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Washington Post: There will be one very big no-show for the New England Patriots’ ceremony with President Obama at the White House on Thursday afternoon.

Quarterback Tom Brady will not be on the scene to celebrate the team’s fourth Super Bowl victory. Brady, according to several reports out of Boston, had a prior family commitment.

There will be no such conflict May 2, though, when Brady reportedly will be ringside for the Floyd Mayweather Jr.-Manny Pacquiao fight in Las Vegas. Brady, according to SI.com’s Greg Bishop, went straight to the top, to CBS’ pooh-bah Leslie Moonves, to secure ducats.

I think we can all agree that the saddest person in America today is this man right here:

That right there is the face you made when you realized your Aaron Hernandez jersey was a really bad investment.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – the thing I dig the most about President Obama is his sports fandom. That’s why I like stuff like this and when he picks his bracket (which we basically called 48 hours in advance). Because even though he’s a millionaire that I have very little in common with, I feel like at heart he wants nothing more than to sit down and shoot the shit about sports.

But since we live in America, where MSNBC and FoxNews dictate our political conversations, even a harmless event like this turns into a bunch of blowhards going off on Obama.

Newsflash – Tom Brady isn’t skipping the White House because he’s got a beef with Obama. He’s skipping it because Obama is beneath him. That’s what this comes down to. Brady is the closest thing we have to a God. Obama once said that if he had a son he’d look like Trayvon Martin. Well, if God had a second son he’d look like Tom Brady.

You think Tom Brady has time to just take a day off from dominating the world and go to the White House for a photo op? Yea, he’d go if he didn’t have a million other important things to do that day. Brady’s been to the White House so many times that he’s bored with it. Sure, for guys like Gronk and Chandler Jones this is wicked cool because they’ve never had the chance to go there before. Hell, I know the punter and Amendildo had the time of their lives today:

But Brady’s been going to the White House since they were in diapers.

So no, this is NOT even close to the same thing as Tim Thomas, which every Yahoo on Facebook seems to think is the case:

Oh for fuck’s sake. First of all, this would’ve been Brady’s fourth trip to the White House. For Tim Thomas is was his first, last, and only chance.

Secondly, Brady’s not going because he’s got plans. You try rescheduling a date with a hot Brazilian woman. Let me know how that goes. Meanwhile, Tim Thomas didn’t go to the White House specifically because he didn’t wanna shake hands with Obama – on account of all the fascism.

Most importantly, Tim Thomas was one of two or three Americans on a team full of foreigners getting an award at the house where the leader of America lives. The fact that he let a bunch of Fins, Czechs, and free-loading Canadians represent the Bruins at the White House is a disgrace.

Newsflash – the reason Tim Thomas didn’t go to the White House was because he’s the turd in the punch bowl who has to bring up politics every chance he gets. These people are the worst. They’re the ones who find a million different articles from far left or far right publications and post them on Facebook as they hunker down and wait for the impending apocalypse. I can’t tell you how many of these people I’ve had to block over the years.

I don’t give a shit who the President is – it’s the fact that you’re at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave that matters. It’s a tradition. It’s cool. It’s apolitical and non-partisan. If you’re one of those people who wants to make it political then you’re probably the worst person in the world to bring to a party. Oh yea, and our team is named after the people who created the country that made an elected president a “thing.”

Do I think Obama is hot shit. Nope. But the fact of the matter is he got elected. Twice. That’s how democracy works. You don’t get to take your ball and go home just because your guy lost. If you want something to really complain about, say something about this fraud being there:

Here’s a fact – Elizabeth Warren doesn’t give a fuck about football. She’s pretending to take an interest in the Patriots because pretending to be things that she’s not is what she does better than anyone else. Say what you want about Obama – he actually likes sports.

At the end of the day all that ended up happening is they gave Obama a jersey and he made a wisecrack about Deflategate. Then Belichick gave him a thumbs down and everyone had a good laugh. Because this whole show is nothing more than a mini-roast.

I don’t care what side of the aisle you’re on politically. But if you’re one of those “Obama is the muslim anti-christ, show me his birth certificate, worst president ever” kind of people, you are nothing but amusement for this Turtleboy. Check out some of the dumb things people are saying on the Facebook machine:

I know right. Ten years ago I had all these sweet, badass American freedoms. Now I’m basically living in communist Sweden.

Yea, I’m sure Wayne Hiller wouldn’t go to the White House if he was invited. Although that’s pretty easy to say when there is never, ever, ever even the most remote chance you’d ever be given such an invitation. But I’m glad to know EXACTLY what he would do in that hypothetical, imaginary situation.

Yea, let’s lock his ass up!!! That’s what we do in America when we don’t like our leaders. Send em to jail!!

Ummm, if you don’t like Obama, wouldn’t you WANT to meet him? How many opportunities do you get to rip into the leader of the free world to their face? Yea, I’m sure ranting on Facebook to your 240 friends is a lot more effective. Does Obama have cooties or something? Because Pat Droney would NEVER get a chance to sit down and give Obama a piece of his mind. So wouldn’t he wanna jump on the chance to get to meet Obama and tell him how much of a war criminal socialist naniburger he is?

You had me at Obummer.

Alleged Super Bowl champs? The butthurt is strong in this one. Where did Bill Belichick touch you George Harshorn Jr?

Anyway, the Patriots are still the World Champions. And next year after we overcome the loss of the best cornerback in the NFL and win the Super Bowl again, maybe, just MAYBE, Tom Brady will consider scheduling Obama for his last Super Bowl visit as President of the United States. We’ll see if him and Giselle have enough time.

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