Apparently In Texas Rich Kids Like Ethan Couch Just Run Four People Over, Kill Them And Say They Have “Affluenza”

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A Turtleboysports reader recently informed me of this story. I have no idea how I hadn’t heard of this or why it wasn’t bigger news. It’s the story of some wealthy 16 year old from Fort Worth named Ethan Couch:

According to police, Couch was going 70 miles-per-hour in his father’s Ford F-350 pickup in a 40 mph zone when he lost control and started a deadly chain of collisions that claimed the lives of: 24-year-old Breanna Mitchell, whose car had broken down on the side of the road; Hollie Boyles and her 21-year-old daughter Shelby, who lived nearby and had come outside to help Mitchell; and Brian Jennings, a youth pastor who was also playing the role of good samaritan. Two of the seven passengers riding in Couch’s truck were also seriously injured.

Earlier in the night, police say that several of the passengers were caught on camerastealing two cases of beer from a local Walmart. At the time of the crash, Couch had a blood alcohol content of 0.24, three times the legal limit for an adult, and also hadtraces of Valium in his system, according to police. He pleaded guilty last week to four counts of intoxication manslaughter and two counts of intoxication assault causing serious bodily injury.

 A psychologist called by the defense described Couch as a product of “affluenza.” He reportedly testified that the teen’s family felt wealth bought privilege, and that Couch’s life could be turned around with one to two years of treatment and no contact with his parents.

Couch was sentenced by a juvenile court judge Tuesday. If he violates the terms of his probation, he could face up to 10 years of incarceration, according to a statement from the Tarrant County Criminal District Attorney’s Office.

In keeping with the psychologist’s recommendation, the Texas District Court Judge Jean Boyd ordered that Couch would not be released into the custody of his parents, but would instead be entered into a private counseling center that, according to the Huffington Post, will cost his father $450,000. According to The Dallas Morning News, the counseling center, located just outside of Newport Beach, California, offers “chef-prepared meals, equine therapy, martial-arts training, yoga and nature hikes.” Thus providing a “respectful recovery environment” in which wayward teens can get “the unconditional love they require.” Couch’s defense attorney, Scott Brown, told KTVT that the sentence will “keep Ethan under the thumb of the justice system for the next 10 years, and if Ethan doesn’t do what he’s supposed to do, if he has one misstep at all, then this judge, or an adult judge when he’s transferred, can then incarcerate him.”

I’ll tell you who has to be excited about the outcome from this trial – Aaron Hernandez. Affluenza? If some BS like that can work in Texas, where the policy is fry em’ first try em’ later, then think of the possibilities this defense has in the socialist bastion of Massachusetts. At this rate Hernandez will be back in a Patriots’ uniform for the playoffs. And after today’s debacle in Miami it’s pretty clear we need him immediately.


So apparently in America if you’re a teenager whose parents are filthy rich you can literally rob a Walmart, pound a million beers with your redneck buddies, jump into a pick up truck, kill four innocent people, and at the end of the day….no big deal? Basically what’s happened here is the four innocent victims were the bad guys here right? That’s what the judge is saying. This kid suffered from a very serious and real disease called “affluenza”, and the victims got in his way. It was their fault of course, not his. Should’ve known that at any moment an over privileged nudnik would come steamrolling at them with a BAC level of .24.

How is this not a bigger story? Because it’s a white kid killing a bunch of other white people? To me this is such a bigger miscarriage of justice than the Trayvon Martin-George Zimmerman verdict. What happened to Trayvon Martin was tragic and should never have happened, but at least with that there are two sides to the story which complicated the crap out of it. With that one at least the defense could attempt to say that Zimmerman was defending himself (I say that Zimmerman got the ass beating he deserved and was looking for).

This one though? Pretty straight forward. Dooshnozzle kid robs a Walmart, gets wasted, goes joyriding and kills a bunch of people who chose to stop and help someone else in need. This is probably the easiest case to give the maximum punishment to. You give this kid the maximum sentence and who complains? No one. Now though you’re gonna have rich people running wild, raping, killing, and plundering, and getting away with it. Oh wait…..

36085177 tumblr_lg8gdpkrli1qzx0t2o1_4001 1284320278_funny-sports-pictures-rape-faceSo what do you think? Feel free to share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.


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2 Comment(s)
  • Blong
    December 17, 2013 at 1:16 am


  • Joey G
    December 16, 2013 at 6:50 pm

    Imagine a rich white kid in front of a Cambridge jury full of people with hyphenated names, gender-neutral pronouns, and those who want to make up for the legal system’s injustices against blacks??? They might hang him.

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