Sports

Anyone Who Thinks Ronda Rousey Could Beat Up Floyd Mayweather Is Delusional

Want to have your business advert seen by over 900,000 people per month? Email us at [email protected] for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook

Free Tom Brady

Click the picture to buy your Free Tom Brady/Turtleboy or Je Suis Tom Brady/Turtleboy t-shirts.

Turtleboy Sports bumper stickers

Click here to buy your I Am Turtleboy bumper stickers and decals.

 

 

 

Everyone’s been buzzing about the Ronda Rousey’s 34 second knockout of Brazilian Bethe Correia in Rio de Janeiro the other night, so we had to chime in. First let’s look at the fight:

Now here’s this Turtleboy’s thoughts.

Women’s MMA boxing is about on the same level as women’s college basketball – there’s no competition so it kind of sucks. How excited can anyone possibly get for a 34 second fight? I’d rather watch Mayweather and Pacquiao dance around for 12 rounds because at least I can get drunk during that time. Same thing goes with women’s basketball – UConn didn’t lose by less than 50 this year. It doesn’t mean they’re the greatest thing since sliced bread, it just means the level of competition sucks.

Secondly, Ronda Rousey talks a lot of shit about Floyd Mayweather, and rightfully so. Mayweather is the definition of human garbage for the many, many instances of gross domestic abuse in which he has been the perpetrator. She’s called him out publicly several times, challenging him to fights. And I’m seeing a lot of people on social media actually debating who would win in a fight.

Stop. Just stop.

Ronda Rousey is a bad ass woman and all, and she could certainly kick MY ass. But give me a break already. Not only is Floyd Mayweather the greatest pound for pound boxer in the world right now, he also has a penis. Even Pacquiao and Canelo Alvarez couldn’t touch him, so how the hell is Ronda? Don’t get me wrong, she’s insane. But at the end of the day he has a penis so it’s not a fair fight. It’s science.

739_kpthba

Another thing lots of people are trying to say is that her and Serena Williams are the two greatest athletes in the world. Once again – stop. Just stop. How many men in the world participate in fighting sports like this? How many women? I have no way of ascertaining that number, but I’m willing to bet Turtleboy Jr’s Rob Roy Academy savings fund that the number of men exponentially outweighs women. Because there just aren’t that many women on this planet who wanna get in the octagon and kick the shit out of each other. Therefore being the best in the world at women’s MMA fighting is about the same thing as being world men’s fencing champion.

Bethe Correia is the male equivalent of Floyd Mayweather. For a woman who got knocked out in 34 seconds and was a Peter McNeely-esque underdog in Vegas, she sure did talk a lot of shit. I can understand if you’re a 3 to 1 dog, and you wanna psyche yourself up for the fight, then it’s OK to talk some smack.

But she was literally there for the payday. No one in the world thought she had any chance of winning. And not only did she talk shit, she also said that she hoped Ronda wouldn’t kill herself after she lost. Kind of a sensitive issue since Ronda’s father killed himself. In other words, she is the female version of Floyd Mayweather. And if Floyd ever lost a fight, I would imagine he would say something dooshy like this afterwards:

“I don’t regret anything. Everything I said was very sincere. It was my point of view and what I believed in. I think I did a great job. The event was wonderful. It wasn’t the result that I wanted, but I think everything that I said was something that I thought.

AKA, it was a nice pay day, and I helped sell a lot of pay per view sales by making light of my opponents deceased father.

ronda-round2-big-meme

The last thing I’m gonna say is this – I still think MMA sucks and boxing is a million times better. I’m just old school like that. MMA is cool and all, but it’s basically anarchy in an octagon. Too much homoerotic wrestling for this Turtleboy. Fighters should stand and face each other while beating the shit out of one another. This isn’t Goddamn Street Fighter. Boxing takes more skill, more tactics, and more endurance. It’s a gentlemen’s sport. MMA is organized savagery.

However, I realize the trend going on right now is that boxing is quickly becoming a sport for 45 year old Puerto Rican guys at the barbershop. But that’s all Floyd’s fault. He has spent the last decade destroying this beautiful sport. There has never, ever been a champion in the history of ANY sport that has done more damage to the brand than he has. He’s the undisputed champion and greatest pound for pound fighter in the world. But he dances to card victories and that’s just plain boring.

Luckily Floyd’s almost 40 so he’ll be retiring soon. I hold out hope that someone beats him before he retires, but regardless his legacy will go down as the guy who went undefeated because he ducked everyone and ruined the sport. The only fighter out there right now who can beat him is Miguel Cotto. If he gets a rematch, Cotto will win.

But more than likely we’ll have to wait for Floyd to retire. Once he does Canelo Alvarez or Triple G will take over as the face of the sport and boxing will become great once again. In the meantime we’ll have to watch Ronda Rousey kick the shit out of nudnik Brazilians in 34 seconds.

Want to have your business advert seen by over 900,000 people per month? Email us at [email protected] for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.

Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook

Free Tom Brady

Click the picture to buy your Free Tom Brady/Turtleboy or Je Suis Tom Brady/Turtleboy t-shirts.

Turtleboy Sports bumper stickers

Click here to buy your I Am Turtleboy bumper stickers and decals.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

7 Comment(s)
  • B
    December 31, 2016 at 1:53 am

    The second round meme has a whole new meaning now hahahahahaha. Also, you really should proofread your writing…

  • BobnMic
    August 4, 2015 at 1:30 pm

    I think Rhonda kicking my ass would be….. I dunno……. kinda hot! 😀

  • lol
    August 3, 2015 at 11:12 pm

    rhonda arouse me

  • RSoxGuy
    August 3, 2015 at 12:06 pm

    I dunno about Floyd even with all the experience he has beating women. All joking aside, Floyd would K.O. her in seconds. he never gets hit and throws punches with speed and power Rhonda has never faced before. Man vs Woman is rarely ever an even match.

    Rhonda is smoking hot and a nasty bitch in the ring. She would whoop my ass in a hurry.

    That being said, Bill Cosby would knock her ass out.

  • Larry Mondello
    August 3, 2015 at 8:34 am

    She’s a great athlete but against Mayweather? Forget about it. Boxing can be a beautiful competitve sport because of the rules, otherwise it’s just a bar room back alley street fight. Floyd is the best pound for pound but a boring tactician who simply does not fight often enough. Not saying we should go back to the days when Harry Greb fought 30 times a year but at least Hagler would defend his title every few months or so. Floyd Mayweather is one big reason why boxing sucks right now.

  • Finnish Goalie
    August 3, 2015 at 7:03 am

    Well, I would figure this will be the weekly blog in which many comments will state how they loved the blog until now, but are now angry and done with it.

    Never followed either boxing or MMA, but I believe in a true boxing match, Floyd wins. I would imagine if it was by other rules she has a great opportunity to get him, but if he could prolong the fight, he’d probably survive it.

  • Wabbitt
    wabbitt
    August 3, 2015 at 2:06 am

    I wouldn’t last more than 34 seconds with Rhonda Rousey either. If you know what I mean.

Comment on this Post

RELATED POSTS
Who Did A Better Job Of Cheating: Jason Kidd or Mike Tomlin?
Cleveland Browns Backup QB Is Best Kept Freak Show In NFL
Priceless Fan Reactions to Alabama-Auburn Game As BCS Fails Again In It’s Final Season