    Makes sense since 73% of all timbs have been purchased by funds that originated from a welfare check.

    A not-so-close second behind Jordans in ratchet footwear

  • Huh?
    January 31, 2020 at 4:04 pm

    The white guy will be charged with a hate crime and civil rights violation.

  • It’s Always OK To Attack Whitey
    January 31, 2020 at 4:00 pm

    As anyone who grew up in the city can tell you, if a white man starts winning a fight with a black, ALL blacks will jump on the white man.
    Whether they know the other boon or not, if the white guy is simply defending himself from an attack, it doesn’t matter. Blacks HATE to see a white man on top. Even if he’s helping out a black, they’ll always side against whitey.

    • hartf811
      F*U
      January 31, 2020 at 6:54 pm

      White men will always be on top!
      It’s called privilege and it never goes away.

      • Filthy nagers and spics
        January 31, 2020 at 11:55 pm

        The privilege to work 3 jobs to support lazy spics and jigs for decades and decades and decades

        • hartf811
          You’re going about this wrong
          February 1, 2020 at 2:17 pm

          Gotta OWN slaves not be one.

          • Diversity Is One Big Lie
            February 2, 2020 at 2:45 pm

            You have to ship them back to the homeland or call in the big guns like the Orkin Man

    • Startled Pancake
      February 1, 2020 at 1:32 pm

  • Emily
    January 31, 2020 at 3:55 pm

    JMO …But that ballfield may be more trouble than it’s worth. It’s not, I repeat NOT going to fix things in Worcester.
    I was never a fan of this to start with and I realize I am the in the minority.

    • minority report
      January 31, 2020 at 9:05 pm

      Emily – You appear to have a brain in your head and can use proper grammar. THAT means you are a minority in Worcester.

      • Emily
        February 1, 2020 at 6:11 am

        Thank you

  • hartf811
    Honest Abe
    January 31, 2020 at 3:54 pm

    I got an Idea; Lets build a ballpark there to bring in white money! Yeah that will work to the revitalization of the hairy armpit called Woosta.
    They would have been better off building it in Stockbridge and put in “White Only” on the seats and water fountains.

  • Ratchetsaurous Rex
    January 31, 2020 at 3:50 pm

    Gotta love the woo. I love the ballet spin Kung Shoe was doing. A spin and a miss. Meanwhile, camera man films it and doesn’t try to stop it until his tripod is fucked with HAHAHA

  • That’s my crack
    January 31, 2020 at 3:50 pm

    I am so jealous! We never get fun like this in St Louis. And to think I’ve been paying all these years to go to a good match. You guys are lucky.

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