WTF

Alaska Airlines Returns To Seattle Because Of Terrorist – Oh Wait, It’s Just A Guy Who Fell Asleep In The Cargo Space

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WCVB: Flight 448 had just taken off Monday afternoon when the pilot heard banging from down below, the airline said in a news release. The captain immediately returned to Seattle-Tacoma International and declared an emergency for priority landing.

After the plane landed a ramp agent came out from the front cargo hold, which Alaska says is pressurized and temperature-controlled.

“Upon exiting, he told authorities he had fallen asleep,” the airline said.

The worker, an employee of Menzies Aviation, walked off the plane and appeared OK, but was taken to a hospital as a precaution.

Alaska said it is still investigating the incident. The plane was airborne for 14 minutes.

Passengers were later told about the situation.

“They just said there was someone in the cargo hold and he’s been escorted off and taken away,” she said.

The flight departed again at 3:52 p.m. and was expected to arrive in Los Angeles at 6:27, about 80 minutes late, according to the airline’s website.

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First of all, why does Alaska Airlines fly from Seattle to Los Angeles? How does that make any sense? That’s like the Martha’s Vineyard ferry taking you to Nova Scotia. And how does anyone fall asleep on the job in Seattle? There’s a Starbucks every five feet. That whole city is fueled by overpriced liquid crack.

But seriously, how the hell does this happen? The dude fell asleep in the cargo hold? At 3 PM? How does that even happen? Millions of adults fantasize about being able to take a 3 PM nap, but this guy lived the dream.

So apparently this guy’s job is to load your checked bags into the cargo space on the plane. This means he had to ride up one of those conveyer belts, step INTO the cargo space, and somehow while loading bags into the space he said to himself, “this hollow metal space looks comfortable – I’m gonna lie down.”

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Now keep in mind, he can’t close the cargo door from the inside. And more importantly – why would he? That means someone else locked his ass in there. So not only did this jackwagon not notice that someone had slammed the door, thus sealing his fate inside the cargo space, but the other guy somehow didn’t notice his sleeping coworker nestled amongst a sea of luggage. This is why I NEVER check bags. Because these are the people that handle them.

But seriously, how’d you like to wake up from a nap one day and find yourself in this guy’s situation. I’m sure half of you reading this right now have been sitting at your desk one day, after a long night with your little Turtleboy Jr., when your boss catches you right after you begin to doze off. Now imagine that same situation happening but instead of sitting at your desk and apologizing to Mr. Krueger, you’re in the cargo space of a 727 and you’re screaming for anyone who can hear you.

The bottom line is this guy should’ve sucked it up and quit whining. How long does it take to fly from Seattle to Los Angeles? Two, two and a half hours? Deal with it and go back to sleep pretty boy. Accept the fact that you just got a free ride to LA. Instead this dooshnozzle starts freaking out and makes everyone think they’re in some sort of terrorist situation. Next time this happens to you just go back to sleep.

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