LeBron Is Dead, Shirley Stripper Cop And Wannabe Gangsta Selectman Sugar Daddy, Facebook Just Screwed Itself And We Are Sending Zuckerberg’s Kids To Public School

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Three topics on the agenda today that Uncle Turtleboy is passionate about:

1. The Celtics are going to win the NBA Champioship this year, and LeBron is officially dead in the Eastern Conference.

2. This stripper cop from Shirley and her sugar daddy, wannabe gangsta elderly selectman boy toy, have made this town the most corrupt town in the state.

3. Facebook is fucked. Taking down our pages because our profile picture supported murdered Yarmouth cop Sean Gannon was the final straw. They will be BEGGING us for mercy and we will not rest until Mark Zuckerberg’s kids have to go to public school.

7 Comment(s)
  • The Professor
    The Professor
    May 16, 2018 at 7:42 am

    Try Adblock Plus if you can’t take pop ups. I expect Turtleboy doesn’t want us using it but if the pop ups are killing you so badly try it. I have no problems with the site. Firefox, Tor, and Safari have easily adjustable settings that will fix your issues. You complain that you have to scroll to get to comments. The reason is that the blogs are chock full of content. Jeez.

    • Mary Ann
      May 16, 2018 at 6:16 pm

      It’s not only the ads that are the problem. What sucks is that font is so big it’s unreadable so we don’t get to read the content. We miss out on half the story. And then we went to express our frustration in hopes of it getting fixed. And we have to spend forever trying to do that. It begins to get annoying. I know I look forward to reading this blog, but lately it has become A real pain in the ass.

  • Shawn Silvia
    Pissed off turtle rider
    May 16, 2018 at 5:39 am

    Your website fucking sucks again, can’t click on anything without pop-ups. How hard is it to get this right? One of you brainiacs pick up your phone and try to surf your own site and see how bad it is. I can’t read any of the stories.

    • Jaxson
      May 16, 2018 at 6:43 am

      You couldn’t have said it any better. I use to love this blog. But honestly, I’m so sick of hearing how Facebook did this and Facebook did that. Never mind if you want like a comment you get a pop up, if you want to leave a comment you continue to scroll for 20 minutes, and then there is the huge font that can’t be read. And instead of fixing this so that people can actually be part of Turtleboy, it’s all about Facebook.

    • Dudley DooRight
      May 16, 2018 at 8:09 am

      How else do you want him/her to monetize this blog? Did you send him/her a donation? No? Well what the fuck, are they running a soup kitchen?

    • May 17, 2018 at 12:09 am

      Hey guys, we know people are mad about popups and shit like that. Trust me, we’d definitely do away with those if we could. You may notice we have a donation button you can give to. Have you done that yet? Or is this free website not good enough for you? Is there anything else we can get you free of charge to make your life slightly more convenient? We get paid per impression on blogs. Without Facebook traffic plummets. The rates advertisers pay us has dipped by 75% because we’ve been blacklisted by Google Adsense. So basically we’re making 10% of what we made at this point last year. Once again, we’d love to have no ads, which is why we have a donation button. But when people don’t donate, this is the free website you get. Don’t like it? Vote for Bernie.

      • Jaxson
        May 17, 2018 at 5:43 am

        Donated three times already to your free website and I can hardly ever read it. Show some respect to your followers for real instead of assuming shit. And ya this may be a free websites but you could fixed if you spent some time on it

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