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Huffington Post: An 18-year-old Florida man has been arrested for allegedly operating a fake medical practice. Malachi A. Love-Robinson is accused of seeing patients at his New Birth New Life Medical Center and Urgent Care in West Palm Beach, where he lists himself as president, CEO and founder, according to the Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office.

The agency said he was investigated by the Florida Department of Health in October and cited for practicing medicine without a license. The sheriff’s office said an undercover agent visited the clinic on Tuesday and was given a physical exam and medical advice by the would-be Doogie Howser, who posted several pictures of him with his staff on Facebook:

He was arrested and charged with practicing medicine without a license. The Department of Health also issued several citations, the sheriff’s office said.

“I’m hurt because of all of these allegations,” Love-Robinson told WPBF, the local ABC station, as he was led away in handcuffs. “But this is not the first time I have been accused and I will pursue this, and when I do, you will be the first to know.”

His clinic says on its Facebook page that it offers “state of the art medical care with the usage of Naturopathic Medicine and Holistic Services.”

According to Love-Robinson’s personal Facebook page, he claims to have certificates from the American Alternative Medical Association and the American Association of Drugless Physicians, both of which are dated Oct. 5, 2015.

So this is pretty much the greatest story we’ve ever seen. This kid got caught pretending to be a doctor, not once, but twice. Last year it was gynecology, which is probably coming on a little too strong if you’re a fake doctor. Kind of makes it look like you’re just a creep that wants to touch boobies. Now that he’s a year older and wiser he went the holistic route. Because honestly, what the hell is the difference between this kid and a holistic healer? Basically he’s seeing people for depression and ADHD and stuff like that, so he just tells them to go get some pills. He’s no different than your average greedy pharmaceutical company.

The best part is that there were no shortage of people who believed him. And somehow he even owned his own practice and had real employees. I mean, it looks somewhat legit:

This is the most Florida thing that has ever happened.

The best part about it is how he’s denying it. I mean, it’s one hell of a prank. It’s dangerous, don’t get me wrong, but impressive nonetheless. But at this point he’s caught so you’d think he’d give up. Not Malachi Love-Robinson though. Oh no. His press conference after he was released from jail was FANTASTIC!!!

“I am deeply saddened and disrespected by some of the things that have come forth.”

Love it. He got caught red handed and his initial reaction is to turn it around on the press. You have to admit, the kid is pretty eloquent and he’s well spoken. If I went into my doctor’s office and this guy showed up and told me to get naked, I’d probably get naked. He sells it very well.

But wait, it gets better:

Love-Robinson refused to admit on air that he’s completely unqualified. He toldABC News he does hold a Ph.D. in…something…but said he doesn’t “feel comfortable” saying what.

“That is not the issue here,” the kid quack said.

“There are many types of degrees out there that hold the title as doctor, whether they are a physicist or an engineer,” he said.

“Just because someone has the title doctor in front of their name does not necessarily imply M.D.”

Brilliant. I totally have a PhD, but I never said I was like, a “doctor” “doctor.” I meant it like how Joyce McNickles and Sonya Conner call themselves doctors. He’s kind of got a point though. I mean, if Sarai Rivera can call herself a pastor, and Bruce Jenner can call himself a woman, then why can’t this kid call himself a doctor? Oh wait, what’s that? You say he also pretends to be a pastor?

Love-Robinson also claimed to be a minister on at the New Birth Outreach, saying he “is an ordained minister and an Honorary Doctoral Alumni in the ULife Church as we’ll as COGIC and specializes in philosophical theology, religious epistemology, and Christian apologetics. His doctoral thesis at the ULC, explored the paradoxical nature of certain Christian doctrines and the implications for the rationality of Christian faith.”

Smart kid right there. You never have to pay any taxes and the city doesn’t fine you when you burn down your own church and then never shovel the sidewalk in the winter.

As for his medical training, he insisted he had “shadowed many doctors” — as well as “a lot of things” he didn’t detail.

“I have been studying this particular field for a while,” he said.

“May not have been eight years, nine years, 10 years, but it has been long enough to, I would say, justify what I do.”

Yea, sure I don’t have any fancy degrees or training or anything. But I’ve been watching tons of Scrubs reruns. I’m basically an expert at this point.

My attorney’s are working around the clock.”

LOL. Definitely kid. Definitely. I’m sure his lawyers are about as real as his PhD.

You would think that this kid’s family members would tell him to shut up and go to his room. Maybe lay low for a while instead of continuing to speak and making yourself look like more and more of a putz. But then again, this is a kid whose family allowed him to play fake doctor for a couple years and never confiscated his stethoscope. That’s why Grandpa is actually speaking out in his defense:

“He’s not out doing drugs, he’s not out trying to rob nobody. He’s trying to do something constructive, and if he did do something and the paperwork wasn’t right — he can get ahead of himself sometimes and he may have been trying too hard, but he had good intentions.” 

Yea, what’s the big deal guys? It’s just a simple paperwork issue. Someone probably just forgot to sign one of the documents. Last time we let Mosaic do our bookkeeping!! So he’s swindling some old people out of cash and endangering every person who came to him for medical advice. Big deal. At least he’s not selling drugs. Because the only two options that 18 year old boys have in life are selling drugs and annointing themselves the black Doogie Howser.

Here’s the best part:

The teen has yet to appear in court. He has denied all accusations of wrongdoing and vowed to open another clinic soon.

You think a little arrest and some national public shaming is gonna stop this fake doctor from fixing people? Think again. You haven’t seen the last of Dr. Malachi Love-Robinson.

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