Entitled Millennial Dooshnozzle Fired For Whining About Yelp Not Paying Her Enough To Live By Herself In Expensive San Francisco Apartment

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A Yelp customer service employee wrote this open letter to Yelp CEO Jeremy Stoppelman in her blog, and it has gone viral. The woman, known as Talia Jane, is apparently upset that her boss doesn’t pay her enough to keep up with the cost of living in the Bay Area – the most expensive part of the country to live in. After she wrote the blog it was shared thousands of times on social media, and she was quickly fired by Yelp, because that’s how things work in the real world. Her post perfectly describes the delusional mentality of millennials who think the world owes them something, instead of the other way around. Let’s take a look. Her idiotic ramblings are in italics and our rational commentary follows in bold.

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Dear Jeremy,

When I was a kid, back in the 90s when Spice Girls and owning a pager were #goals, I dreamed of having a car and a credit card and my own apartment. I told my 8-year old self, This is what it means to be an adult. Now, seventeen years later, I have those things. But boy did I not anticipate a decade and a half ago that a car and a credit card and an apartment would all be symbols of stress, not success.

First of all, anyone who writes an open letter is by definition a huge buttnut. Oh, you mean life as an adult isn’t exactly how you pictured it when you were 8 years old? Mind blown!!

I left college, having majored in English literature, with a dream to work in media.

Ding, ding, ding!!! We found the problem – you majored in English Lit. Because what employer isn’t looking to hire someone who can compare and contrast their favorite Bronte sisters.  But like, what was the plan after college? Work in media? That’s not a plan. That’s just a vague phrase you threw together. 

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It was either that or go to law school. Or become a teacher.

God forbid you become a teacher. That’s so below you. 

I also desperately needed to leave where I was living — I could get into the details of why, but to sum up: I wanted to die every single day of my life and it took me several years to realize it was because of the environment I was in.

Oh you poor thing. It must’ve been so harsh living in a place that wasn’t as hip as San Francisco. When you graduate from college you’re supposed to get a glamorous job working in the big city. Because you’re entitled to it. 

Coming out of college without much more than freelancing and tutoring under my belt, I felt it was fair that I start out working in the customer support section of Yelp/Eat24 before I’d be qualified to transfer to media.

Well, I’m glad she agrees that this was fair. Because her opinion of what is and isn’t fair matters. 

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Then, after I had moved and got firmly stuck in this apartment with this debt, I was told I’d have to work in support for an entire year before I would be able to move to a different department.

Holy smokes!!! Say it ain’t so Talia Jane!! You had to work in a shitty job for a whole YEAR?? Like, 365 days? At least it wasn’t a leap year!! Or was it?? Madness!!

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A whole year answering calls and talking to customers just for the hope that someday I’d be able to make memes and twitter jokes about food. If you follow me on twitter, which you don’t, you’d know that these are things I already do.

You’re right girl!! Everyone who graduates from college with a degree in English Lit has a right to a job tweeting out memes about food. 

So here I am, 25-years old, balancing all sorts of debt and trying to pave a life for myself that doesn’t involve crying in the bathtub every week.

A 25 year old balancing debt and struggling to make ends meet? In America??? What kind of third world insanity is this??

Every single one of my coworkers is struggling. They’re taking side jobs, they’re living at home.

Side jobs? Living at home? What’s up with all this personal responsibility? That’s crazy talk. When will Talia ever have time to take a dump selfie if she has to get a second job?

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One of them started a GoFundMe because she couldn’t pay her rent. She ended up leaving the company and moving east, somewhere the minimum wage could double as a living wage.

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! She sounds like a winner!!

Another wrote on those neat whiteboards we’ve got on every floor begging for help because he was bound to be homeless in two weeks. Fortunately, someone helped him out.

Oh you poor things. Where will he charge his iPad if he’s homeless? This is bonkers!!

Another guy who got hired, and ultimately let go, was undoubtedly homeless. He brought a big bag with him and stocked up on all those snacks you make sure are on every floor (except on the weekends when the customer support team is working, because we’re what makes Eat24 24-hours, 7 days a week but the team who comes to stock up those snacks in the early hours during my shift are only there Mondays through Fridays, excluding holidays. They get holidays and weekends off! Can you imagine?). By and large, our floor pummels through those snacks the fastest and has to roam other floors to find something to eat. Is it because we’re gluttons? Maybe. If you starve a pack of wolves and toss them a single steak, will they rip each other to shreds fighting over it? Definitely.

Hold on a second. Yelp gives their employees free snacks?? And she’s bitching about her job?? Do you understand what I would’ve done for a job with free snacks?

I haven’t bought groceries since I started this job. Not because I’m lazy, but because I got this ten pound bag of rice before I moved here and my meals at home (including the one I’m having as I write this) consist, by and large, of that. Because I can’t afford to buy groceries. Bread is a luxury to me, even though you’ve got a whole fridge full of it on the 8th floor. But we’re not allowed to take any of that home because it’s for at-work eating. Of which I do a lot.

Here’s the thing Talia, I wanna believe you. I really do. But according to your publicly viewable Twitter, you eat out and cook a lot nicer food then we ever eat in the Turtleboy household all the time:

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And if you can’t afford to buy groceries, then why do you shop at Trader Joes? Don’t they sell groceries there?

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But please, tell me more about how bread is a luxury for you. It seems like you’re really struggling. 

Let’s talk about those benefits, though. They’re great. I’ve got vision, dental, the normal health insurance stuff — and as far as I can tell, I don’t have to pay for any of it! Except the copays. $20 to see a doctor or get an eye exam or see a therapist or get medication. Twenty bucks each is pretty neat, if spending twenty dollars didn’t determine whether or not you could afford to get to work the next week.

Wait a minute, wait a minute. So not only do you get free snacks at work, you also get FULL health insurance? Yelp pays 100% of your health insurance and doesn’t require ANY employee contributions? This is the greatest job I’ve ever heard of. You realize that those teachers that you demeaned earlier on have to fight tooth and nail to pay 25% of their health insurance plans right? Others in the private sector pay significantly more. That can get a little pricey. Oh yea, and the plans they have, just like every other health insurance plan, generally comes with automatic copays of $20. But please, tell me more about how tough you have it at Yelp. It sounds unbearable!!

Speaking of that whole training thing, do you know what the average retention rate of your lowest employees (like myself) are? Because I haven’t been here very long, but it seems like every week the faces change.

You mean to tell me that people working in entry level jobs don’t stay there for very long? That’s crazy talk!! The whole point of entry level positions is to stay there and never advance. LOL. This is the mentality of people who think the minimum wage should be $15 an hour. The thing minimum wags jobs are the end instead of the beginning. I guess it’s not surprising that Talia feels this way. She’s party of this generation that actually thinks socialism is a real thing that works. 

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Tattoos Massachusetts

Will you pay my phone bill for me? I just got a text from T-Mobile telling me my bill is due. I got paid yesterday ($733.24, bi-weekly) but I have to save as much of that as possible to pay my rent ($1245) for my apartment that’s 30 miles away from work because it was the cheapest place I could find that had access to the train, which costs me $5.65 one way to get to work. That’s $11.30 a day, by the way. I make $8.15 an hour after taxes. I also have to pay my gas and electric bill. Last month it was $120. According to the infograph on PG&E’s website, that cost was because I used my heater. I’ve since stopped using my heater. Have you ever slept fully clothed under several blankets just so you don’t get a cold and have to miss work? Have you ever drank a liter of water before going to bed so you could fall asleep without waking up a few hours later with stomach pains because the last time you ate was at work? I woke up today with stomach pains. I made myself a bowl of rice.

So let me get this straight. You purposely chose to live in an apartment, BY YOURSELF, where rent is more than my mortgage. And you did so knowing that you would be working in a minimum wage job. That sounds like a GREAT plan. What could possibly go wrong? And now you have to turn the heat down once in a while and put on a hoodie when it’s cold? In America?? What kind of third world bullshit is that?? 

Hey Talia, here’s an idea. Maybe find a roommate on Craigslist, or move in with one of your coworkers. That will cut your rent in half. Then instead of turning the heat down, stop spending money on vodka, bourbon, and maybe unplug a couple of things in your kitchen:

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Might help. 

Should I sell my car? It’s not my car, actually, it’s my grandpa’s. But the back left tire is flat and the front right headlight is out and the registration is due to be renewed in April and I already know I can’t afford any of that. I haven’t even gotten an oil change since I started this job (in August).

Wait, she doesn’t have a car payment??? She got a free car??? How much free shit does this girl get? Free snacks at work, free healthcare, and a free car. I’d give my right nut for all that free shit. But please, tell me how you can’t afford a $20 oil change when you’re going out for milkshakes and stuffing your face with pringles:

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I suggested that Eat24 offer a matching donation with customers where they can choose a donation amount during checkout and Eat24/Yelp would match it and donate those profits to a national food program.

As an entry level employee, the company values your suggestions. It definitely matters what you think. Definitely. 

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Maybe instead, you can let customers choose a donation amount during checkout and divide those proceeds among your employees….

Oh yea, let’s encourage paying customers to donate to the Talia fund because she wants to live by herself in the most expensive part of the country while being paid minimum wage. 

…..who spend more than 60% of their income on rent? The ideal percent is 30%. As I said, I spend 80%. What do you spend 80% of your income on? I hear your net worth is somewhere between $111 million and $222 million. That’s a whole lotta rice.

See that right there? This mentality is so prevalent amongst the feel the Bern crowd. Newsflash Talia – it doesn’t matter what he makes. He’s earned every penny of it because he started an extremely successful company that provides a service that is in high enough demand to create that sort of revenue. You do a job that any idiot with a GED can do. You have no value and you provide no utility to the company. 

According to this website, you’ve got a pretty nice house in the east bay. Have you ever been stranded inside a CVS because you can’t afford to get to work? How much do you pay your gardeners to keep that lawn and lovely backyard looking so neat?

It’s shocking that she’s a lonely, single cat woman isn’t it? 

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UPDATE: As of 5:43pm PST, I have been officially let go from the company. This was entirely unplanned (but I guess not completely unexpected?) but any help until I find new employment would be extremely appreciated. My PayPal is, my Venmo is taliajane (no hyphen). Square Cash is$TaliaJane. Thank you so much for helping my story be heard.

Jesus H. Christ. This is what this generation of morons thinks you’re supposed to do when you lose your job because you took a public dump on your boss who gave you free health insurance? Beg people to send money to your PayPal? LOL. They really have zero shame. Hey, it’s a lot easier than taking personal responsibility, or budgeting your money better. Now that she doesn’t have a job I guess she’ll just have to leech off the taxpayers with government healthcare instead. 

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For all you millennials out there, let me tell you something that no one has apparently ever told you before – you don’t get trophies for trying your best. You are entitled to nothing. Your English Lit degree is useless. Nothing you learned about in college was real. No job is below you, because you are a nobody and you are worth nothing. Tweeting memes isn’t a real job. 

It doesn’t mean there isn’t a light at the end of the tunnel. This is America and there are a billion different ways to make a living. Turtleboy writes a Goddamn BLOG for crying out loud. This pays our bills because there is a demand for it. People wanted hot takes so we gave it to them. The CEO of Yelp did the same thing – he supplied a demand. Instead of whining about the things that successful people aren’t giving you, perhaps you should figure out a way to make yourself a valuable commodity that is actually worth something. 

Welcome to reality. 


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Tattoos Massachusetts

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20 Comment(s)
  • Fuck Yelp
    February 28, 2016 at 9:41 am

    She sounds like a real douche ,but I say FUCK Yelp too! It’s a stupid company who calls my buisness at least once a week to bribe me to pay $350 so they can “filter” out all my bad reviews ! First off ,anyone can write a review for any company good or bad, even if they have never been there! That’s bullshit ! And not to mention when I decline there “services” I magically get an aweful review for my buisness , and is usually from a person in California ( if you click on their profile, it tells you where they are from) yelp is a fucked up company that can really destroy small buisness owners. Not nice.

  • Maggie the Cat
    February 25, 2016 at 6:42 pm

    It appears today’s kids have no education in history. Let’s take two recent “socialist” systems — the U.S.S.R. (Union of Soviet Socialist Republics) and National Socialism (Nazis). Except for a few people, the lives under those systems were miserable — worse than Talia could ever imagine. Mass killings, not just based on religion, shortages of food and other necessities of life, and constant fear. And did anyone notice that both systems failed? If half or more of my income went to those who were capable of working but did not do so, I’d quit working. That’s what happened in the U.S.S.R. Oh yes, people showed up for work because they were afraid not to, but nobody really did anything. Why should they, when they had no hope for the future?

    Talia is a an example of those who know nothing.

  • Joe Max
    February 24, 2016 at 10:43 pm

    Delusional and entitled. I know S.F. quite well and visit there fairly often. She could get a hotel room in the Tenderloin. If she really wanted to stay in the city. Probably for about a grand a month. Dump, yes, but she is young and can rough it. Something like Madonna did in NYC back so long ago, when she first got there. But no, blame it someone else and get fatter by the second !

  • The guy
    February 24, 2016 at 5:43 pm

    That’s so weird….i didn’t hear anything about her second job. She didn’t even mention it.

  • Fatfinger Lou
    February 24, 2016 at 4:59 pm

    Where is Anonymous when they need to be hacking and draining spurious crowd funding accounts? If money can be put into a GoFundMe, Creditors should be able to hang an immediate debit.

    Call it a GoEffMe.

  • juror seven
    February 24, 2016 at 4:22 pm

    If she wants to write memes the couple she used on her whinny blog aren’t very good

    • Devils Mouthpiece
      February 24, 2016 at 6:32 pm

      Seriously, not shooting very high is she. Write mems about food for a living. Lame. Just lame.

  • Wabbitt
    February 24, 2016 at 12:03 pm

    This makes me want to vote for Trump…

  • JayC
    February 24, 2016 at 11:06 am

    Sadly, I am not the least bit surprised, she’s just one example of the coddle me generation. This gal has youth on her side and rather than get her rear-end out there and get a second job working during the evening or overnight and live cheap by spending on essentials , she takes to the Internet to complain. There are Starbucks on every corner in CA, go work there part-time. How about a 24-hour Walmart or Target for 20-25 hours a week? For the love of God, she has a Cadillac healthcare plan, money from a second job could get her caught up or well ahead.

    Worse, she expects others to chip in their hard working money voluntarily or through socialism for her so called problem of being in an entry level job and not wanting to work extra to make some cash. Welcome to the real world, where you actually have to use your hands and work for money, not put it out and expect just to get Benjamin’s handed to you.

  • ItsAllABadDream
    February 24, 2016 at 11:01 am
  • Millenial here
    February 24, 2016 at 11:01 am

    This is absolutely ridiculous. I want to punch that girl in the face. I’m a millenial. I moved out at 17, I never went to college because I knew a shit degree wouldn’t get me anywhere. I worked endlessly at 2 jobs or more for years, had roommates, and was never in debt. I worked my way up in one of the companies I worked for and bought a house at 22. I did this with hard work. I don’t understand why everyone around my age bitches so much about not being able to afford anything. Save your money, make good decisions, stop being a fucking crybaby. It’s tough, but it’s called being an adult. That job sounds amazing to me, she gets all that at entry level? Disgusting.

  • Adam
    February 24, 2016 at 10:05 am

    I hate my generation with the fire of a thousand suns.

  • Jafreese
    February 24, 2016 at 8:44 am

    This enrages me beyond words because it is so familiar yet so different. I graduated school with a technical degree but also had to take an entry level job answering phones. But instead of whining about it I worked my butt off and learned all I could. Had to work weekends, nights, holidays too. Worked my way up to more technical position with better pay, and it doesn’t stop there. Need to keep working or you’re out the door. Kids like this don’t understand the pride in working your way up. And staying in one position for a year before moving on is pretty standard anywhere cuz companies don’t have time to be constantly moving people around and retraining people.

    Now the living situation. Holy smokes this entitled snot. I’m in my 40’s and have NEVER had my own place. Had roommates in college and after college. Eventually moved in with my gf (now my wife) and we split costs too. And even more close to home, we moved away for a few years and we’re looking to move again. We thought San Fran would be a great place, until we looked at prices, and said no way could we do that, and we came back here.

    This is what I hate most about the Bernie Sanders crowd. He himself might be well intentioned, but he’s giving these people an excuse to not take any personal responsibility. Sure there are shady things in business, politics, etc but by far the person who is most responsible for your situation is you. Doesn’t matter if other people have more money, because if they didn’t have it, it doesn’t mean that money would go to you.

  • ninja turtleboy
    February 24, 2016 at 8:32 am

    This girls got champagne taste with a Budweiser budget. Sounds like she got in a little over her head after mommy and daddy cut her off and she had to start taking care of herself with no concept of money and how to make/spend it. Also, how did that picture of that dirty ass, squalor kitchen surface? like did she take that photo and post it to social media and for what reason? ratchet

    • Devils Mouthpiece
      February 24, 2016 at 6:41 pm

      I’m guessing she’s trying to play the sympathy card with that dirty kitchen.

      I have ZERO sympathy for folks that cry poverty, but as you so eloquently put it, have champagne taste with a Budweiser budget. Probably the type to hit Starbucks 3x a day instead of making it at home due to pure laziness and shitty attitude. “Life is hard so I owe it to myself”. Give yourself a big pat on the back just for getting out of bed another day.

      Epic fail on her and her parents. My guess is, she trips over stacks of trophy’s around her apartment.

  • TDF
    February 24, 2016 at 8:17 am

    Good Bourbon in a Diet Coke….the woman is a savage.

    • mike
      February 24, 2016 at 12:36 pm

      This was my exact thought.

      • Devils Mouthpiece
        February 24, 2016 at 6:31 pm

        Savage is an understatement.

  • biff
    February 24, 2016 at 7:08 am
  • Reddog
    February 24, 2016 at 3:07 am

    Wow.unreal. I also see why she has no roommate by the condition of her kitchen. What a slob.

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