Turtleboy Investigates

Dildo Stain Is Calling The Cops And His Lawyer On Anyone Who Questions His Extremely Questionable Claims About Invading Iraq In 2003



This is Benjamin Allbright.


And he is the worst person in the universe.

According to his Twitter bio he’s a talk show host, reporter, and analyst for Denver sports talk radio. He also mentions the fact that he’s a veteran, something he uses as a trump card to win the thousands of weekly pissing matches he gets into with random Twitter eggs of no particular significance.

Last week when Dave Portnoy tweeted out a joke about crushing unions that everyone freaked out about, Benny boy inserted himself into the story by offering up this.

Kirk Minihane and his loyal Twitter army started giving the guy shit, and he couldn’t possibly have been a bigger queef in his responses.

These are just random people, and he replies to almost every one of them who has anything negative to say about him, despite the fact that he 83,000 followers, and probably gets thousands of replies a day.

Note the douchiness and arrogance.

“Imagine not knowing what I do and pretending it’s entry level.”

He’s important. VERY important. Imagine not being important as him while pretending you are as important as him? Sucks to be you.

He also claims that he got nearly a perfect LSAT score, but turned down law school for bigger and better things, which he’s mentioned dozens of times, and at one point had in his bio.

What a winner!

He’s contradicted himself more times than I can count on several topics. For instance, he claims that he left Harvard Law School to do what he does now – talk about the Broncos, pretend to be important, and get the last word in with random people on social media all day.

But yet he also said he was in Iraq when he found out he was accepted to Harvard Law, but never ended up going there.

In another reply to a random person on Twitter he said that many of his fellow classmates at Harvard Law walked around with their ass hanging out of their pants and an EBT card.

At this point he’s established himself as an inconsistent story teller at best, and an outright liar who can’t keep his lies straight at worst.

When someone pointed this out to him he then changed his story back:

“Planned to go and then withdrew.”

No, you didn’t say you planned to go. You said you LEFT Harvard Law, which insinuates that you attended Harvard Law. You also made comments about the way your alleged classmates dressed at Harvard Law, which would be hard to do if you never attended Harvard Law.  And how exactly do you withdraw from an institution that you only “planned” on going to?

The reason I bring this guy up is because he’s trying to get Kirk Minihane and producer Steve Robinson fired from Barstool, and it’s complete bullshit. Based on Davey Mouse Portnoy’s recent gutless actions in selling out his employees, I have reason to believe he’s likely to give into the mob too.

Basically they suspect he’s not telling the whole truth about not only the Harvard thing, but about several aspects of his military service. Here’s what Allbright said in an email to Robinson about his inconsistencies.

Have I been bad at verbiage on the Harvard claim in an effort to make myself look better, eh probably. Approached differently, you had a point there. I stretched the facts and it made it look like something it wasn’t. I’ll own that. It looks bad. Wasnt my intent to lie, but I was definitely being a jackass.

So he readily admits he was lying to make himself look better. Duly noted.

He has a lot of other things he claimed as well, including:

  • He was a walk on football player at the University of Arkansas, where he graduated with three bachelor’s degrees in History, Statistics, and English Literature
  • His father golfed on the PGA tour for three years
  • He was golden gloves in the army

  • He has served in combat tours in Iraq and Afghanistan, as well as being stationed overseas in Korea and Germany. Yet he never mentions Afghanistan when he talks about his deployments overseas.

  • He served as a Second Warrant Officer in the army, a decorated position for “intermediate level experts of both the technical and tactical aspects of leading in their field,” which many have questioned.

  • He was part of the “spear” in Iraq in 2003, in initial invasion force to remove Sadaam Hussein

  • He headed off to be deployed to Iraq in 2003 just 30 minutes after his father’sfuneral, leaving his family in tears

  • He helped build a wall between Iraq and Iran, which he used to win a pissing match with someone in an argument over whether or not we should build a wall with Mexico, while also claiming to have worked on the Syrian border.

I had no idea there was even a wall in between Iraq an Iran, nor can I find anything about said wall on the interwebz.

Normally I wouldn’t question someone like this, but the problem is that he makes his service a major part of his brand and identity.

It deserves to be looked into.

To win an argument about Josh Gordon passing a piss test he sited his work on the “urinalysis team” in the military.

Urinalysis team? Sure thing Ace.

He’s mentioned the fact that he’s “highly decorated” in order to own every random person who questions his greatness on Twitter.

I’ve never heard a highly decorated soldier repeatedly refer to themselves as highly decorated before. Just sayin.

Ironically he also frequently accuses other people of stolen valor and wants them investigated.


  • At one point he claimed that he’s retired after selling his consulting firm. He also said he was going to send someone to jail for stolen valor after he got their IP information from Twitter.

The arrogance of this douchebag to so confidently state that Twitter is just going to give up IP information on random people because he wants to know everything about them is off the charts. And the fact that a 39 year old could make so much money off the sale of his alleged consulting firm, that he could retire and take a job talking about sports to pass the time, seems suspect as well. Especially since there’s no mention of this highly successful consulting firm on his LinkedIn.

  • In order to prove that his opinion is more enlightened than other people’s he frequently sites his three tours, but yet other times says he did two tours, and said that voting for Trump is like spitting in the face of vets like him.

His explanation for that was that two of those tours were “full,” while the third was a “mini tour for a consult.”

Silly civilians and their questions!!

  • He claims someone spit in his face after returning from Iraq

I’m sure that DEFINITELY happened. Definitely. Absolutely NO WAY someone would make that up. Ever.

Basically guy’s whole shtick is as follows:

  • He’s the greatest at everything he does
  • People who challenge him are all very dumb, not even close to his level, and get blocked for being ignorant
  • Because of his life experiences his opinions on everything carry more weight
  • He’s a whistle blower who stands up to injustice when he sees it

He’s Cocky Kevin Cullen.

In 2008 he did a long interview with Justine Sharrock from Mother Jones, in which he claims that he worked with Iraqi prisoners of war and was aghast at the treatment they received. Mother Jones is a far left wing media outlet, so the spin on it was that this brave soldier in an institution that is overwhelmingly conservative, had the courage to come forward and call out injustices he witnessed against enemy combatants.

In Iraq, Ben was assigned to the 82nd Airborne Division; since there was no computer work for him to do, he was made a prison guard,” she wrote. “The first time Ben saw a detainee get beaten, he took the lead interrogator aside afterward to ask, ‘Was this stuff really allowed? Didn’t it violate the Geneva Conventions?’”

This uncritical, single sourced, non-verified retelling of one man’s story made him a legend in the human rights activist community. He is always the passive-aggressive hero. Always.

However, in emails that were forwarded to us from the US Army, they said they had no records of him serving in Iraq in 2003 or 2004 or 2007, but they did have him there in 2009.

“Sergeant Allbright served as a signal support systems specialist in the Army Reserve from April 1998 to March 2012,” Army Public Affairs Officer William J. Sharp said in an email.

“He deployed to Kuwait and Iraq from August 2009 to February 2010,” he said.

But according to Ben’s public statements he was an interrogator, a combat engineer, and an information technology specialist. The army also said they have no knowledge of him serving in Afghanistan.

Could the Army records be lost or wrong? Maybe. Ben can easily clear this up himself, but he has a tendency to block anyone who questions him.

The story itself also shows more inconsistencies with some of the things he’s said. He claimed earlier that he was in Iraq when he found out he was accepted into Harvard (and declined of course), but in the Mother Jones article he told them he turned down an offer from NYU for law school, and made no mention of Harvard.

Which is probably what someone would do if they had a habit of making shit up as they went along.

He also repeated the line about being deployed 30 minutes after his father died in 2003. Every person we’ve asked about this said the army would never tear you away from your family 30 minutes after a funeral. But maybe Ben’s just special like that.

There’s also no record of him playing football at Arkansas, no record of him being “golden gloves” (whatever that means) in the army, nor is there any trace of his father golfing on the PGA tour.

At this point it was more than fair for anyone associated with Barstool Sports, or the military in general, to question his claims. After all, this is a guy who aggressively has gone after people he suspects of stolen valor, and virtue signals about how the Barstool crowd is beneath him.

Apparently Steve Robinson began to email him with some questions and Benny boy didn’t like that, so he posted a screenshot of a portion of the email on Twitter in an attempt to portray himself as a veteran being falsely accused of stolen valor.

Nowhere in there does Steve say he’s going to write a hit piece on him calling him a liar about serving in Iraq in 2003. He just asked for confirmation, which is more than fair considering how often this guy uses his military service in order to prove that he’s more enlightened on political topics.

He also immediately deflects to the “My family is being harassed” bullshit that people do in order to deflect when they’re exposed. He claims that Steve isn’t allowed to write about him, even though he has no control of that whatsoever, and as a defender of Kaepernick he should know how free speech works. (Shocking that the guy with the questionable background doesn’t want people writing about him.) And my favorite, if you like a tweet that’s negative towards him in this matter you will be getting blocked.

Does he have proof that his family was harassed by Minihane fans? No, but he does have a business card showing he filed a police report.

Of course anyone can file a police report for anything. In no way, shape, or form does this prove that his family has been getting harassed. Yet he claims someone called him up using a voice changer, and told him that “you don’t fuck with Barstool.”

He also claims that he himself is getting harassed.

“They called my show.”

You host a call-in show. That’s what people do to call-in shows dumbass. What he’s whining about is that the Minifans have been prank calling him, and there’s no time for joking around on his very, VERY serious Broncos sports talk radio show.

But he got exactly what he wanted out of it – pity.

Then he claimed that his mother texted him about the whole situation in an attempt to get more pity.

I’m sure that’s definitely his mother who sent that. Definitely.

Of course Mom had to call Steve a “lazy s*** head,” too, because she’s a fighter, just like her son.

Benny boy is calling any questioning of his very inconsistent story telling “libel,” like when he messaged MHB on Twitter, and said he was being falsely smeared.

But again, all people are doing is asking legitimate questions. If he didn’t hide behind his service to win every argument he get in then no one would care about his alleged service.

The thing about Benjamin Allbright is, he always wins. And even though he pretended to not like all the attention he’s recently gotten, he also bragged about how his “ad rate” was up as a result of all the Barstool blowback.

Except you don’t make money from Twitter based on your interactions. That’s not how this works.

Ben has been on a mission to get Steve and/or Kirk fired for the last 24 hours.

He claims that he’s gotten lawyers involved because he’s been “falsely accused of committing a crime.”

Except Steve never accused him of that. He just asked for evidence to back up his claims.

Ben says he’s going to be getting his DD 214 forms, proving that he was in fact in Iraq in 2003.

It’s been 24 hours and he hasn’t posted them though, so I posed the question on Facebook about how quickly veterans would be able to produce this. The responses were overwhelming.

Pretty quickly.

So why doesn’t he have his yet?

He moves a lot. Sure thing boss.

Then last night he tweeted out what he clearly thought was proof that he wasn’t lying about being in Iraq in 2003.


As you can see, he was on active duty during that time. But it doesn’t prove he was in Iraq.

The DD 214 could prove that though, so why isn’t he sharing those?

Because he’s not going to do so until Barstool, a company he shit on publicly, fires two employees who questioned his extremely shady past.

The bottom line is that even if Benny boy did serve as he says he did, it doesn’t change the fact that he’s lied about a lot of shit, and he’s fair game for questioning. If Steve and/or Kirk lose their job over this it will be the most gutless capitulation to a mob in history. All they did was ask a question privately, via email, to a guy who was shitting on their company. Here’s the entire email exchange between Benny boy and Steve Robinson. As you will see, Benny boy couldn’t possibly be a bigger dick if he tried.

Sounds perfectly reasonable so far. He of course responded by threatening deformation lawsuits, claiming that it serves no public interest to ask about his alleged service (it does), and warning him to abandon the story because “it’s not going to end up positively for you.”

Steve continued to ask questions.

Benny boy whined some more.

But yet he still promised he’d provide the documents proving his service.

Then finally in the mid afternoon Benny Boy warned him that he’d made a serious mistake, demanded a heartfelt apology, and threatened financial repercussions if he didn’t.

I anxiously await Benny boy clearing this up for us by providing his DD 214’s as he promised. Maybe then he can show us his highlight films playing football for Arkansas, or maybe explain how to build a wall like the one he did on the Iran border.



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71 Comment(s)
  • Pete Ward
    July 15, 2020 at 7:14 am

    It’s not 1990 any more. He can hop on va.gov and download his DD214. I just retired and did it a few weeks ago.

  • Bertha Von Nation
    August 22, 2019 at 3:16 pm

    Wait a second…I married my 82nd paratrooper boyfriend as soon as he got home from the war, AFTER it ended in 1991. It was over by 93. No bullets flying at that guy in 93!

  • Gearjammin' in the sandbox
    August 22, 2019 at 1:30 am

    I was in Iraq starting in March of 2003.
    Rode a petroleum bomb that everyone wanted to detonate so they could upload an Aloha Snackbar video to Al Jizzeria.(Yeah, I know it’s spelled wrong)
    Not a big deal, just the job we had to do. In our case, most of the job was outside the wire.
    This guy was basically an IT specialist with an Army uniform on.
    A lot of us took or exchanged fire and never got the CAB but this Fobbit REMF prick sorts out coax and hooks up CNN for some cunt Colonels that hid in the A/C and he gets one?
    Fuck him, the lying fuck. His mere existence is a sin. He should go exchange DNA with that traitorous bitch, Seth Moulton.

    To all those who put it all on the line everyday they were over there, Welcome Home.

  • Bar Stool buying TBS?
    August 20, 2019 at 10:45 pm

    Is TB begging Bar Stool to buy out his site?

    Sure are a lot of them pro Bar Stool stories and I got no money stories.

  • Wwy
    August 20, 2019 at 5:19 pm

    There’s no valor or respect for any idiot who fought in Iraq a country with a C.I.A dictator Sadaam. That was for Israel and they only need ovens donated. War criminals like chesna know this.

    • Disgusting
      August 20, 2019 at 5:32 pm

      Karma is a bitch
      You’re a sick fuck

    • Wwy
      August 21, 2019 at 12:44 am

      Karma is a Hindu thing like yoga I think you just need a Kleenex when people tell you the truth stop crying like a liberal Jew bitch.

      • Truth Hurts
        August 21, 2019 at 8:48 pm

        I bet in person you would cower if I ever walked up to you. You are a sick fuck on a keyboard but in reality you’re a coward

  • TurtleBoy is CointelPro
    August 20, 2019 at 1:22 pm

    Turtleboysports is Mining IP and Email Addresses, I Regularly use a VPN to protect myself from Abusive website Admins getting ahold of my IP Address, All of my comments on Turtleboy website have been deleted from different posts, because they were sent from VPN ip addresses with different locations, Which means that turtleboy has put up a list of VPN IP addresses and deletes comments from anyone using a VPN. To Force people to unmask there IP Address. This Tactic is Very-Very Shady! I No Longer Trust This Site Or its Website Admins. Also analytic script from facebook is being used on this site to forward all of your info to facebook under the guise of the facebook button on the page, shady. My Guess is There Selling Your Info. I am certain this post will be deleted, please take a screenshot and share.

    • John F Kennedy
      August 20, 2019 at 1:29 pm

      I have an idea, why don’t you change your vpn servers. You are just a butthurt liberal. There is no cointelpro going on. Why don’t you fix your operational security before you go on a conspiracy rant that involves an opp 50 years old you fucking scumbag.

    • TheCureForHope
      August 20, 2019 at 2:07 pm

      Oh my goodness! Her it is 2:07pm and your post is still up! That’s what, like 47 minutes? Turtleboy better get his act together before more TurtleRiders discover the conspiracy!

      Thank you for alerting us to it.

    • Al Anon
      August 20, 2019 at 2:31 pm

      Dude. I never use a real email address, and this site doesn’t give a fuck.

      • Curly Howard
        August 21, 2019 at 1:20 pm

        Basically TB comes off as an outsider that gets pushed off social media. But then is having info on this page forwarded to the same social media companies. Thru Browser script, Data Mining for a $, I get what the guy who wrote the original post was getting at. Cointelpro might be a stretch. But just because you didnt use your real email address doesn’t mean you have anonymity from Big Brother Facebook/Twatter

    • TortugaNiño
      August 20, 2019 at 6:01 pm

      And we are supposed to believe that you’re this knowledgable in computer mumbo jumbo but are also stupid enough to mix up you’re there/their/they’re? Off you fuck, turtle riders arent fooled by your fuckery.

  • Ryan Kobus
    August 20, 2019 at 1:13 pm

    So happy to be free. Thank god I live in Mass lolz!!

  • Just saying
    August 20, 2019 at 12:59 pm

    There is a website that sells phony military documents online. Anyone can get them and put anything on them. I should contact Don Shipley on this but he’s busy busting phony Navy Seals because it’s trendy to be a fake one these days

  • Judge dread
    August 20, 2019 at 12:57 pm

    I know about a dozen and a half combat vets that were in the army or marines over the past 15-19 years or so. Not a single one of them brags about it. This guy probably worked in logistics or as a cook. Or he’s straight up stolen valor.

    • Feck
      August 20, 2019 at 4:56 pm


  • Greg Boyington
    August 20, 2019 at 12:09 pm

    Typical Army. This guy is a pussy.

    I shot down more Japs than any American in history, and the best part is I was shitfaced pretty much the entire time. The worst part about POW camp was no booze.

  • Ten-hut!
    August 20, 2019 at 11:58 am

    Most soldiers are guys who couldn’t get into community college.

  • TL;DR
    August 20, 2019 at 11:30 am

    Whats going on around here, bad links, 404 pages.

    What a Mickey Mouse operation.

    Get your shit together.

  • I see Dumb people
    August 20, 2019 at 10:04 am

    Ok so i am in no way a military service person and i do not know much about the rankings and differant branches of our military and such however, isnt the Army reserves ( the one official document that was posted said he was Army reserves) like the 2 weekends a month or 1 week a year service branch and then there are the regular Army and marines and airforce branches and isnt the Army reserves more of like the wanna be army vets that rarely get called i to combat??? I am being serious with these questions as i am just a regular civilian although i do have family that were front line infantry in the marines tgat actually did thier tours and came home with quite the case of ptsd from all the carnage thry had to witness over there…. This guy really just spumds like an incompetent duck the more he talks .. If you cant keep your lies straight your probably better off not lying and bringung unwanted attention to yourself… Just sayin

    • z
      August 20, 2019 at 2:30 pm

      About 8-9% of the troops in Iraq were National Guard or reserves. 20-25% in Afghanistan up to 2007 + 2008.

  • Massholio
    August 20, 2019 at 9:31 am

    I knew a guy who was filmed in the documentary “Vietnam”. He was boarding a C-41 (DC 3) with his name tag clearly visible. The guy was captured by the VC during the attack on Ton Sun Nut airfield after he was shot in the lag (he was a radio geek). He escaped by chopping a VC’s head off.
    The day after the documentary aired everyone he came across said, “Hey Al! I didn’t know you were in Vietnam! Why didn’t you ever tell anyone?”

  • Dirty Harry
    August 20, 2019 at 9:25 am

    He’s a legend in his own mind.

  • Liawatha
    August 20, 2019 at 8:58 am

    I believe everything Benjamin has communicated to be 100% factual. What I detest is someone who embellishes their past to further their career.
    # Believe All Liberals.

  • Dees nutz
    August 20, 2019 at 8:26 am

    Another point and fact. I work at the Harvard Law School campus 1 day a week. Never are the students underdressed and 99% are in Taylored suits. Not one student would be caught in baggy pants. Not once have I seen an EBT card come out in the Lunch Room. So now we know that he has probably never even stepped foot on campus. And if he was looking at prestigious law schools we know he would have at least toured the campus.

  • 1998
    August 20, 2019 at 7:57 am

    You make some valid points here but the bigger question is why do you continue to carry Kirk’s water? Kirk is about Kirk first and foremost and he keeps you at arms length at best. Let him fight his own battles. If we’re being honest, Kirk’s new podcast leaves a lot to be desired, content wise it’s been weak and personality wise he needs a more of an intellectual equal as a cohost/partner. Let him sort out this mess, maybe he’s onto something with this guy Albright and maybe he’s not, but you’d be better off letting him defend the position on his own. Besides, I didn’t think you were a huge fan of Barstool in the first place but since Kirk joined you’ve been pretty eager to jump to their defense. I think you’d be better off sticking to your own content instead of being Kirk’s pro bono promoter – because when the tides change and you need him in your corner, there’s no guarantee he’ll be there for you…

  • CeCe Telfer
    August 20, 2019 at 7:47 am

    Ben is making my vagina hard

  • Real Combat Infantry
    August 20, 2019 at 6:39 am

    This man is a piece of shit. No DD214 is needed. He claims he served and maybe he did. He was a “signal specialist” or some other rear echelon fuck. Stolen valor? Of course! It is clear on the very first picture of this article. Douchebag is wearing a CIB! He is not infantry! He is a communications guy. He was assigned as a communications guy, not a infantryman. Even if he was 11 Bravo he was assigned as a communications specialist, henceforth does not qualify for the CIB.
    If stolen valor here produces his DD214, (which he won’t, because he is lying) Notice he never ever states where he went to basic training. (Ben, you may want to doctor up your wussie DD214 after reading this.)He should have done basic training at Ft. Benning GA. Ft. Benning is the only basic training AIT (OSUT) that produces infantry. You either went to sand hill or harmony church barracks. This is probably news to Stolen Valor Ben, since he has probably never been there. What 82nd regiment were you attached to? 325th, 504? 505? Who was the commander? Stolen valor? This man is a walking stolen valor. Shitbag probably doesn’t know which way the bullets come out.

    Fuck you Ben! You are a megalomaniac piece of shit! Come clean and stop disrespecting the men that wear the CIB like myself. The jig is up. Come clean and go back to whatever hole you came from. You put up your fake DD214 I will put up my real one.

    • Derp
      August 20, 2019 at 7:10 am

      On Twitter he claims he’s going to release his dd214 and sworn affidavits from people in the know, lol. Photoshop and lying buddies.

    • Feck
      August 20, 2019 at 7:12 am

      Post this on his twitter.

      • BabyBen
        August 20, 2019 at 10:15 am

        Lol i posted sum of that on his twitter and he blocked me! no surprise

    • TheCureForHope
      August 20, 2019 at 1:21 pm

      Thank you for your service.

    • juror seven esq.
      August 20, 2019 at 2:53 pm

      After looking at the picture, I don’t think it is a CIB. The wreath extends the full length of the device. On the CIB that is not the case. I did a Google search on badges of the US Army in an attempt to identify what it could otherwise be.
      The Army now authorizes something called Combat Action Badges. The Combat Action Badge (CAB) is a United States military award. On 2 May 2005, the CSA approved the creation of the CAB to provide special recognition to Soldiers who personally engaged, or are engaged by, the enemy. The CAB is intended to serve as a companion to the CIB and CMB to recognize the greatly expanded role of non-infantry Soldiers in active, ground combat.

      • juror seven esq.
        August 20, 2019 at 3:01 pm

        Wow I posted this less than 5 minutes ago and there are already it has been rated 18 times! 9 up and 9 down. Something seems out of place?

    • Finn
      August 21, 2019 at 11:48 am

      Thank you for your service. I hope this dirt-bag gets his 15 minutes of infamy.

  • Frank Rizzo
    August 20, 2019 at 6:38 am

    No matter what, this guy’s a cunt with a very punchable face, and most likely a cock smoker too, just look at the twitter pic with the sunglasses!

  • Kevin Cullen
    August 20, 2019 at 6:15 am

    Guy seems legit.

    • Mike Barnicle
      August 20, 2019 at 6:17 am

      I think you’re right Kevin.

    • Brian Williams
      August 20, 2019 at 6:19 pm

      Gentlemen, I concur

      • Hillary Clinton
        August 20, 2019 at 7:19 pm

        I would, as well, but Im taking too much sniper fire.

    • Geraldo Rivera
      August 21, 2019 at 8:43 am

      Once I blast open this safe full of DD 214s you’ll see he’s telling the truth!

  • I speak english
    August 20, 2019 at 5:19 am

    All the broken links in the article make you look really professional! I can see you were very excited in writing this article as things are posted twice in a row. Diarrhea of the mouth needs proof reading!

    I enjoy your site turtleboy. Just pointing this out!

    • TheCureForHope
      August 20, 2019 at 6:53 pm

      Dear Speak English….you may speak English, but you obviously don’t read all of the blogs, prick. But go ahead and post your macho criticisms because you can….

      TB did post early today, but you must have missed it, that they were in the process of changing servers (or something?) today so please be patient with links etc.

      Have a lovely evening.

  • Leroy Jenkmem
    August 20, 2019 at 5:19 am

    Mad props to this dude for building that wall in Afghanistan or Pakistan or where ever. For a moment it seemed he might be over stating things but nahhh this dude is the real deal. He went to college and works for a radio station a man of many skills. What was his job in the Army, wall building super man, football dude, like I said mad props mad props.

    August 20, 2019 at 12:01 am

    I think that was THE longest “I COULDN’T GIVE A SHIT LESS” blog that I’ve ever read. Holy shit…..I fell asleep twice reading it.

  • Not Possible
    August 19, 2019 at 11:08 pm

    So if I understand Ben correctly from his Tweets and interviews with Liberal shit media he’s don a lot
    He’s been deployed repeatedly and has done work on a border wall on the Iran and Iraq border as well as the Afghanistan and Pakistan border
    He was assigned to a prison that detained suspected terrorists and sat in on interrogations and then questioned the interrogator
    He was a private contractor after his deployments and had a mini deployment to advise about some sort of equipment
    He had a college degree but never became an officer in the military but did take the LSAT which he topped and then either left law school or decided against going
    He was a NFL scout and also had a successful business that he sold making enough money to retire

    I know I’m probably missing something he did but that’s a pretty impressive run that Ben alleges

  • Back In Nam
    August 19, 2019 at 10:50 pm

    I parachuted into Afghanistan from the space shuttle without a parachute the day after 9-11. Using hand to hand commando fighting techniques I killed 20 Taliban Generals and captured 10 divisions of their soldiers. President Bush thought this looked like bullying and ordered 9 divisions released. No biggie that night I went back out and killed all 9 divisions with a rusty sword.

    In Iraq and Syria I did 37 combats tours was wounded 1,105 times and received 10 medals of honor but that’s all secret. I learned to hold my breath and dive one mile deep for one hour to sabotage a Chinese nuclear submarine smuggling parts to Iran. During my military leave time off I played Major League Baseball for 3 teams and 2 NFL teams. I donated my pay checks to cure kids with cancer and designed the I-phone 12 before the 7 ever came out. You pathetic weaklings just don’t know how to apply yourselves.

    • z
      August 19, 2019 at 11:33 pm

      Ok, that story was believable until you said you could swim 1 mile down and hold your breath for an hour. I don’t think that’s possible.

      I’m now wondering if I should believe everything else.

    • Kevin Cullen
      August 20, 2019 at 6:06 am

      Thank you for your service.

    • Nee Chi
      August 20, 2019 at 12:35 pm

      ^^^I’m Dying!!

      Thank you to all those contributing to this very meaningful dialogue!


    • Kiss Me, I'm Sh!tfaced
      August 20, 2019 at 2:02 pm

      I play in a band, we’re the best in the land
      We’re big in both Chelsea and France
      I play one mean guitar and then score at the bar
      There’s a line of chicks waiting for their chance
      So come on now honey, I’ll make you feel pretty
      These other gals mean nothing to me
      Let’s finish these drinks and be gone for the night
      ‘Cause I’m more than a handful, you’ll see
      So kiss me, I’m shitfaced
      I’m soaked, I’m soiled and brown
      in the trousers, she kissed me
      And I only bought her one round
      I can bench press a car, I’m an ex football star
      with degrees from both Harvard and Yale
      Girls just can’t keep up, I’m a real love machine
      I’ve had far better sex while in jail
      I’ve designed the Sears Tower, I make two grand an hour
      I cook the world’s best duck flambe
      I’ll take the pick of the litter, girls jockey for me
      I don’t need these lines to get laid
      So kiss me, I’m shitfaced
      I’m soaked, I’m soiled and brown
      in the trousers, she kissed me
      And I only bought her one round
      I’m a man of the night, a real ladies delight
      See my figure was chiseled from stone
      One more for the gal then I’ll escort her home
      Come last call, I’m never alone
      I’ve a house on the hill with a red water bed
      That puts Hugh Heffnor’s mansion to shame
      With girls by the pool and Italian sports cars
      I’m just here in this dump for the game

      Ahh, fuck it. Who am I shitting?

      I’m a pitiful sight, and I ain’t all that bright
      I’m definitely not chiseled from stone
      I’m a cheat and a liar, no woman’s desire
      I’ll probably die cold and alone

      But just give me a chance, ’cause deep down inside
      I swear I got a big heart of gold
      I’m a monogamous man, no more one night stands
      Come on, honey, let me take you home

    • Mike Barnicle
      August 20, 2019 at 8:56 pm

      10 Congressional Medals of Honor. That’s terrific!

  • Ben’s Mommy
    August 19, 2019 at 10:35 pm

    I don’t care if this is the guy the blasted Bin Laden this guy is a major douchebag
    He has more bullshit stories and it’s obvious he’s lying
    He’s a one upper and has to use his time in the Army as his ace card

  • Panda
    August 19, 2019 at 10:16 pm

    Freedom of information act can pull his DD214 which I’m positive will show he had a SINGLE MOS and at best was a Fobbit. Douche nozzles like this who play the vet card every god damn day are the worst. You’re not the only one who went over shit bird and since you weren’t SF or CAG and you god damn know you weren’t with the 82nd (I was, 1st/504th) just stop it man. Do us all a favor and suck start a 12 gauge you make all actual combat veterans look like fucking idiots

  • Said Everyone
    August 19, 2019 at 10:01 pm

    It appears Benny is a huge pathological liar and a liberal
    These are signs of two things
    1. Mental Illness
    2.A Tiny Dick

  • Hugh Mungous
    August 19, 2019 at 9:51 pm

    The more he talks about his valor he exposes himself for the fraud that he is, Rat fucks like this should be drawn and quartered. I guarantee this cocksucker never Left Kuwait in Two thousand nine when it was basically a rest haven for combat veterans from Iraq and Afghanistan. Arifjan, Ali Al Saleem? What a complete douche bag,

  • Klancy
    August 19, 2019 at 9:39 pm

    Do NOT rely on a DD214 sent to you by someone in question. Stolen valor has received many doctored documents, some very realistic.
    If you can’t obtain one from the government itself, turn this over to Stolen Valor. Their resources are invaluable.
    It IS a crime to claim service you did not earn. It is not something you can get away with covered by the first amendment.
    Work with the experts on this one.

  • z
    August 19, 2019 at 8:54 pm

  • Sgt Shultz
    August 19, 2019 at 8:53 pm

    The guy is obviously lying about everything!

    Military rank and deployments;
    Every deployment comes with medals, awards and certificates, we all keep our medals!

    Pictures…we love to take pictures on deployment (making us look cool and love it, even though it sucks…and all deployments suck).

    Law School; Highly doubt he scored well on any assessment test of any kind and zero chance attended a prestigious law school.

    This guy knows one thing…how to lie and pretend to be someone he’s not.

  • Kay Loves Raw Dog
    August 19, 2019 at 8:35 pm

    Straight to comments here.
    I like how you kept this important story only half as long as Bristols blogs.
    Tell Bristol I ran into you know who Saturday and he’s still insisting he’s not the father. What a jerk!!!!

    August 19, 2019 at 8:14 pm

    Thank you for a specific targeted attack on a veteran. It’s what makes this site the best.

    August 19, 2019 at 8:06 pm

    Black criminals are beyond the pale said Biden in 93.

  • Julie the Jarhead
    August 19, 2019 at 8:06 pm

    I may be wrong, but I believe “stolen valor” is protected under the Free Speech clause of the First Amendment. (United States v. Alvarez) (I looked it up.)

    Plus … being a veteran and being a liar are not mutually exclusive concepts. Being a veteran and being a douche aren’t, either.

    • J TJ Fan
      August 19, 2019 at 10:04 pm

      And it doesn’t mean that you never need to work again

    • Klancy
      August 19, 2019 at 11:11 pm

      United States v Alvarez was 2012. Stolen Valor passed in 2013 thus negating US v Alvarez.

      • Julie the Jarhead
        August 20, 2019 at 6:00 am

        The original Stolen Valor Act, upon which this case was heard, was signed into law in 2006.

        I think, as vile as “stolen valor” is, that it should be protected under the First Amendment. If someone is such a douche that they want to pretend to be a veteran an have all those decorations, that’s his right.

  • Liz Warren
    August 19, 2019 at 4:34 pm

    I think this guy is an indian.

    • Chief Spreading Bull
      August 20, 2019 at 6:12 am

      I can confirm he’s a member of the Liarwatha tribe.

      Chief Spreading Bull
      Chief of the Liarwathas
      Sire to US Senator from Masshole

  • Sprinkle Pig
    August 19, 2019 at 4:26 pm

    TL-DR it all. I read most of it and I’ll say this any veteran that calls themselves a “combat veteran” is usually either. I am a veteran who served multiple tours in Iraq from 03-04 and 06-07 in the Army. This guy is a fucking clown! He is lying 100 fucking percent. I work at the VA and can and will do a check for you if you want. I can find out exactly what he is on Wednesday if you want. I have one day left of vacation tomorrow lol.

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