Nudniks

World’s Greatest Attention Whore Mark Prince Proclaims Innocence On Sturbridge PD Post Calling Him Out For Credit Card Cloning By Screaming Racism While His Shirtless Moobs Confirm He Dindu Nuffin

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It’s time for the inevitable return of the Great Dumb Nope, Mark Prince. If you don’t know who that is, I envy you. Markie has been featured on Turtleboy Sports for being a pathetic sack of lying, crack smoking crap. He was first brought to our attention when the Turtlegram And Gazette did a puff piece on how he became a hero by being a reformed thug turned sportsball star. He then decided to pull a chew and screw right after hitting on the bartender, while on a date with his mistress. Then there was that time he faked cancer, threatened suicide and called his estranged daughter who called him out on his bullshit a liar, all while messaging us non-stop and pretty much driving everyone here up a fucking wall with his many, many notifications (I nearly threw my computer out the window). Turns out, Markie is the white elephant gift that no one wants, but still ends up coming back to you.

This time, we got about 20 messages telling us that a credit card fraud wanted by the Sturbridge police looked a lot like Markie:

 

While there is a strong resemblance, we don’t believe that’s actually him. This guy’s facial structure and body type is very similar to Markie’s, but when shown side by side you can see they’re not the same dude:

 

It was tricky as hell trying to figure this out and a lot of people were absolutely convinced without a doubt that this was Mark Prince:

But it’s not. Trust me, I’m as disappointed as you are. It’s not that I like to see people fail, but I do enjoy when assholes get caught in the act of being assholes. Unfortunately, this particular asshole is innocent for once. However, he went about trying to prove his innocence in the most laughable way you could possibly imagine, shirtless and playing victim to racism:

“Contact me via messenger”= “I didn’t pay my cell phone bill and I’m using my neighbor’s wi-fi.”

What the shit!? No one thought that this person was Mark based on skin color, everyone thought that was him because they look damn near the same! These two men are so similar looking that it took us a couple of days to decide whether or not it was him. The deciding factor being the tattoos. How in the hell is it racist to note that two men who happen to be black look almost exactly alike!? The resemblance between these two is fucking remarkable and pretty crazy. How is that racist!?

 

Can we discuss the ink for a minute? Dude, you have a Transformers tattoo on your man tittie. Your “moob” is a Transformer. What does it transform into, a respectable person or upstanding citizen? Say you took a woman out on a date, would it actually pay? And I mean a date with a real woman, not the one you made up:

 

Keep in mind this guy is over 40 years old and still lying about having a girlfriend. That’s some of the worst pathological instability I’ve ever seen, and I work for Turtleboy Sports where I encounter crazy like y’all have never seen on an hourly basis. I’ll admit that I often forget people we feature within an hour of reading, or even sometimes writing about them, but I’ve remembered Markie since day one. He’s like herpes! As soon as you think it’s safe to play there’s an outbreak. Hell, prior to this story, this insane lie was sent in, but it wasn’t so newsworthy on its own:

 

“Deathly allergic” NO. As someone who’s actually deathly allergic to more things than any human should ever have reactions to, I can tell you that Claritin doesn’t do shit for the type of allergy he’s referring to. You know what you need when you’re deathly allergic and exposed to your allergen? An EpiPen filled with adrenaline to open the airways that are constricted in such a way that without it you would fucking die. This is such a bullshit thing to lie about, too. Fucking nonsense, just for the sake of lying. He’s the world’s greatest attention whore.

Let’s get back to this picture though, with the flat brimmed hat that may be a flat brimmed Bulls hat:

I can just about guarantee that he already had the picture on his phone prior to posting this to clear his name. He’s just that kind of sad, attention starved loser that would either post some dumb shit like this on his FB page (which is pretty locked down at the moment for some reason), or he’s got this on the ready for when he’s talking to any lady who might give him 2 minutes of her time. You know damn well he sends these types of “tying to be sexy, but failing miserably” pictures to women. I wouldn’t put it past him to have sent dick pics. If anyone has those, send them to Abi…that bitch is thirsty. Actually, they’d make a lovely couple. Her chubby red-headed IBS self and his moob rocking, marshmallow Transformer dad bod… Ugh, I just threw up in my mouth. Gross.

Moving on, Markie is an attention seeking, chewing and screwing, cheating, pathologically lying poopsmooch. However, Markie didn’t illegally use and/or clone a credit card in Sturbridge. Mystery solved. He’s absolutely a sheisty fuck and definitely someone to avoid in day-to-day life, however he dindu nuffin…this time.

To everyone who is diappointed that you were mistaken in identifying Markie as the credit card cloning culprit, just remember to #behappy:

 

 

I’m the one you up or go see when you need to laugh, cry, reminisce, cry or be encouraged

Not gonna lie, that literally made me laugh out loud. See you guys next time Markie does some stupid shit that lands him right back here. I assure you, it won’t be long.

6 Comment(s)
  • Sonny Bono
    September 12, 2018 at 9:04 pm

    “Black victimization is a myth, black criminality is not” – Facts

  • Get to work
    September 12, 2018 at 7:19 pm

    Any id on the white bitch who supposedly held his phone hostage for 3 hours? Id like to hear her side of the story so that, if true, we can avoid dealing with that type of trash.

  • The Negro Problem
    September 12, 2018 at 5:43 pm

    What’s the real reason why Negroes take a knee during the National Anthem?

    Negroes like Mark Prince.

  • Liar
    September 12, 2018 at 3:12 pm

    Last time he said he would post a video of him with the girl who “stole his phone”.

  • ThisIsMySarcasticTone
    September 12, 2018 at 2:52 pm

    I hate that no one ever points out his eyes are clearly open in the photo with the sunglasses just look between the bridge of the frame.

    • fml
      September 12, 2018 at 3:53 pm

      Uh, TBS already DID report that in their blog about him (that his eyes are clearly opened) Read the stories next time and not just the comments.

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