Mainstream Media Fails

Clive McFarlane Going After Turtleboy Sponsors And Readers Now

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It’s become apparent that we have basically freaked the shit out of The Establishment. In the past 48 hours things have really heated up for Turtleboy Enterprises. Thanks to my boy Clive we got a whole bunch of new readers ready to ride the turtle to the end of the earth.

What’s funny is he didn’t really think the column through. Like, what did he think would happen? He thought we would just up and quit because he said I was tossing filth around in the sewer? The sad part is he really does think that. He’s that delusional to think that people actually like him. Seriously. That’s the only logical conclusion one can reach.

Now that he realizes he can’t stop the TBS Revolution he’s playing the only card left in his hand – going after our sponsors and supporters. In today’s column, which I’m not gonna link because I’m sick of giving that numbnuts traffic, he tried to take a big steamy dump on City Councilor Mike Gaffney.

Ya knew that one was coming after Gaffney got the ball rolling last week by demanding a police presence at North High School. As you know, Clive hates the cops because he’s been arrested more than once by Worcester Police officers. Which of course makes them racist.


The biggest irony of last night’s school committee meeting was when the teacher’s supporters in the upper balcony started chanting “fire Boone,” Mayor Joe Petty banged his gavel and said that if people couldn’t respect the superintendent then they would be removed by the police.

Ya got that? Melinda Boone and Joe Petty need police protection from teachers and parents voicing their concerns, but students, teachers, and administrators at North High need NO protection from police. After all, according to Worcester’s town crier Tracy Novick, that would be an “armed encampment.” Because apparently 80 teachers with signs is a much bigger security threat than 1,400 teenagers.

Anyway, Clive apparently doesn’t like the fact that Gaffney shared one of our blogs on his Facebook page about North High:

Yet Mr. Gaffney has more than once posted links on his Facebook account to the ramblings of one of the vilest bloggers in the city. I asked him Wednesday to explain himself. He essentially said he was a well-read politician, before hanging up on me.


First of all, I’ve never met Mike Gaffney before. We haven’t officially endorsed him yet because there’s a long way to go until November. But since when does Mike Gaffney owe an “explanation” to Clive McFarlane about what he chooses to read in his free time? How fucking stupid is this jerk whistle? Would you like to know what he and his wife talked about over dinner? How bout his shoe size?

I’m convinced at this point that Clive is trying to get Gaffney elected mayor. It’s the only thing that makes sense. Like, he has to know that no one likes him except a handful of hippies right? Therefore anyone he comes after automatically gets the Clive touch of gold. It worked for Turtleboy, and chances are it’s probably gonna work for Gaffney too.

The most ironic part about this is that Clive is supposedly a “journalist.” Yet he doesn’t seem to like free speech very much at all. How much real estate do Turtleboy own in your head right now Clive? Do yo wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat after dreaming about getting bit by my magical turtle?

And of course it wouldn’t be a Clive column if he didn’t call someone racist:

But it is clear now that the vile, venomous and at times racist statements being made anonymously on social media are often embraced by leading community members.

See, I don’t get the racist thing. I would challenge ANYONE to find one single blog that we wrote which is racist. But of course they won’t do that because they have no intention of backing up any of their allegations. Not their style. Perhaps it was our support for Derrick Gordon – the first openly gay college basketball player from UMass, who just so happens to be black. Maybe it was the fact that we didn’t care for the Lunenburg parents who spray painted racist grafiti on their own house, blamed it on the high school football team, and accused the entire town of being racist so their kid could go to Leominster High School and play for the better football team. Then again maybe it was the fact that we called the peaceful Ferguson protesters dooshnozzles for disrupting a World War 2 veterans award ceremony on his 100th birthday.


Ya see, it doesn’t matter if it’s true or not. If they say it enough times then it becomes fact to hippies like Clive. Because when you don’t have anything of substance to say, then you just call people names.

As a matter of fact I’m 99.9% sure Clive is emailing our sponsors and telling them the same thing. I had two of them message me today to tell me they’ve gotten emails from “customers” who say they’re no longer doing business with them because of their association with Turtleboy Sports. That’s the only move Clive has left. He can’t get us to stop so he’s trying to turn the community against us.

Well, it’s not gonna work Clive, because Turtleboy Nation ain’t gonna let that happen. If you REALLY wanna stick it to Clive support our sponsors. Get a nice pasta dinner at Dell’ovs, a cleaning from Dr. McCarthy, a tattoo from Zaza Ink, a new car from North End Motor Sales, a clean living room from Anna’s Cleaning, get in shape with Crossfit Worcester, sell your old car to Car Heaven, get legal advice from Mike Erlich or Tony Salerno, get some car insurance from JJM, some barbecue chicken from Smokestack Urban Barbecue, grab a brew-ski at the Union Tavern, get touched up at The Buzz, get a new water heater from Scavone Plumbing, or a fresh sandwich at Weepin Willie’s.

Ride the turtle.

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16 Comment(s)
  • G-Love478
    March 12, 2015 at 9:20 am

    Ok, well then I’m going to START doing business with these places because they DO sponsor TBS!!!!

  • RJ
    March 7, 2015 at 8:07 pm

    Are you telling me the T&G is still in operation? The last time I actually saw one, Drew Bledsoe was starting his rookie year.

  • Non Sequitor
    March 7, 2015 at 6:02 pm

    Dear TB, please fix this quote:

    The most ironic part about this is that Clive is supposedly a “journalist.”

    He is NOT a journalist. He is a columnist. He is the Joker in the King’s Court, the clown car in the circus, the kid who picks up the tee after a kickoff.

    That’s why he is allowed to lie, distort facts, not do any research and be wrong. He has race baited (and now click baited) for so long that even Jim Normandin is afraid to fire him (what could be worse than going back to Leominster?)

    So call Clickbait Clive what he is.

  • Yes
    March 6, 2015 at 10:01 pm

    I can’t think of anything I would hate more in this world than having to be from, and spend my entire life in Worcester. Seriously, guys- how depressing is that?

    • Finnish Goalie
      March 7, 2015 at 7:45 am

      • Yes
        March 7, 2015 at 11:34 am

        Knew I could count on you

    • Dave
      March 7, 2015 at 1:16 pm

      I don’t particularly care for Brockton. Therefore I don’t read and comment on every single post on a Brockton blog.

  • Shaking my head
    March 6, 2015 at 8:34 pm

    Carlo Baldino actually wrote on his blog today that the problems at North High are because Obama and Boone are black. And he really believes it and would like you to believe it, too.

    I also stopped reading the T and G years ago strictly because I could not read one more story by Clive about racism…every single story….stopped even before his DUI and distaste for the police.

  • dkp
    March 6, 2015 at 8:33 pm

    Clive was always a racist douche.. I expect he’ll die one. The t&g won’t be around for too much longer, when it goes, clive will be gone, too.

  • Megan DaSilva
    March 6, 2015 at 8:09 pm

    I am willing to put money that good old Clive had some people make a few phone calls. Honestly, no one dislikes riding the turtle. It’s satiric truths with a blatantly honest witty and sarcastic verbiage, that’s just pure genius. You report what the majority of Americans think in the tone that reflects the people’s frustration build-up! Fuck Clive, this is why my subscription will stay canceled!!!

    • Wabbitt
      March 8, 2015 at 12:41 am

      More likely it was Clive and whatever intern is picking up his dry cleaning that called those sponsors.

  • Fist
    March 6, 2015 at 6:25 pm

    Just let him keep doing his thing, I imagine the T&G will can him as soon as they realize he’s fucking their reputation. Clive has bit off more than he can chew! Mess with the Turtle and you get SHELLED!

  • SUL
    March 6, 2015 at 5:54 pm

    It’s time for the turtle riders to turn the tables, let’s flood the T&G with emails disparinging Jive McFarlane. I cancelled my subscription with the papa per back in January, I will not do buisness with a race bAiter who makes accusations without cause, nor the newspaper that supports him!

  • RSoxGuy
    March 6, 2015 at 5:44 pm

    Clive has lost his shit once again.

    Hes clearly frustrated at the FACT hes been wrong more time in the past month than he can throw the race card at.

    TURTLE BOY IS ALL OF US! White, red, bloue, green black, grey, brown or yellow. WE ARE TURTLE BOY!

    Our comments and website are gutter trash? Consider this Clive, not once has this website gotten a principal a punch in the face. Not once has this website cried RACISM in order to force schools to keep 18 yr old 10th graders who throw chairs and assault staff members in schools.

    Ask yourself that question Clive. heres the thing, even if you ask yourself that, will you at least be honest with yourself and admit its on you? YOU OWN THIS CLIVE! You have brought all of this on yourself.

  • WCT
    March 6, 2015 at 5:38 pm

    Old Clive article…. How’s Norths no tolerance looking now?

  • Not-A-Hippie
    March 6, 2015 at 5:23 pm

    Dear Turtleboy,

    You left out the douchebag protesters going in to high-end restaurants and staring at people while they eat. Those white people are clearly racist for trying to enjoy a meal in peace!

    Oh, and Clive? Yeah… FUCK YOU and SUCK MY DICK. I know you’re reading this.

    A Turtle Rider

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