Turtleboy Investigates

The Other Guy Who Stiffed Compass Tavern, Shot Girls On $143 Tab Has Been Identified, Paid His Tab And Apologized – Investigation Completed

The Other Guy Who Stiffed Compass Tavern, Shot Girls On $143 Tab Has Been Identified, Paid His Tab And Apologized – Investigation Completed

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Update on the two winners who skipped on their $143 tab at Compass Tavern. Yesterday we identified the gentlemen on the left as Jason Marchand of Brimfield:


The guy on the right is his buddy from Tantasqua, Matt Gentile.


And in one of the most ironic moves of all time, this is his profile picture on Facebook:


Yup. A turtle. The same animal that ultimately brought him to justice. We messaged him on Facebook today and urged him to go down to Compass and pay his tab. Shortly afterwards we received confirmation that he did so. This matter is finished. Justice has been served. All parties have been repaid and are satisfied with the results. Let that be a lesson – pay your bills and don’t be a dooshnozzle because Turtleboy is always watching fam!




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16 Comment(s)
  • Rodgers
    January 21, 2017 at 1:12 am

    What if the shoe was on the other foot? I’m positive if that happened to you, you’d blast them all over the computer too !! && they frighten deserve it.
    Before you think about Chewing& screwing, think about how much $$ it cost to take to serve your ass. Your not only screwing the company, your also screwing the employees too.

  • FatFingrlou
    January 20, 2017 at 5:13 pm

    Case File 143…Not my memory of cold tea.

    Case Closed!

    Play the tortoise shell bongos!

  • Jafreese
    January 20, 2017 at 9:00 am

    Always think “What would TB do?”

  • Publius
    January 20, 2017 at 7:50 am

    Another case solved by TB.

  • Mistressveila
    January 20, 2017 at 1:34 am

    Good,I’m glad that was fixed ..did young young woman who’s the shot girl finally get paid? I hope so ..

  • Elvera Boland
    January 19, 2017 at 11:19 pm

    Your awesome Turtleboy!!!

  • BobnMic
    January 19, 2017 at 11:05 pm

    Nice job TB. They both still got out of it easy in my opinion. They could have been charged criminally and be forced to pay back the balance due along with other fines although they were not identified as such at the time. It seems if they were not publically shamed then that tab would never have been paid.

    How could they just walk out without as much as discussing the bill and who paid what?

    • BobnMic's Gerbil
      January 20, 2017 at 11:24 am

      You and the gimp need to have a discussion on who’s going to pay for my Hartz treats. If you don’t have any Hartz treats for our next felching session, I’m just going to lay there and not do anything at all. We’ll see how you like a motionless gerbil.

      • BobnMic's Blow Up Wife
        January 20, 2017 at 11:27 am

        Little gerbil. Trust me when I say he won’t care if you just lay there and do nothing. That’s what I do all the time and he still gets his rocks off anyways. I think he’s just happy whenever something is stuffed up his butt.

        Hey! I have an idea. You should try and hide next to his buttplug and maybe he’ll pick that up instead of you. It’s worth a shot. Let me know how that works out for you.

  • wtatnuckgangsta
    January 19, 2017 at 10:59 pm

    I’m nowhere near Worcester anymore and I live a Turtle-fearing life. I love you…but not as a man loves a woman, but as a dear reptile friend.

  • Sheriff BobnMic
    January 19, 2017 at 10:16 pm

    Oh man oh man… I was ready to kick into full gear! One swift movement and this here flashlight will be the death of them!

    • BobnMic's Gaping Anus
      January 20, 2017 at 11:18 am

      My asshole can personally vouch that you don’t want Sheriff Bob’s flashlight joining in the fun.

      • BobnMic's Gerbil
        January 20, 2017 at 11:19 am

        I wish Sheriff Bob would toss me that flashlight so I can find my way out of this dark tunnel.

  • Got off easy
    January 19, 2017 at 10:14 pm

    Thieves were busted and finally had to pay up. Remember, because they were caught, put on public display.

  • Shackleford
    January 19, 2017 at 10:03 pm

    My only goal in life is to never end up on TB, above the comments at least.

  • EmfnT
    January 19, 2017 at 10:00 pm

    Love. It.

    Keep it up TB!

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