Sports

Aaron Hernandez Lawyer Is Fantastic Television

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So I was watching Aaron Hernandez’ murder trial today and it was pretty interesting. I assumed this was an open and shut case. Everyone knows Aaron Hernandez is a psychopathic murderer. So I was wondering what angle the defense was gonna take. I mean, they pretty much have every possible piece of evidence against him except for the murder weapon. But his lawyer is fantastic television. The first thing he said was

“Aaron Hernandez is innocent.”

Huh? What the…….? Look, I’ve seen way, way too many movies and TV programs where the guy everyone thought did it was wrongfully accused. It’s always a heartwarming tale. I REALLY believed this guy. I would probably be the worst juror in world history. Why would he say he’s innocent? Not just not guilty. Innocent. How could anyone say that with a straight face? This guy’s got something. He knows something we all don’t know and I can’t wait to see what it is. I’m fully expecting him to be on the Oakland Raiders in for training camp.

I think he’s gonna go after this kid:

One of the first witnesses called by the prosecution was high school student Matthew Kent, who found Lloyd’s body. He testified that he was jogging home from a gym when he saw Lloyd on the ground. He called out to the man.

“I got no response,” Kent said. “I was concerned.”

Oh yea? That’s pretty convenient that you just happened to be “jogging” by an industrial park. I remember a couple years back some jogger was just running along the side of the ride when he found a skull. Turns out the guy was running a prostitute smuggling ring out of Taunton. Your honor, joggers end up being the killers 9 times out of 10. I rest my case.

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The guy wouldn’t stop calling Odin Lloyd his “friend” too:

Fee said Hernandez had no motive to kill Lloyd. He described the victim as one of his client’s “partying pals” who was known as the “blunt master” for the marijuana cigars he often procured for Hernandez.

Apparently that’s his defense plan. They were boys. Odin Lloyd rolled blunts for Aaron Hernandez. You don’t kill your boys, and you certainly don’t kill boys who can roll blunts. Case closed.

He had one more trick in the bag though:

Odin called Aaron, ‘dis nigga.'” 

Rolling Blunts and white guys droppin the “n” bomb on live TV? This trial is gonna be awesome.

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