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So it has come to our attention that Worcester State “University” is apparently trying to take the fields from behind Chandler Magnet Elementary School and turn them into a parking lot. The problem with the U is that they are primarily a commuter school, but they won’t stop building crap on their limited land. Because apparently thinking ahead isn’t something they’re good at. Every five minutes there’s some new state of the art building under construction over there. Which is fine, but it’s their problem, not ours.

Here’s an overview of what the area looks like:

This is the proposed area they wanna build the parking lot on:

Look, the west side of this city is like the best thing we have going for ourselves. They pay most of the taxes and they require the least amount of city services. All we ask is that we get to keep it looking nice. That’s it. There’s a reason road races are almost exclusively held on this side of the city. Because it’s pleasant looking, and parks like this are part of the reason why.

Chandler Magnet sits at the corner of Chandler and May Street, directly across Chandler St from Worcester State.

To get to the field you enter the teacher’s parking lot on May Street and take a right up the hill.

But if you’re a kid growing up on this side of the city you just cut through the woods or hopped this fence on Moore Ave.

So as you can tell, I think this proposal sucks for several reasons. First of all Worcester State, you’re already on my shit list because of this atrocity:

I was gonna save that picture for an upcoming blog about the most pointless traffic lights in Worcester. But now you’ve made me bust it out early. Airport Road used to be a driver’s paradise. Over 2.5 miles of double lane divided road that brings from Tatnuck to Webster Square. Then Worcester State put their filthy paws on it with this dumbass parking lot that no one uses. But guess what? It doesn’t stop the light from turning red all the freaking time!! I’ve never seen a single car come out of this parking lot before, but yet it’s red every time I approach it.

Apparently the reason they wanna build a lot at Chandler Magnet is because students aren’t using this lot and they’re still parking on the neighbor’s streets. Any moron could’ve told you that was gonna happen. If I was in college there is no freaking way I’m parking three miles away from the school and waiting for the shuttle to bring my ass to class. No way.

I lived a five minute walk from half of my classes at Fitchburg State and even that kept me from going to Microeconomics too many times to count. And when I did go to class I usually was running because I waited until the very last second to leave. There’s just no way possible I would factor in the extra time it would take to park that far away, wait for the shuttle to get to class, sit through a class, and then wait for the shuttle to go back to the parking lot. Bong rips would’ve won that internal struggle 9 times out of 10.

Oh yea, and those fields by Chandler are home to some of the greatest moments of a West Side boy’s childhood. Do you realize how many kids learned how to play baseball or soccer there? Probably in the millions. Then after you go through puberty that’s where you hide from the cops when they busted up a keg at Chandler woods. I feel bad for anyone who didn’t get to french kiss on this log:

The amount of priceless memories there are in the billions.

And we’re supposed to deny the future generations of these memories because Worcester State can’t figure out how to solve their own problems? Get out of my face with that jive.

How is this parking situation this difficult? You just put up a sign up on the side streets near the school that says you have to have a resident permit sticker if you wanna park on the street. If Professor Sonya Conner is still parking her Prius there, then tow it. Problem solved.

The worst part about this whole scam is that it’s already been in discussion in “secret meetings” with the school committee for over a year. Guess who’s been chairing those quorums? You guessed it – Mayor Joe Petty and superintendent Melinda Boone. Gee, Dr. Boone is keeping things on the hush-hush in order to protect her reputation? Never saw that one coming.

The problem with this whole thing is that it’s not a fair fight. Everyone knows the Worcester School Committee is run by morons. We’re talking about a bunch of people who have denied that there is a problem when four principals get punched in the face at North High and then gave Dr. Boone a raise for doing nothing about it. But Worcester State? They’ll have highly paid professional consultants on their side. Who do you think has the advantage going into this square-off?

And let’s suppose the city does sell this piece of land to Worcester State. What exactly do we get out of this? Do we all get a check in the mail? Do our taxes go down? I’m guessing no. So how do we benefit from this? Because all I see is a gigantic clusterfuck of traffic and the loss of precious childhood memories.

I guess there’s a public meeting about this on April 1st. I’m hoping that everyone gets there and Joe Petty says, “April Fools,” but then again that would require a personality. My question is, why would ANYONE from Worcester favor this? Like I said before, we get jack didley out of this deal. I would strongly encourage anyone who doesn’t want our brilliant school committee to give away this land for a pack of magic beans to show up and voice their opinion.

Meanwhile what you can do is email your school committee members and city council and let them know that this is simply unacceptable. A website called “Save the Chandler Fields” has been created already with links to all of their emails and phone numbers. They also have a Facebook page. Don’t forget – they work for you. Tell em Turtleboy sent you when you contact them, that way they’ll know we mean business. I’m serious though – nothing scares them more than the Turtleboy Sports Revolution. They literally want no part of it. They gave us cops at North High and they’ll give us this too. You mention that Turtleboy is on this one and they’ll have no choice but to do the right thing. They always do.

P.S. I would love it if someone read this entire blog out loud at the next City Council meeting. It’s not without precedent. After all, a Turtleboy blog was read out loud at the last Harwich Town Selectman meeting.

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