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Romance is hard. You’ve got to put yourself out there, weed through a bunch of potential suitors until you find “the one”…there’s rejection to be faced, and money to be spent on nights out, and always the potential for heartbreak.
Or you could just fast track the whole damn thing and blanket Facebook with requests for some clamhole, with the promise of eight crisp Hamilton’s and some xans and ganja in return. That’s what Joe Carreira of Plymouth did, and it’s yielding some pretty fucking creepy/hilarious results.
He of course, got called out, and what then transpired is the Plymouth hoodbooger #metoo movement.
Who the hell asks for “butt”? Smooth operator, right here, I tell you. You’ve got to be a special kind of scumcunt to go cold calling for tricks over social media. He blanketed that shit like he was running a Goddamn campaign.
Turns out this Benzobitch has been wisely attempting to peddle his prescriptions all over Facebook for a while now, and not just for a quick sloppy ride on the chlamydia express. Clearly a shrewd businessman. This guy’s Facebook is literally the whiniest, most pathetic steaming garbage pile of a trainwreck I have ever seen:
I’m with her, broseph. Cut the shit, you’re not single by choice. You’re single because you treat every female you encounter like it’s The Red Light District. Nobody wants to hang out with a whiny queef who solicits every broad he sees for a drugged out quickie in exchange for a few ten dollar bills and your Masshealth funded prescription pills. I mean, seriously. Look at this freaking Pervinator Deluxe:
This guy is just relentless.
This is why they never should have shut down Backpage, God damnit. Where are all those strong, independent, make-my-own-dollars, junked out crack hoes supposed to go now? Joey needs them, for fuck’s sake, and they need Joey!! Honestly, who cares if some cracked out Xanny Hobgoblin like this:
Wants to find a nice young lady who will slob his knob for a third of his dishwashing check and a night blacked out on benzos? That to me is a scumjunk transaction that has it’s place in the free market, and keeps unassuming women on social media a little bit safer from Pervantor propositions like this:
He just wants “one last hurrah” with some herpes cupcake in exchange for drugs and cash, before he “goes to rehab”, which he has been threatening to do for damn near a month. Come on, dude, you’re not doing anything to better your life – get real. You’re just getting off on whining and bitching like a preteen girl.
Don’t call him out on his bullshit, or tell him there is 100% a way for him to just shut the fuck up and check himself in here, because that’s negative, dawg:
Somebody get this Xanny goblin a tissue for his tears and a tampon for his pussy. We need a wambulance, stat!!
Anyway, per usual, I like to wrestle a moral out of every pile of junk I write about, and this one is pretty clear. First of all, don’t solicit every female within a 10 mile radius for sex in exchange for benzos and cash, we generally don’t like that. Don’t be a Benzo addled Pervantor and then cry about having no friends – that’s why you have no friends, you junk-fiend fool. Nobody wants to hang around a self centered crysack. Get the fuck over yourself, nobody’s winning like this, least of all you, Benzobitch.
Furthermore, if you feel you need treatment so badly that you are regularly announcing it to the internet, just fucking shut up and do it, dude. Joe, if you’re reading this – I first want to commend you for not having children, for you, sir, are a steaming pile of hot mess. I would counter that with the assumption that if you’re offering up all your worldly prized posses ion in exchange for some gland to gland combat, it’s probably not all your doing. Thank God there are no lives currently dependent on you, either way. That is a positive. But seriously, you are fucking annoying. Just shut the fuck up, check yourself into High Point or something – that is the junkbox OkCupid, alright? You will meet a lady in there who is so broken, desperate and low on her self esteem that she will take a look at this mug:
Be charmed by your relentless desperation, and offer up free access to the stench trench because her daddy just never loved her enough, and she’s done way more for way less at this point anyway.
And while you’re away, nobody will be inundated with skin crawling messages like this sliding in the DMs….
So it’s a win-win for everybody!!
9 Comment(s)
This dude literally messaged me the outline of his dick in his boxers yesterday and when I shared it on my fb found out he sent exact same pics to other girls as well
or . . . he could just stand on railroad tracks and kiss the engine as it comes by, that would work faster than rehab
The best rehab for this queef is several grains of high velocity lead between the eyes.
WTF…are those womens glasses?
They are the snap chat glasses that came out last year or the year before. The little circle things on the upper edges are cameras. They were released in some pop up vending machines only around the us for a short time each pop up.
There are some people who are just destined to become fertilizer. This is one. He’s one missed Narcan injection away from making the world a better place.
He just needs to take a bath with his toaster and do us all a favor.
Dude you can get a free ride into detox, then a css and half way haha he just CHOOSES not too. There them CHOICES go again. They had ONE state funded bed when I did it in ’12. I can BET there are many more now so nice try Joey C. And what is up with this new little cocktail they are getting now, Subs Addies and XANIES? For real? You either get sober on subs alone or nothing. Half assery in the recovery.
I’ve a cousin who’s been on subutext for YEARS. Its just a legal way to get high, the same as the meth tweekers getting scripts for adderall. MDs…the real junky-makers.