BLT-123 Pretends To Be Hate Crime Victim For GFM Scam, Uncle Turtleboy Calls Out Former Students, Ratchet Hockey Dads, And Much More On Longest YouTube Live Show Ever

Follow and Subscribe to Turtleboy podcasts on SoundCloud or iTunes by clicking here

Follow and like the Turtleboy Sports Returns, and Clarence Woods Emerson to keep up with the hilarious turtle rider commentary.

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information.

If you like free speech and want to support what we’re doing, feel free to donate to the Turtle fund:








Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 



Our first ever Turtleboy Live show on YouTube was a huge success. The audience was just as big as Facebook and I think it’s safe to say that we will never do a Facebook Live show again. This was the longest episode of Turtleboy Live I’ve ever hosted. We didn’t have any ratchet call-ins, but it was real, quality, important conversations with Bristo and Bret. Topics included out of control hockey parents, a BLT-123 making BANK by pretending to be the victim of a hate crime, the return of a Revere ratchet, Bristol’s defense of Cape Cod, and Uncle Turtleboy taking on a former student turned drag queen. Definitely listen to this with your family while you’re sippin hot cocoa around the fire on Christmas.



11 Comment(s)
  • Natasha
    December 29, 2018 at 10:50 am

    You didn’t get “Dyler Turden”…. that’s hilarious

  • Now What
    December 23, 2018 at 6:35 pm

    You don’t need to scour the internet trying to find out who I am Bristol.
    You intrigue me. I’ll happily meet you and take you out for dinner after the New Year just to listen to your views. I’ll even order extra bread and look away while you stuff the bread and silverware into your bag.

  • Now What
    December 23, 2018 at 6:20 pm

    Maybe I’m stuck inside of some sort of reality loop hole but you have Uncle turtle who has no kids and has probably never gotten laid unless he paid for it, Bristol who probably has 6 kids from different baby daddies and Brett who I believe has had sex with a woman but still believes No means Yes are ragging on this woman’s sex life who has three kids she takes care of and her husband most likely got a vasectomy.
    Leave these people alone.
    The only thing they are guilty of is asking how their tax money is spent? God forbid

  • Dr. T. Boyd
    December 23, 2018 at 2:20 pm

    Has there been any word on those 3 hard-on hockey parents.

  • Now What
    December 23, 2018 at 12:20 pm

    I can’t get enough of Bristol, she’s my favorite.
    She’s like I can’t believe people like Beverly who feel entitled because she owns 4 properties, two in Chatham but she’s only here for the summer vacation (because Beverly and her husband obviously work hard all year and like to buy investment property).

    They (The nice taxpaying family) are pushing all my friends out who provide power to their houses so now they are busing people in from Fall River and that makes crime go up….??huh??

    I’m actually laughing because then these idiots start attacking her sex life and are sure she sucks in bed (in the picture of her family it shows three happy kids so maybe there is a secret kinky side to this hard working, property investing mother of three that we don’t know about)?

  • Comedy Gold
    December 23, 2018 at 11:41 am

    I love this site because it’s hilarious!

    This is the first podcast I’ve listened to and to be honest it was great even though I only listened to parts.

    For those who don’t have time to listen to it I’ll try to break it down. (In my screechiest voice Uncle Turtleboy) You say you don’t like pop ups well I ask you how many Turtleboy hoodies have you bought? How many times do you press the paypal button??? Now (my most SJW girls voice for Bristol) Tourism!! Tourists are what are destroying Cape Cod!!! The tourists are filthy, rich and every morning they go riding their bikes getting exercise and they make me sick? Now the rent for a 2 bedroom Apt. is maybe $1600??? That’s like downtown Boston rent!!!! Even daycare for all your kids is expensive??? That’s crazy. ( Now my I really don’t care voice Brett) Um yeah, sure I’d knuckle fuck her and give her the tip.
    Great stuff

    It’s really great please keep them coming

  • Judge Dread
    December 23, 2018 at 11:23 am

    i used to listen to the TBS podcast for the live show usually on Monday while I’m driving to work. That was because they only FB lived streamed and I wiped my FB account years ago. Now that they are on Youtube live streaming, if i’m around i’ll tune in. Otherwise I will just podcast it.

  • whatevuh
    December 23, 2018 at 9:52 am

    So, people actually stay home on a Saturday night and listen to this? Really?

  • Wun Hung Lo
    December 23, 2018 at 9:45 am

    Longest You Tube live show ever. And how many shows has there been?

  • Diane Woods emerson
    December 23, 2018 at 8:28 am

    The ap is great and easy. I get the blogs, it’s easy to listen to the recorded pods, and literally one pop up.
    Plus the turtle is on my home page with great icon.

  • Diane Woods emerson
    December 23, 2018 at 8:12 am

    I am sooo pissed that I missed a 2 hour show. Wtf. I fell asleep. Lol

Comment on this Post


Turtleboy Tuesdays Podcasts From 100.1 FM The Pike
Tuesday’s With Turtleboy Podcast, Round 3
Turtleboy Tuesdays Talks Webster Cop Video, Baby Gangsta