Mainstream Media Fails

Telegram Reporter Tom Caywood Quitting Proves Turtleboy Is Taking Over

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Want some more evidence that the Turtleboy Sports revolution is taking over the city’s media? Look no further than GoLocalWorcester’s report today about veteran Telegram & Gazette reporter Thomas Caywood quitting his job because he’s gotten one small pay raise in eight years, has had his health insurance premiums skyrocket, and his vacation days cut by a third.

Tom Caywood

Look, the problem with the Telegram and other mainstream outlets is that they’re run by morons. Anyone who employs Clive McFarlane for that long can’t be very bright. The fact of the matter is that it’s 2015 and people don’t just want news. They want HOT TAKES on the news. That’s what we do, and that’s why we’re stealing their audience.

Remember a couple weeks back we wrote about the Top 15 Cut Through Streets In WorcesterYea I don’t wanna tell the Telegram how to do their job, but that’s the kind of shit people like to read about. It’s also probably why the Telegram wrote about the same exact story a week later. People don’t wanna read Clive rabble on about how racist the police are day after day. They wanna know where the best high school keg spots are, what the worst streets for traffic in Worcester are, funny things people say about snow days, and traffic reports from the Shoppes at Blackstone Valley at Christmas time. They also would like the news on time, not 24 hours late like they did when the Toys for Tots robbery at the Lucky Dog Music Hall happened.

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I’d estimate that 80-90% of stories in the Telegram are copy and paste AP articles. Why the hell would anyone pay for that? There’s this magical thing called “The Internet” that can give us the stories the AP has published, along with hundreds of other FREE articles on it. But the Telegram actually wants you to pay for it, because they’re losing advertisers by the day, and SOMEONE has to pay Clive’s salary and health insurance.

The fact of the matter is that Turtleboy Sports, a company with a handful of writers that takes guest blogs from the community, gets more daily page views than the Telegram recently, a newspaper with hundreds of employees. That’s not just sad, it’s pathetic. Whether or not they want to come to grips with it, people would rather watch a rap video from Grafton Hill than read a bunch of regurgitated AP stories.

And just to show you how pathetic this newspaper is, check out their advertising rates for digital ads:

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So let me get this straight. It costs $948 per month, for a two month ad that will be seen 170,000 times each month? LOL. Turtleboy Sports is going to get about 350,000 page views for January. For the same exact number of page views in the Telegram is costs you $3,000 a month!! Ya got that? If you commit to the whole year it’s $18,000!! Serious question, how stupid do you have to be to pay that? I mean, no offense if you’re one of those schmucks, but why don’t you just come over my house and we’ll burn your money for you?


So how can they get away with charging prices like that? Because someone has to pay their staff to write shit that no one reads anymore. Pretty sound way to run a business. I don’t always agree with Tom Caywood’s writing, but the fact of the matter is that he was one of a handful of writers who actually had a following at that paper. He brought value to them and they rewarded him with what amounted to a 14% pay cut and less vacation time.

The bottom line is that if you’re not advertising with Turtleboy Sports then I feel bad for you. Our audience grows by the day and people who advertise with us get business immediately. Our prices basically make us the Price Rite of news media. Email us at if you’d like to get with the times and not slowly go out of business like the Telegram & Gazette.

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