This Day In History

This Day In History: The Beatles Come To America, Castro Makes Things Awkward In Cuba, Henry Clay Pulls A Hillary

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Here’s some famous crap that happened on February 7.

  • 1839 Henry Clay declares in Senate “I had rather be right than president”. 

Henry Clay said this because he’s a loser. That will always be his legacy. Him and William Jennings Bryan are the only guys to ever run for President three times, and lose every single time. However, if Hillary runs again in 2020, she’d be the third. And unlike Henry Clay, she would rather be president than be right. Henry Clay was actually a good shit, and one of the most effective senators in American history. “The Great Compromiser” got shit done in a way that very few senators have the ability to now, because it’s a bunch of Pochantonses and Lyin Teds now. He started his career off by driving American into a stupid war with Britain in 1812, but then rebounded nicely as a “westerner” (Kentucky) who realized that in order for America to be great we needed some roads and canals and tariffs and industries and shit, or we’d be forever reliant on trade with those douchebags in England. Thus began the modernization of the wilderness and the beginning of a self-sufficient American empire. Because he was from a border state he helped craft the Missouri Compromise, and a number of other temporary bandaids that delayed the Civil War, but at least he gave it a shot.

 

Because we were the reason Cuba became independent in the first place, Cuba used to be a place for Americans to go on vacation because it’s so close to Florida. Land owners were thriving, but a lot of people were being left behind, and when that happens you have the breeding grounds for communism. Life was good for the elites as long as the dictator we put in power (Batista) was running the show. He let the mafia run casinos down there and put all the communists in prison. Then one day the communists overthrew him, kicked the mafia out, redistributed privately owned land, allied with the Soviet Union, and began stockpiling nuclear weapons 90 miles from American soil. Not good.

 

  • 1962 US President JFK begins blockade of Cuba by banning all Cuban imports and exports.

You still can’t get Cuban cigars, unless you’re close personal friends with Jim McGovern. Blockades are hostile acts of war. Countries, especially islands, cannot exist without trade. They need shit they don’t have, and they need to sell shit to other countries in order to keep people employed in their country. When a world power like America blockades your ass, you slowly die. Of course the real reason we were blockading them is because their trading partner was the Soviet Union, and they were importing nuclear warheads. Shit got crazy later on in the year.

 

  • 1964 Beatles land at NY’s JFK airport, for 1st US tour

The Beatles were already so popular in England, but anyone who wants to make money has to come to America, because we have all the white girls with disposable income. Eventually the Beatles stopped touring because no one could hear their music over all the mindless creaming. They simply don’t make music like this anymore.

 

 

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5 Comment(s)
  • The Who is Still Rocking Today
    February 7, 2019 at 6:46 pm

    Beatles are/were way overrated. Had a few decent songs but mostly it was just formulaic pop drivel. ’60’s equivalent to rap today.

  • Old Balls
    February 7, 2019 at 9:55 am

    They performed at Suffolk Downs for some unknown reason.

  • Dick Scratcher
    February 7, 2019 at 6:53 am

    I love a bit of mindless creaming.

  • Siskel
    February 7, 2019 at 6:19 am

    Two thumbs up

  • Weak sauce
    February 7, 2019 at 2:12 am

    Lost a little steam at the end.

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