Mainstream Media Fails

Telegram And Gazette Compared Turtleboy To ISIS

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A common complaint people have about Turtleboy Sports is the anonymity factor. But the Telegram and Gazette, which fancies itself a real newspaper, also uses anonymity with their “editorials.” So I have no idea what useless moron over there wrote this masterpiece the other day about the DOJ race discussion. But you simply MUST read what they’re writing about Turtleboy Sports. Their drivel is in italics and our rational hot takes follow in bold.

What developed over the course of the evening was a fairly extensive discourse about blog posts. The mayor, in his opening remarks referenced websites, saying “their anger and hate has no place in our community.” Later in remarks by others, Turtle Boy Sports was mentioned in a presentation by Wanda Alvarado Eaton, who described posts attacking her and the appropriation of video, photos and posts pulled from her personal Facebook page for use by the site. The site, which has what might charitably be described as an “Animal House” vibe, has targeted individuals participating in the Dialogues with vile humor and scatological attacks. As stated in at least one post on the site, the point is to get clicks. People singled out in these attacks have said they feel threatened.

Well, if that isn’t the pot calling the kettle black. Newsflash – the Telegram employs Spanky McFarlane and Old Balls. You people INVENTED click bait. We’re all in this game together. Your meager bare bones salary at the Telegram is paid for by the outrageous prices you charge your advertisers. But they wouldn’t pay you a dime if you weren’t getting page views. That’s why they let Old Balls off his leash, get the clicks, and then shut down his columns week after week. 

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How threatened is the Telegram about Turtleboy Sports though? This is what they’re resorting to? Calling TBS “Animal House?” Because we “target” individuals who participate in these dialogues with “vile humor and scatological attacks”? First of all, I didn’t  even know what scatological meant, so I had to look it up:

Screen Shot 2015-07-16 at 9.15.43 PM

Did this anonymous editor just call TBS a faces slinger? Like, we throw poop at people? Newsflash – we call out frauds when we see them. We don’t THROW the poop, we IDENTIFY it. Wanda talked shit about teachers. She implied that white teachers couldn’t possibly teach minority students effectively. She made herself a public figure by doing so. Then she made a couple hilarious Youtube videos about the Asian chicks in her basement. Now she’s trying to pretend like she’s some sort of victim. She made herself a public figure and in doing so made herself fair game for criticism. And quite frankly, criticizing illiterate malcontents who call neighborhood children “ratchet” is almost too easy. 

There’s a quote sometimes attributed to H.L. Mencken: “It is the duty of a newspaper to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.” On this site, that seems turned on its head.

Look, I know you’re trying to sound wise here, but you’re only proving our point. “It is the duty of a newspaper to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.” This is exactly what Turtleboy Sports does. We stand up for the common man and woman who is sick of being called racist, sick of having our cars blocked by hippies, and sick of Pools by Andrews taking naps on the clock. 

The “comfortable” ones, are the people we are “afflicting.” WE are the ones going after the establishment, which is using OUR money to pay illegal organizations like Mosaic to organize criminals acts. Joe Petty, Ed Augustus, Brenda Jenkins, Joyce McNickles. THOSE PEOPLE are the establishment. They’re all getting paid and they’re all corrupt, so we go after them. You should try it sometime. 

On one level, it’s just a distraction from important business impacting the community. On another level, Monday night’s discussion came on the same day that secret indictments were disclosed about an apparently unbalanced 23-year-old Massachusetts man alleged to have been inspired by ISIS postings to plot a terrorist attack on a university.

Wait…….what??? What just happened here? We went from talking about afflicting the comfortable to an ISIS terror plot? Did the Telegram and Gazette really just suggest that Turtleboy Sports is somehow responsible for that dooshnozzle form Adams who planned a terrorist attack?

LOL. Newsflash – Turtleboy isn’t a distraction from business impacting the community. Turtleboy is shining the light on business impacting the community.


Attorney General Maura Healey, who attended Monday’s session as a speaker and who heard Ms. Alvarado Eaton’s presentation, said in an interview after the event that people should speak out against such attacks, but also doesn’t want to dignify the site by giving it attention. “It’s incredibly divisive and dangerous,” she said.

“It’s intended to provoke,” she said. “To some, it’s experienced as a threat, harassment.”

Ms. Healey indicated she’s well aware of first amendment protections, adding, “I want to take a look at it and keep our options open,” she said. “It’s action that has a consequence,” and then ticked off, “threats, harassment, bullying, defamation, slander and libel.”

I hate to break it to you, but Maura Healey obviously doesn’t mean any of that. This is what we like to call “lip service.” It’s what politicians do. They promise morons like Wanda things that they have no intention of following up on. Obviously the Attorney General has no authority to investigate a blog called “Turtleboy Sports.” I mean, she can if she wants to. She’ll see all the money we’ve raised for charity, our takes on a shark in Chatham, and videos of Mike Felger getting banned from Worcester. 

But she won’t see anything illegal, that’s for sure. Because unfortunately for the hippies, we have free speech in this country. And they fucking HATE that. Because the truth exposes them for being the frauds that they are. Wanda said it all the other day:

“Legally, I’m told he can do it,” Ms. Alvarado Eaton said. “I say, no he can’t.”

Breaking news – local woman with broken caps lock says first amendment doesn’t apply to local blog!! 

Yea, sorry Wanda, but it doesn’t really matter what you think. LOL. I mean, it’s no surprise that Wanda thinks this, but the fact that the editor from the Telegram believes it too is hilarious. If anything, Maura Healey will be investigating the illegal actions of Mosaic Cultural Complex, and if she has enough time she’ll try to figure up what’s up with those Asian chicks in Wanda’s basement. 

The mere fact that this idiot editor is even recognizing the fact that we exist is hilarious. The Telegram has been around for over 100 years. Turtleboy was a free WordPress blog that a couple of bros started as a hobby last year. They’re obviously mad that every month we steal another one of their advertisers because we charge a fraction of what they do and get more pageviews. They can see the writing on the wall. They’re going down. Joe Petty’s going down. The whole damn system is going down. 

Turtleboy Sports Revolution. Ride it.  

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25 Comment(s)
  • CM
    July 17, 2015 at 12:25 pm

    I need a TurtleBoy Revolution T Shirt….. gotta make that happen

  • Maggie the Cat
    July 17, 2015 at 10:54 am

    We did not renew our subscription to the T&G either. Lots of people out here in real life are sick of the newspaper and the people it supports.

  • thibby
    July 17, 2015 at 10:45 am

    Turtle Boy for president…. get your pitchforks and broomsticks ready for the revolution. yeeeee haaaaaa……….

  • President Matt
    President Matt
    July 17, 2015 at 9:59 am

    The best part of the T&G word salad is they got the quote wrong. It comes from the fictional Irish bartender Mr. Dooley. And it is not a compliment to the newspaper profession.
    Whom ever the author of the editorial is, “scat” is the kindest way their work can be described.

  • Black
    July 17, 2015 at 9:05 am

    Turtle Boy is competition for the T&G.

    Our T&G subscription ran out. Didn’t re-subscribe. I’m sure lots of people have done the same.
    I have ZERO reason to go to their site anymore. It just plain s*cks.

    Keep up the good work, Turtle Boy!

  • strata
    July 17, 2015 at 8:35 am

    Speaking of anonymous, the T&G cut it’s own throat by changing “commenting” policy requiring names & social media verification to post. prior to that the T&G had hundreds and hundreds of comments on virtually every single article. View, visits, & clicks galore (which equates into $$$ as we all know). I hardly visit the site at all ….. just to keep on on some local stuff…. and there are minimal if not any at all comments. I loved commenting and would be on the site all the time when not working. I hardly visit (like many many others who have stopped viewing the site).

    It’s great, the morons that run the paper tried to silence conservative posters, but lost the majority of their liberal posters as well…. who had big mouths, but they didn’t want their identities revealed either. Right Otis? A total collapse of site traffic …….. more layoffs will follow I’m sure.

  • Howie the Car
    July 17, 2015 at 8:00 am

    Hope one of those lawyers whose advertises here is going to help you dude. You’re fucked.

  • Chris From Georgia
    July 17, 2015 at 7:45 am

    I’m surprised to hear that the T&G is still in business!!! The only good reasons for buying the T&G were the comics and word jumble. Did I mention that old copies made great tinder for your BBQ?

  • colleen
    July 17, 2015 at 7:05 am

    From Clive’s repetitive cop-hating column today:

    “The failure of the council to censure one of its members for being in bed with individuals whom many involved in the talks accused of spewing racist and ad hominem attacks against young people and their parents in this city is another colluding institutional practice that demeans the very constituency it claims to represent.”

    Nonsensical, run-on sentence, as usual….pretty sure he’s referring to TB. Good grief!

    • Wabbitt
      July 19, 2015 at 2:34 pm

      He sees his pocket mayor is about to go down, so he’s grasping at straws.

  • nick
    July 17, 2015 at 6:52 am

    woah Nellie; didn’t the pot smokin public assistance receiving granny call the head of the Worcester Housing Authority a bad person for trying to put people back to work who receive state aid? Then again, maybe Maura shold look into her disability; “SO I WANTED TO SHARE SOME INFORMATION ABOUT STUDENT LOANS N DISABILITY..I GOT A CALL TODAY ABOUT MY STUDENT LOAN I WILL NEVER PAY” because she claims she is disabled. So here we have a pot smoking granny who continues to rip off the system and TB is wearing the black hat. Can’t help but notice how she has hidden her pot smokin images.

  • Internet Lawyah
    July 17, 2015 at 6:07 am

    “Expression of the freest of speech,” not Ex Reason!

  • Internet Lawyah
    July 17, 2015 at 6:06 am

    Maura Healey is a Harvard educated attorney. She knows with certainty that the Turlte Boy blog is a protected ex
    Reason of the freest of speech-political speech. Satire is also up there in the panoply of speech which has been specifically cited in legal decisions as being among the most protected of speech.

    I’m sure politicians hated Saturday Night Live when it first came out and mocked politicians and other TV blowhards, but it grew until they were forced to say that they felt honored that SNL paid them any attention.

    There is a lesson there, Wanda. Last month you were a nobody languishing on public assistance. This week you got to be one of the favored few allowed to speak publicly in a government sponsored forum with elected city and state leaders. Who might you be thanking for that?

  • Clive's not racist, just ask him.
    July 17, 2015 at 4:23 am

    I NEED AN UPDATE ON WANDA’S HARBORED BASEMENT ASIANS!! Have they found a means to escape yet? Or are they just smoking some of her weed, and content with the current living arrangements?? So many questions.

    • WormtownorBust
      July 17, 2015 at 9:19 am

      Wanda is running a massage parlor out of her basement.

      • Wabbitt
        July 19, 2015 at 2:32 pm

        Or a nail salon.

  • oneopinion
    July 17, 2015 at 12:06 am

    Not only is Ms. Alvarado Eaton excellent at what she does, but she puts a face on the opposition to TB. I look forward to watching a thoughtful and spirited debate unfold between representatives of two different points of view.

  • Sign-Ception
    July 17, 2015 at 12:00 am

    Not sure what the hell is wrong with T&G and their hypocrisy. Newsflash TB Nation is NOT the ones spewing anti-government, anti-police, anti- US policy, anti- civil liberties, or anythings else related to such crap. We support the common people and the city. Why the hell are people trying to say there is “pandering to hardcore racist” or “people who want to cause harm and violence” just read the comments, read the articles and stop speaking with vague, unproven claims.

  • Common Sense Isn't So Common
    July 16, 2015 at 11:37 pm

    Hippies straight up. ” Rubbas “

  • Common Sense Isn't So Common
    July 16, 2015 at 11:29 pm

    T@G is basically 3-4 days behind your stuff. I say fuck em bring it on!!!

  • BobnMic
    July 16, 2015 at 10:21 pm

    Let the DOJ examine this site. Let them read every post. Not one post has been racist, anti-government as a whole (certain local politicians get outed for being lame but you read stuff like that everywhere) or anti-police or anti-anything normal in this life.

    It is the criminals rising up to try and make their criminal lives easier because law enforcement is doing too good of a job catching them. That is the big bitch here in this city and we the people of reasonable thought and consciousness do not and will buy into this utter insanity.

    • BobnMic
      July 16, 2015 at 10:26 pm

      *will NOT buy into this utter insanity

  • Nanny
    July 16, 2015 at 9:59 pm

    Thank you T&G for the promotion of this site. I don’t always agree with TB, but the writers give it straight and go out of the way to describe their motivations and intent.

    The T&G is an antique. A relic of the innocent old days when they were the primary source of slant in this previously one-horse town.

    Competition. Deal with it fossils at the T&G.

  • Boo Boo Bobby Gibbs
    July 16, 2015 at 9:27 pm

    we be ridin till the wheels fall off

    • GoneWest
      July 17, 2015 at 8:52 am


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