Hoodrat Heroes

Bristol Blarney Brought Her Crotch Fruit And A Creepy Auditor Who Said Sexual Things Onto Her Show To Talk About Who She Thinks Her Real Dad Is

 

Bristol Blarney has been eliminated from Ratchet Madness, but her ratchetry apparently has continued on her bootleg Turtleboy spinoff “Masshole Report.” It’s basically a “show” where her and fellow recovering junkie Mike “Masshole Mitch”, who works for the town of Reading, mock and obsess over Josh Abrams and other losers who go around filming the police. No one who calls or comments is from around here, and it’s now filled with creepy looking dudes who come on their “panels” to mock the only people in the world who they think are beneath them.

And did I mention Bristol Blarney brought her crotch fruit on the other night to be oggled by these weirdos? Keep in mind, this is the same daughter who has spent her entire life bouncing from one foster home to another because her Mom continued to choose junkie dick and booze over her. The same daughter who Kate routinely neglects so she can do her YouTube show. The same daughter who’s forced to come along to the filming of the shows. The same daughter who suspiciously got a bunch of bruises that doctors and police came from either Bristol Blarney or her Bristol Blarney’s emasculated boyfriend Andrew H. Johnson, prompting DCF to open up yet another case on Bristol Blarney.

Here she is bringing her daughter onto the show last night to mock some mentally disabled auditing freak.

Bristol Blarney: “My daughter just walked by and wants to say something about him and she’s not gonna leave me alone until she can.”

Neglected Crotch Fruit: “So, my Dad left me, and I think that man is my Dad.”

Bristol Blarney: “That’s why Rick left.”

Sorry kid, that man isn’t addicted to heroin, so there’s no way your Mom would ever spread her legs for him. Plus, he’s not willing to be abused or demeaned for prolonged periods of time, which is largely why he’s not around. That plus the fact that your Mom got him hooked on crack after conceiving you at his mother’s house and living their rent free is the real reason he’s not around. Your grandmother really wants to establish a relationship with you. You might remember her as the lady who raised you in your formative years. Yea, your Mom doesn’t want her around because she might actually pay attention to you, and won’t use you as a prop in her YouTube videos.

I guess some things never change. When Kate briefly had custody of the poor girl in 2012 when the girl was 5 and Kate was trying to become a YouTube personality without the benefit of using an established platform like Turtleboy, she forced the girl to call her a retard and laugh at her at the 1:31 mark.

Keep in mind that a few days later DCF raided the section 8 ratchet den on a tip, found that she was neglecting that crotch fruit and the other one that the state didn’t take from her yet, and took those two back as well. Two days later Bristol Blarney went to Target and pretended to be 6 months pregnant and looking for the abortion bill or a coat hanger.

Then they brought on this creep:

He’s an auditor named Michael Malloy who has his own YouTube show and is buddies with Kate’s good friend Josh Abrams.

They’ve since edited the video, but he made a comment about her daughter being hot and wanting her to come on the show. You can see the commenter Jimmy mention it around the time he made the statement.

In hindsight the two kids who were forcefully taken from her against her will by the state were the lucky ones. Bristol Blarney is raising this girl to be exactly like her.

Anyway, Kate also continues to whine about me “e-begging” despite the fact that she lives in section 8 housing, has collected welfare most of her adult life, gladly accepts donations for her “show” where her daughter gets sexualized by a creepy auditor, including one sugar daddy who donated $300 last week during a show, and has a Patreon page where you  pay $25 a month and in return she mentions your name on her show, gives you special privileges in Discord, and you get to write blogs for her website that you won’t be compensated for. 

You can also give her $2 for coffee, give her $5 for nothing, or give her $15 for her to say your name but NOT force you to write a blog on her website for free.

I know Kate is too much of a coward to ever debate me, but if Mike “Masshole Mitch” from Reading wants to come on, he’s always invited. He had a lot to say when it all first went down.

Anyway, this has motivated me to get the Bristol Blarney series started again. Stay tuned for Part 6.

 

 

Please consider supporting local journalism by donating to the Turtle fund:




Follow us on Youtube, SoundCloud, Twitter, and Facebook.

Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 

 

51 Comment(s)
  • Judge dread
    April 29, 2020 at 1:49 pm

    In that video she is high as fuck. She’s jacked up on meth or cocaine or some type of designer drug. Then shit talks her daughter. No wonder why she doesn’t have custody of her kids. If ur single I can understand doing drugs and partying but if u have kids u have to step up.

  • randiguy2006
    Curious
    April 29, 2020 at 11:02 am

    Do you charge this woman rent for living in your head?

  • Captain Trips
    Captain Trips
    April 29, 2020 at 10:07 am

    That Malloy weirdo looks like he died 6 months ago but his brain hasn’t figured that out yet

  • J£WS DRINK THE BLOOD OF WHITE CHILDREN
    April 29, 2020 at 6:59 am

    The ADL was created by B’nai B’rith to defend a famous J£wish pedophile named Leo Frank. He raped and murdered a 13 year old white girl named Mary Phagan and tried to blame it on a black man.

  • Boo Hoo
    Blarney's BFF
    April 29, 2020 at 3:31 am

    Valid question: After reading those types of messages from her, why would you still think she is anything above a total ratchet?

    I’m not sick of the drama, because it’s legit. This gutterslug not only played the game, she got in and wrote it, exploited it, and now is trying to become the new TB. Who in their right mind enjoys her shows, or believes her bullshit, OR stands by someone as scummy as her? She’s a disgusting mess.

    I genuinely feel bad for her children (the ones that have to live with her).

    P.S. How many times do you think that skag sucked on big bitch tit’s micropenis? My bet is on at least twice, plus at least once with Camel Tow Truck Girl

  • Silencio Dogood
    April 28, 2020 at 10:53 pm

    Katherine will soon become jealous of the attention her daughter is getting, if she isn’t already, and is apt to put the moves on her daughter’s boyfriends as she sags further into the face she’s earned. that poor kid(s) never had a chance and will spin wildly dervish out of control, and into drugs, abuse and her mother’s insanity. too sad.

    • Katie The Kunty
      April 29, 2020 at 3:58 am

      How much money we throwing down on that? I’ll put up my entire stimulus check.

      • Silencio Dogood
        April 29, 2020 at 10:50 pm

        um, i already spent mine on coffee and speed.

  • Cooledge St Revere
    April 28, 2020 at 8:29 pm

    Just tell me when the josh and kates pornhub video comes out. I just know those 2 are gonna bang to a billy bags rap song in the background

  • Get Kate
    April 28, 2020 at 6:58 pm

    Save webpages on archive dot it and show she is accepting the money and show the government

  • No
    April 28, 2020 at 6:50 pm

    they can wear a bandanna- anything. don’t have to be a mask

  • Section 8 calling``
    April 28, 2020 at 5:15 pm

    I agree the Section 8 people should be notified. It should be easy to find out what she is spending on her website, and what money if any she is receiving from it. On the other hand, maybe the Section 8 people haven’t gone after her because they assume she is an illegal. The election is some six months away and every illegal, er, Dem. vote is important.

  • Lol they call him uncle
    April 28, 2020 at 5:13 pm

    TB goes after his niece like this and a lot of his nephews are defending him. This is why Massachusetts has become the gay state.

  • Sugar Daddy Malloy
    April 28, 2020 at 5:03 pm

    Don’t mind the broken blinds on my window they are just like that because I look at all the cute little boys and girls in the neighborhood hoping they become like Josh and Kate.Oh don’t pay any attention to the crusted up face cloth by the window either.

  • Real feel good story
    April 28, 2020 at 4:41 pm

    Sounds like Bristols web company is really taking off and she’s making money while reconciling with her children.
    It’s nice to read a positive story about someone who made big mistakes in their past and are now making things right.
    Good for her and thanks for the update.

    • Nice try
      April 28, 2020 at 4:43 pm

      This is what’s known as “gaslighting”.

      • Sociopathic warfare
        May 1, 2020 at 10:19 am

        Good eye

    • jobrienxxx176
      Name Change ?
      April 28, 2020 at 9:22 pm

      Liawatha ? Is that you ?

  • Judge dread
    April 28, 2020 at 4:23 pm

    After two minutes I couldn’t watch. When her daughter showed up it made me almost spit puke.

    She’s rocking back and forth like she’s on meth or coke or something.

    • Silencio Dogood
      April 28, 2020 at 10:56 pm

      PTSD.

  • TortugaNiño
    April 28, 2020 at 3:59 pm

    Whats it gonna take to motivate you to finish your other abandoned series?

    • DudeRanchStripClub
      April 29, 2020 at 8:54 am

      This is partly your fault and anyone else who encouraged the Bristol Bashing. If you jamokes didn’t champion this nonsense after blog 12 then we’d have a full Steele series.

  • Sir Wilfred Death
    April 28, 2020 at 3:49 pm

    Uncle, you can pursue any sort of revenge or even legal action against an enemy. That is your right.

    The fact is that you are hurting your brand. This holds very little interest for most of us. There are so many more interesting ratchets to expose.

    This is the last time I’ll ask you to move on. I’m just going to skip any blog about this woman going forward.

    Social Media is Cancer

    • Quiet Down
      April 28, 2020 at 4:10 pm

      The vast majority of readers seem to enjoy reading about her. Your attempt to control the situation is pretty pathetic. There are plenty of stories I skip over, I don’t need to comment every time I don’t find a story interesting. You couldn’t be more obvious if you tried.

    • whatevuh
      whatevuh
      April 28, 2020 at 5:06 pm

      Took the words right out of my mouth, this guy gets hung up on things, and he just can’t fucking let go. Enough is enough, I haven’t read a single blog about Bristol or Kirk Minahane he’s fucking obsessed

    • Stewart Nod
      April 28, 2020 at 11:19 pm

      Dearest “Sir” Wilfred,
      I’m a bit confused, pops; are you in control of the content for this blog? Were you nominated by the readers to speak for us? No…and no.
      Going forward, kindly shut your f**king mouth when you aren’t interested in the subject matter. It’s incredibly simple. Let’s go over this:
      1. See an article you’re not interested in.
      2. Don’t read said article.
      3. (Most importantly), shut the f**k up.
      Best,
      Stewart

  • Asstastic
    April 28, 2020 at 3:30 pm

    Yo my man is O B S E S S E D
    with Bristol lmao

  • Bristie Delgado
    April 28, 2020 at 3:29 pm

    I wonder where she came up with that multi-tiered “pay me for nothing” donation schedule…

  • Turtz McGurtz
    April 28, 2020 at 3:27 pm

    If Uncle T is obsessed with Bristol, and Bristol is obsessed with Josh Abrams, does that mean Uncle T is obsessed with Abrams?

    • WTF
      April 28, 2020 at 3:59 pm

      Thats a gross human centipede

  • Whackos En Route
    April 28, 2020 at 3:16 pm

    I love how Bristol’s weird army of cult wives swarm any article and try to pretend that TB is the obsessed one because of an article every now and then. It’s like their only line “OMG you must be obsessed!”.

  • Fucking Pathetic
    April 28, 2020 at 2:58 pm

    You creeped an entire show to find a 28 second clip of a kid making a joke about herself? Wow. Also, that video wasn’t edited. The live chat is still there, wouldn’t be were it edited. Your obsession is sad. You lose. Get over it and cut your losses before they get worse.

    • STFU
      April 30, 2020 at 5:54 pm

      No Kate Peter,
      You are pathetic.

  • Envy
    April 28, 2020 at 2:52 pm

    “No one who calls or comments is from around here”.
    Do you mean she actually has a following outside her area code?
    Jealous?

  • DudeRanchStripClub
    April 28, 2020 at 2:22 pm

    You should do a blog on some guy that short changed you once, or about a dickhead that cut you off. You can endlessly rant about it. For fucks sake, just finish the Steele series.

  • Frank Rizzo
    April 28, 2020 at 2:07 pm

    why does she not have ankles?

  • Col. Harland Sanders
    April 28, 2020 at 2:03 pm

    That’s a family-sized bucket of crazy

  • randiguy2006
    really?
    April 28, 2020 at 2:01 pm

    This is just sad, TB.

    Let it go.

  • Masshole report sucks.
    April 28, 2020 at 1:52 pm

    So who in the IRS or Mass section 8 folks do we contact because she sure as fuck aint reporting this income?
    I love how they block people who disagree with them. Bunch of blue waffled cunt muffins.

    • Jeff J
      And The Award Goes To......
      April 28, 2020 at 3:50 pm

      Not sure where you got it but you sir win ‘Best Made Up Disparaging Comment of the Day’ for “blue waffled cunt muffins”. Instant classic.

  • HTTG
    April 28, 2020 at 1:52 pm

    What a low life cunt pimping her own daughter out.

  • Jennifer Drake
    JJ
    April 28, 2020 at 1:51 pm

    Hahaha! Just when you are positive she can’t be anymore of a disgusting trash bag of a person she outdoes herself!

  • I See Dumb People
    I see dumb people
    April 28, 2020 at 1:41 pm

    And its shit like this that should have guaranteed her the #1 spot in Ratchet Madness.. I honestly think her and her “crew” were stalking the page and trying to vote as many times as possible for her competition so she wouldn’t advance.. I mean honestly could she be anymore ratchet?

  • Daniel Sullivan
    Sprinkle Pig
    April 28, 2020 at 1:31 pm

    And the Kate Peter Crew shows up in full force. Lol again imagine hitching your wagon to this dead beat thinking that of all people Kate Peter is the one I should follow. Lol what kind of loser do you have to be to continue to hang around someone as low as she is. Someone who if honestly died tomorrow would leave people better off than they are with her alive. Myself as a tax payer would be happy. Considering she milks every government assistance possible. Her kids (the two that got fucked and had to stay with her) would be better off. The next heroin addict she tricks into fucking her doesn’t know it yet but will be better off. The list goes on and on. She is a disgusting waste of life. What a relief it would be.

    • Ego
      April 28, 2020 at 2:07 pm

      I’ll confess, I took the Bristol road after the breakup. But it got old real fast. Boring, no loyalty and I was gone.
      Now I heard Unk wants apologies on people’s knees to get back in his good graces. So here goes.
      Dear Unk, you can suck my dick. Bristol may be boring, but you’re an obsessed mental patient. You just can’t let it go.she doesn’t mention you..( maybe that’s why her discord is so boring)
      No I like to scan your articles and laugh.
      You’re beyond help.
      You’re oh what’s the word OBSESSED.
      Get over her. I have.

      • Jennifer Drake
        JJ
        April 28, 2020 at 3:08 pm

        A lot of us won’t be done with the trash heap known as Kate until she’s arrested, in jail, fined or all of the above. She’s not just ratchet, she’s criminal and has never been held responsible for it.

        • Dumb idiots
          April 28, 2020 at 7:38 pm

          This bitch is lucky she didn’t get shot in the head for the shit she did to tb. Of course he’s still going to write about her

  • Twattle Boy
    April 28, 2020 at 1:12 pm

    Didn’t read it but,
    Lemme guess.
    Bristol blah blah blah
    Obsessed
    Blah blah blah
    Bad mother
    Blah blah blah
    FOR GOD SAKES SOMEBODY GET THIS GUY SOMR HELP.

  • Jordis
    April 28, 2020 at 1:07 pm

    It would be wise to sterilize her unfortunate sexually transmitted creations out of need for attention, offsprings now. Stop the fucked up line dead in its tracks. Save the system so much money in the end.

  • george costanza
    The angry taint
    April 28, 2020 at 12:46 pm

    Didn’t read it. Dude cut the cord and let it go

  • Obvious
    April 28, 2020 at 12:43 pm

    Triggered much TurtleNerd?

Comment on this Post

*

RELATED POSTS
All-Star Worcester Parents Lay Siege To School Bus, Beat Up Bus Driver, Then Write Magnificent Things On Facebook
Comments From The Worcester Parent Bus Riot Blog Were Borderline Orgasmic
Hot Girl Threatening To Sue Turtleboy Sports Over Busgate, City Council Still Hasn’t Even Mentioned It